Unlocking the Power of Persuasion, Time Management, and Change: PART 3 Chapters 10-13 (Grant Bosnick)
Welcome back to Season 13 of the Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast! In this episode, we explore Part 3 of our review of Grant Bosnick's book on self-leadership, focusing on Chapters 10 to 13. Discover how the latest neuroscience research can enhance your skills in persuasion, time management, change, and agility.
Dive deep into the nuances of persuasion and influence, learn effective time management techniques, understand the brain's response to change, and enhance your mental and physical agility. Join us as we uncover insightful strategies to apply in your leadership journey.
And we will now resume PART 3 of our 4-PART review, to sum up last year, 2024, and our entire year studying one book, Grant Bosnick’s “Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership: A Bite Size Approach Using Psychology and Neuroscience” that we first dove into with our interview on EP #321[i] the end of January 2024. The goal was that each week, we focused on learning something new, (from Grant’s book) tied to the most current neuroscience research, that builds off the prior week, to help take us to greater heights this year. It honestly shocked me that this series took the entire year. We began with PART 1[ii] and the first 5 chapters of the book. PART 2[iii] we reviewed chapters 6-9 of Grant Bosnick’s Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, and today, PART 3, today, we will review chapters 10-13. We will finish with PART 4, Chapters 14-16 after we release our FIRST interview of 2025, coming next weekend.
((On today's EPISODE #357 PART 3 of our review of Grant Bosnick’s Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, we will cover)):
✔ EP 336 Chapter 10[iv]“The Neuroscience of Persuasion and Influence”
✔ EP 337 Chapter 11[v] “The Neuroscience of Time Management”
✔ EP 339 Chapter 12[vi] “The Neuroscience of Change”
✔ EP 342 Chapter 13[vii] “Mastering Mental and Physical Agility”
If you have not yet taken the leadership self-assessment, or if you would like to re-take it to see if the results are different for you than last year, you can click the link here to find the quick test.
I re-took the assessment for 2025, and did notice some similarities and some differences. See what you notice about yourself. I noticed that pathways 2 and 3 are my high areas of focus this year, and that I can drop pathway 6 from my focus. What about you? If you have a few minutes to spare, take this leadership self-assessment again, and see if you notice any changes in your areas of focus for 2025. Did any of your pathways shift for you, since last year? This is an incredible way to be laser focused on pathways that will move the needle of success for YOU this year.
✔ EP 336 Chapter 10 “The Neuroscience of Persuasion and Influence”
On this episode, we looked at Jack Carew’s classic book from 1987 called You’ll Never Get No For an Answer that was covered on EP 176.[viii]
Carew looked at the unique strategies that American Author and Salesman Og Mandino encouraged us all to read to improve our communication and influence with others and I noticed that Strategy 2 was to stop looking out for number one and always look for how you can help others first.
So, after noticing this, I went straight to Chapter 10 of Grant Bosnick’s book, on “Persuade and Influence” to see what he had to say on this topic.
Right off the bat, in the opening of this chapter, Bosnick asks us to think about how we would persuade someone else to do something, like give you a pen you would like to have, for example, or ask for a promotion, or ask someone to do something you would like them to do.
Then he differentiates the word persuade that he says “we can think of as quick, more direct, more for short-term or immediate gain” (Chapter 10, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership) while influence he says “is softer, more subtle, much more for longer term and lasting gain.” (Chapter 10, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership)
Persuasion Bosnick says is “more tactical, whereas influence is strategic.” He gives us the history of persuasion, explaining its origin from the early Greek Philosophers, and that Aristotle wrote about three modes of persuasion: logos (that’s about logic and reason), pathos (that’s about emotion and inspiration) and ethos (that’s about the speaker’s own character and credibility).
Thinking of Jack Carew’s second tip in his book to improve our influence with others (by putting other people first) I think is a good example of a strategy that builds this concept for long-lasting gain (influence) versus persuading someone to give me something that I need for short-term, or immediate gain (like, to pass me their pen, so I can write down something important that I’ll need to remember). I want to build influence with others, that’s long-term, that I think includes logic and reason (logos), emotion and inspiration (pathos) and a person’s character and credibility (ethos). All 3 of the modes of persuasion, to me, make up longer term influence with someone.
We learned on this episode that “There are 6 short cuts to increase the chances that someone will be persuaded or even better, influenced by us” (Robert Cialdini)
We covered the first three is Robert Cialdini’s book:
1. Reciprocity: We are obliged to give back, if we have been given something. Use the neuroscience of influence and persuasion, and think of ways to help others first, instead of thinking what you can gain from other people, think of what you can give to them. Always be the first to give and take the time to make sure what you are giving is actually useful to that person. This way, what you will give will have meaning to that person.
2. Scarcity. If something is scarce, we want it more. Use this by highlighting the Benefits, Uniqueness and Possible sense of Loss. Take the time to find out how what you are offering to someone else, will help them. You will need to find out what they are looking for to do this, by asking questions, and listening. Then you can “frame what you are saying/offering, so others will find it to be valuable”[ix] especially if it is something that is difficult to come by, or scarce.
3. Authority. We are more likely to comply with a request if it is coming from a perceived authority/expert. Being introduced by others FIRST is a fast way to have others learn about your expertise, making you instantly more influential and persuasive, rather than you introducing yourself.
My take-away from this episode: If I want to improve my influence, it begins with understanding the wants and needs of others first (how can I help them) and then being able to say what I mean, and mean what I say. The words I speak do matter when I’m working on gaining influence. If I’m speaking with someone, and not being completely honest, or not meaning what I say, I know that this can be felt by the other person, and it will hurt my ability to gain trust, rapport and influence. Our brains really can detect “benefits and threats”[x] and I want to be sure that I’m drawing those I want to interact with towards me, not away from me.
Once I have gained influence with someone I am speaking with, then I can take my persuasion skills to the next level, and we can begin to work together on our common goals.
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✔ EP 337 Chapter 11 “The Neuroscience Behind Effective Time Management”
This topic we covered early on our podcast, with a video from author Kent Healy, who wrote Success Principles for Teens[xi] that he co-authored with Jack Canfield.
Kent created a video for me (many years ago) that we used with students in the classroom, and I featured this video on EP 33[iv] of our podcast that was called “Time Management, the Greatest Asset We Have” and Kent gives a perspective to the amount of time we have, in a way that 15 years later, I’ve still not forgotten his words in this video recording. You can watch Kent’s explanation of “time management”[xii] with the visuals that he provided, reminding us that “we all have the same amount of time” and he even breaks it down and tells us how many seconds we have every day (84,600 seconds to be exact) every day. While ALL the experts agree that we can’t create more time, or change this number, some will say we can use our time to generate more of something else (like energy) but Kent’s message was about using this time (these 84,600 seconds we have each day wisely) and focus on what we can control, and that’s our personal growth.
He gives an example of adding just 15 extra minutes a day towards learning something new, and that adds up to 3.8 full days a year, and asks us to think of what value we put on 15 minutes of time. I loved Kent’s point of view, and always respect people who use their time wisely.
Then we looked at the Neuroscience of Time Management and learned that our chronotype “the natural inclination of your body to sleep at a certain time or what people understand as being an early bird versus a night owl”[xiii] should be factored into our Time Management Strategy.
We learned that “For those people who go to bed around 9:30pm-11:30pm and wake in the window of 6am-8am that there tends to be an increase in (dopamine, norepinephrine, epinephrine, 0-8 hours after waking, which leads to increases in alertness, attention and focus that are great for analytical work, great for implementation of strategies that you already understand.” Dr. Andrew Huberman with Guest Dr. Adam Grant
As we are thinking about the best strategies to manage our activities, projects, the extra time that Kent Healy thinks should go to self-improvement, or even the roles we have in our personal and professional lives, in order to have access to this extra energy, and creative thinking, we will want to plan our “deep” work 0-8 hours after waking (if our chronotype is the wake up early type). So, be sure you understand your own chronotype, and factor the science into your time management strategy.
This made me think of Grant Bosnick’s Top Energy Drainers:
Procrastination
Saying Yes to Everything
The Perfectionist
With this extra energy, and creative thinking, (from better managing our time) I suggested to put it all into creative prolific quality work (the perfectionist in me). I thought, why not use the extra energy to combat against procrastination, while protecting our time by saying no to everything, (at first). I know we can always come back to projects that you would like to do, that have meaning to you, but by truly managing our energy and activities, we are protecting this commodity that we all have in the same amounts: time.
This episode also make me think that those 84,600 seconds that Kent Healy reminded me that we all have each day, and how 15 minutes a day (that adds up to 3.8 days/year) can be used even more wisely with this understanding of The Neuroscience of Time Management.
Think About These Questions:
Do you value your time?
Do you value other people’s time?
Do you think 15 minutes of time really matters?
I will also add, have you ever thought of the impact of counting time, down to the amount of seconds that we have each day?
How important is 20 seconds of your time? OR, 20 seconds of someone else’s time?
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EP 339 Chapter 12 “The Neuroscience of Change”
On this EP we looked at two examples of what happens to our brain when we see something our brain wasn’t expecting, like a breathtaking view, or when we land the promotion we worked so hard to achieve, Bosnick explains “we feel like we got a reward. It’s a rush. We get a sensation in our brain and a hit of the big neurochemicals” dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, norephinephrine, adrenaline.” (Page 132, Ch 12, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership).
However, on the other hand, when we see a bear in the woods, (or snake on the hiking trails), or we are overlooked for a promotion at work, our brain actually sees this “like it’s a threat. We feel tense, stressed, pressure…our body physically feels it.”
We learned that “Neuroscience has shown us, that the feeling we get from a social or emotional threat (like being passed over for the promotion) is the same as the feeling we get from a physical threat (like seeing a bear or a snake).
When we see how our brain interprets “everything and everyone we meet as either a reward or a threat” we can better understand “how our body reacts, (and) our brain and mind think, (leading) to the decisions, behaviors and actions we make.” (Page 132, Ch 12, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership).
Next on this EP, we reviewed Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs that led to “Self-Determination Theory” around the year 2000 where researchers found that there were “three physiological needs: the need for Competence (feeling valued for our knowledge, skills and experience), the need for Relatedness (collaborating, connecting or serving others) and the need for Autonomy (being able to exercise self-regulation…to achieve our goals.” (Page 133, Ch 12, Bosnick).
We learned that when our ACRES are being met, (our autonomy, competence, relatedness, equity, and sureness) it will put us in a toward state and we will fully embrace everything ahead of us; (but) if our ACRES are threatened, it will put us in an “away state” and will then resist or block things ahead of us.
Looking at Bosnick’s ACRES example, we examined a work experience in our past, that we did not enjoy, to see where it went against the ACRES Model of Needs. With brain science in mind, we can gain more understanding of why we either enjoyed, or didn’t enjoy this experience. It all led back to how our brain either interprets the experience as a reward, or a threat.
We also looked at triggers to be aware of to mitigate threat, during times of change.
Finally, we looked at how to change our nervous system, to change our actions and behaviors, so we can leave behind a legacy (or fossil record as Dr. Huberman calls it) that we are proud of.
We learned that “Agitation and strain is the entry point to neuroplasticity” Dr. Huberman
This is when lasting CHANGE is happening at the brain level, and impacting our entire nervous system. So when we are working on something, (like trying to learn something new…like understanding the neuroscience of change for this episode) and that limbic friction feeling comes up, (and I’m annoyed or agitated) when something just doesn’t click. I now have a deeper understanding of what’s happening at the brain level after this EP. I will now push forward, stay positive and lean into the change that I know is happening in my brain, as I embrace the change that comes with doing difficult work.
The Neuroscience of Change is an exciting topic, and it’s only going to be strengthened with the next two topics, Agility and Resilience.
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EP 342 Chapter 13 “Mastering Mental and Physical Agility”
Which leads us to the final EP of our review today. “Mastering Mental and Physical Agility”
Before I even review this EP, I thought of something I saw on Twitter/X this morning that caught my attention.
It was a post from Chris S Cornell whose handle is @BiggestComeback and he was talking about his first attempt to run a mile, with a kettlebell. He faced some criticism for this post, as some said it was “dangerous” but mentioned that he thought that “spending your life on the couch with a remote in one hand and a beer in the other is far more dangerous.”[xiv] (Chris Cornell)
While this pathway came out as a low priority for me last year, and this year, I have to say, it’s definitely NOT an area I leave off to the side. I’m always looking to see how I can push my mind or body, just a bit past where I’m comfortable, and when life is difficult, this is actually where I thrive. While I don’t think I could run a mile with a kettle bell, I did run 7 miles today with a 16 pound weighted vest. I really do believe in the mind/body connection and that by doing things that are difficult, we strengthen the brain. We did dive deeper into this concept on EP 344[xv] with “The Neuroscience of Resilience” that we will review next time, but we uncovered that by doing difficult things, we increase the size of a part of our brain called the anterior midcingulate cortex. (Dr. Andrew Huberman).
I do difficult things because I want to improve my mental and physical strength, and in turn, increase the size of this important part in my brain that Dr. Huberman says “is not just the seat of willpower…but scientists think it holds the secret in the will to live.”
If you are like me, and enjoy doing difficult things, you will enjoy when we looked at three terms from the book Antifragile by N Taleb[xvi] where the author says there are three types of systems, organizations or people.
The fragile: which is like an egg and breaks under stress. No one wants to be labeled as fragile.
The robust: which is like a phoenix, when destroyed comes back exactly as it was before. This is a step in the right direction, but who wants to emerge from challenge the same as before?
The antifragile: gets stronger from uncertainty—like the Hydra from the Greek myth where you cut off one head, two grows back in its place. It gets stronger from the sudden change.
We learned that when we face challenges, changes and stressors, we want to become antifragile in the process so that we grow from adversity, and become stronger in the process.
While we did go deep into the stressors and triggers that can stop our course of action, Bosnick suggested that we rate our stressors (from a list he provided to jog our minds), on a scale of 1-5. Then he reminds us of the three types of people, showing us how we can and most definitely will grow from adversity, sustaining our peak performance, and finally what we want to take away from this chapter is how to “train our brain to be antifragile in order to be more agile in the moment when we face challenges or stressors.” (Chapter 13, Bosnick, Page 149)
I don’t think that running a mile with a kettle bell is for me (even if a part of me wonders how far I could go before I would lose the grip of something that heavy), I will continue to challenge my mind, as we learned from our most downloaded series, The Silva Method that “Once we learn to use our mind (to train it) it will do some astounding things, as you will soon see.”
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REVIEW and CONCLUSION:
To review and conclude this week’s episode #357 on PART 3 of our review of Grant Bosnick’s Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, we covered a review of the strategies that can help us to implement each concept, from chapters 10, 11, 12, and 13.
EPISODE #357 PART 3 of our review of Grant Bosnick’s Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, we will cover:
✔ EP 336 Chapter 10[xvii]“The Neuroscience of Persuasion and Influence”
✔ EP 337 Chapter 11[xviii] “The Neuroscience of Time Management”
✔ EP 339 Chapter 12[xix] “The Neuroscience of Change”
✔ EP 342 Chapter 13[xx] “Mastering Mental and Physical Agility”
We will see you next time, with our PART 4, our final part in this review.
Stay tuned as we launch our interview series, with NEW inspiring interviews with experts who are working deeply with the most current neuroscience research.
See you next week!
REFERENCES:
[i] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #321 with Grant ‘Upbeat’ Bosnick https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/insights-from-grant-upbeat-bosnick/
[ii]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #355 Mastering Self-Leadership REVIEW PART 1 (Grant Bosnick) https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/mastering-self-leadership-with-neuroscience/
[iii] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #356 Mastering Self-Leadership REVIEW PART 2 (Grant Bosnick)https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/unlocking-the-secrets-of-self-leadership-chapters-6-to-9-review/
[iv] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #330 “The Neuroscience of Persuasion and Influence” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/unlocking-the-science-of-persuasion-and-influence/
[v] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #337 “The Neuroscience of Time Management” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/mastering-time-the-neuroscience-behind-effective-time-management/
[vi] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE 339 “The Neuroscience of Change” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/embracing-change-the-neuroscience-behind-thriving-in-2024/
[vii]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE 342 “Mastering Mental and Physical Agility” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/mastering-mental-and-physical-agility-strategies-for-self-leadership/
[viii] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #176 https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/the-neuroscience-of-communication-why-our-brain-doesn-t-like-the-word-no/
[ix] The Neuroscience of Influence https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-5CZ2AXT1o
[x] The Neuroscience of Influence Leadership Coaching by Dean Newlund https://mfileadership.com/2021/01/27/the-neuroscience-of-influence/
[xi] Success Principles for Teens by Jack Canfield and Kent Healy April 15, 2008 https://www.amazon.com/Success-Principles-Teens-Where-Want/dp/0757307272
[xii] Author Kent Healy on “Time Management: Our Greatest Asset” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_ibHzu751I
[xiii] Chronotypes Definition https://www.sleepfoundation.org/how-sleep-works/chronotypes#:~:text=Chronotype%20is%20the%20natural%20inclination,bird%20versus%20a%20night%20owl.
[xiv] https://x.com/BiggestComeback/status/1895906308785615336
[xv]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #344 “The Neuroscience of Resilience: Building Stronger Minds and Teams” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/the-neuroscience-of-resilience-building-stronger-minds-and-teams/
[xvi] Antifragile by Nassim Taleb Published Jan. 28, 2014 https://www.amazon.com/Antifragile-Things-That-Disorder-Incerto/dp/0812979680
[xvii] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #330 “The Neuroscience of Persuasion and Influence” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/unlocking-the-science-of-persuasion-and-influence/
[xviii] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #337 “The Neuroscience of Time Management” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/mastering-time-the-neuroscience-behind-effective-time-management/
[xix] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE 339 “The Neuroscience of Change” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/embracing-change-the-neuroscience-behind-thriving-in-2024/
[xx]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE 342 “Mastering Mental and Physical Agility” https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/mastering-mental-and-physical-agility-strategies-for-self-leadership/
Ireland