MFP 358: Thriving, not just surviving with lots of littles
Summary Are you exhausted, overwhelmed, or wondering whether you're doing anything right as a parent of little ones? You're not alone — and you're not crazy. In this refreshed and expanded episode, Mike and Alicia revisit their classic "Survival Zone" conversation with new insights from another decade of parenting and now grandparenting. They unpack why the early years are so intense, what's normal (hint: your exhaustion), how marriage is stretched during this season, and how moms and dads can support each other through the chaos. You'll hear practical advice on setting realistic ideals, finding community, leaning on others for help, navigating time traps like social media, letting dads step up in their unique way, and prioritizing your marriage in the midst of diapers and dishes. Whether you're in the trenches right now or reflecting back on that season, this episode offers encouragement, perspective, and a reminder: this won't last forever — and it will make you stronger. Key Takeaways Reassess ideals Consider getting outside help - isolation hurts this Dads have to step in - great opportunity for men to gain confidence Get out alone together Beware of "time traps" Get some good routines going that work for you This is training for your life. If you can do this, you can do anything Couple Discussion Questions How can we support each other during this time? What are the greatest lessons that we are learning? 🙏 If this ministry has blessed you, please consider supporting the Messy Family Project! https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/give 📋 Take our 2025 Listener Survey: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MXKQLYW For more information on this and other topics visit: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/
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MFP 357: Marriage Q&A: When It Feels Hard, How Do You Stay Connected?
In this honest Q&A episode, Mike and Alicia answer real questions from listeners about the struggles every couple faces – feeling distant, managing conflict, and staying united when life gets stressful. They talk about what to do when your marriage feels dry or disconnected, how to rebuild emotional intimacy, and how humility, forgiveness, and shared prayer can bring healing. With humor and wisdom from decades of marriage and mentoring, they offer hope for couples who want to grow together, not just stay together. Couples Discussion Questions What should I do when my spouse seems emotionally distant? How can we reconnect after a big argument? How do we stay close when life feels overwhelming? What if I'm the only one trying to fix our marriage? Whether you're newly married or in the thick of family life, this episode will remind you: every marriage has hard seasons, but grace makes growth possible. We'd love your feedback! Take our 2025 Listener Survey and help us serve families better: https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MFP-2025 For more information on this and other topics visit: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/
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MFP 356: Twenty Minutes to Change a Kid's Life – the Importance of Family Dinners
Families need to disconnect from the world's pace, be present to one another and break bread together. - Bishop Thomas Olmstead Summary Why are family dinners so hard — and so important? In our latest Messy Family Podcast episode, we get real about the chaos of mealtime: the cooking, the planning, the juggling schedules, picky eaters, and the endless cleanup. But we also share the good news — it doesn't have to be perfect to matter. Family meals aren't just about food. They're a time to build identity, teach traditions, and give your kids a sense of belonging. Research shows that sharing meals boosts kids' grades, strengthens communication, and protects against depression and risky behaviors. We'll give you practical tips to make family meals doable — even joyful — in the middle of everyday mess. From simple routines to conversation starters and kid-friendly chores, this episode will help you make mealtime your family's "north star." Listen now and rediscover the power of your dinner table! Key Takeaways Close with: "Those 20 minutes around your table might be the most important minutes of your child's day." Recap: Family meals strengthen minds, hearts, and homes Make it a priority Have a routine Use the time to connect Include the kids to make it happen! Couple Discussion Questions How often does your family sit down together? What is one thing we can do to improve our time together?
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MFP 355: Making Your Marriage #1
Summary In this re-release of Episode MFP191, we open up about one of the biggest challenges every couple faces—finding time for each other in the midst of busy family life. After 31 years of marriage, we've learned that love doesn't just grow on its own; it takes intention and effort because although our marriages are always Important, they are rarely Urgent. In this episode, we share our own stories, some laughs, and practical ways to stay connected—whether through daily check-ins, regular date nights, or an occasional weekend away. We also talk about how to make this happen and what to do when you are together to use your time well. When we invest time in our marriage, our whole family benefits. So take a moment, grab your spouse, and listen with us. Let's strengthen our marriages together—because your relationship is worth every minute. Key Takeaways Marriage is never Urgent, but it is always Important. That means you have to intentionally take time for your spouse Marriage is good for people and their mental, emotional, and even physical health. We need to give our spouse our time - daily connections, date nights, and extended time away. Lack of time together leads to decreased "love tank". A full "love tank" smooths out the rough spots in marriage and makes it easier to ignore the little things. You have to be together without the children to renew your marriage and make strong the "couple love" between you which is essential for them. You need a community around you to give inspiration and support for your marriage. Make boundaries and goals for your time together. Use it wisely! Couple Discussion Questions When is our daily connection and regular date night? What is the best way for us to spend that time together?
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MFP354: How Can I Have a Relationship with God?
"Being Christian is not the result of an ethical choice or a lofty idea, but the encounter with an event, a person, which gives life a new horizon and a decisive direction." - Pope Benedict XVI Summary Every one of us is on a journey towards eternity. Our life here on earth, our vocation, our careers, our relationships are all just ways that we can grow in our knowledge of ourselves and of God. But many of us struggle to learn how we can stretch ourselves and prioritize our own spiritual growth. In this podcast, we share our own stories of conversation moments and how our spiritual practices have changed and matured over the years. We hope this will give you some inspiration and ideas of how you can come closer to God our Loving Father and see that none of us are ever "done". We are all on a journey towards our eternal home. Key Takeaways To be a good mother or father you must first know who you are as a beloved son or daughter. Do things that put yourself in that place to receive from God such as mass, regular confession, and staying in a state of grace. Be honest about where you are in your season of life. Adopt spiritual practices accordingly Our perception of God is colored by our experience of our parents. Do we see God as having high or low expectations of us? Do we see God giving us high or low support to achieve those expectations? The most healthy relationship has high expectations and high support to achieve them. Recognize that we are constantly growing and maturing in our relationship with God and others. Growth takes time! Couple Discussion Questions What is our perception of God and the Church? Where are we right now in our relationship with Him? How can we as spouses help each other grow in our relationship with both? Resources Go here to purchase these books! https://amzn.to/3O6ce8V
About Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
Parenting is not a clean-cut, simple process for those who like to follow the rules. Family life is messy and unpredictable, but it is the greatest adventure you will ever have. We are Mike and Alicia Hernon, parents of 10 children with a growing number of grandchildren, and we would like to invite you into some of the conversations we have had with each other about marriage, parenting, and Catholic family life. Our hope is that our conversation sparks a dialogue between you and your spouse that leads to greater unity and intentional Christian parenting in your home. Listen in to our podcast and start the conversation as we seek to lead our families to heaven.
Visit us at https:///www/MessyFamilyProject.org for resources, guides, links and show notes.
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