Five football clubs in 10 seconds, Ekitike's non-haunting & prime minister Martin Keown
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by David Walker and Nick Miller. On the agenda: some very niche feedback on Peter Drury's commentary, a never-before-attempted example of “X of Sport Y" hyperbole, Jonathan Pearce embraces some Champions League pronunciation, Hugo Ekitike and "football's worst hauntings", one of the swiftest commentators curses of all time, a PE teacher sacked for lying about their football career and a comprehensive first-hand list of Richard Keys’s mates.
Meanwhile, the panel decide what constitutes "the cavalry" in football and tackle a tantalising question about the resale value of a footballer's match-worn football boots.
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52:45
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52:45
Scottish League Two scores, leaked fines lists & the sixth penalty taker: The listeners' loves & hates
Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations.
Among the selections are the egalitarian approach of football results shows, the psychological impact of the height of the main camera angle, that moment of uncertainty as a referee indicates a goal kick and not a penalty and one of the most nuanced observations on the language of football the pod has ever faced.
Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel enjoy an inevitable Sean Dyche moment and some curious Champions League commentary.
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50:03
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50:03
Live show legends, Liverpool's 18ft 10in strike force & a new Neville noise
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Gary Neville finds a new frequency of noise at Anfield, whether Evangelos Marinakis is too "chaos Serie A" for Our League, Soccer Saturday somehow invents a new scoreline format after 33 years, Liverpool having too many rangy forwards and the earliest you can "not want this first half to end".
Meanwhile, the panel build up for the business end of the Clichés Live tour and wonder if a Saturday 3pm kick-off could ever be the best Premier League game of the season.
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41:04
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41:04
The Cape Verdean Dan Burn, Keysey the actor & the Communication XI
Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and Nick Miller. On the agenda: Nick's first-hand account of Cape Verde's World Cup qualification glory, an important question about pitch-invading animals, Thomas Tuchel defies the manufactured outrage once again, the most “in the departure lounge” England player, football clichés as film titles and a long-overdue assessment of Richard Keys’ acting abilities.
Meanwhile, the panel put together a barking, haranguing and roaring Communication XI.
Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com
The Football Clichés Live tour continues - get your tickets here: https://tickets.footballcliches.com
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55:36
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55:36
Own-goal flavours, casual retirements & football clubs as sperm counts
Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: Lee Dixon invents some new "goalkeeper's not saving that" hyperbole, Sean Dyche's potential new job, the difference between "comedy" and "bizarre" own goals, poor cricket knowledge in Stephen King novels, the Daily Mail's "Champagne Socialists XI", footballers who forget to officially retire, tenuous footballspeak in microwave adverts and Duncan Ferguson's insight into the obsessive mind of a goalscorer.
Meanwhile, the panel reflect on the live tour so far, including a glorious sold-out night at the Hackney Empire.
Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com
The Football Clichés Live tour continues - get your tickets here: https://tickets.footballcliches.com
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Deconstructing the gloriously unique language of football – the words, the phrases and the tiny things you didn't think you cared about – with Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare & David Walker.
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Ireland