Two Become Family Podcast: Conversations and Encouragement For Your Catholic Family

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This episode is sponsored by Alto from Ascension.
Alto is Ascension’s monthly printed prayer companion that brings together, daily Mass readings, Morning and Night Prayer from the Liturgy of the Hours, reflections, saints, novenas, and more—all in one place. Learn more and subscribe to Alto here: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Use our code: TWO10 for 10% off your first purchase.

Chapters
00:00 – A Word from Our Sponsor, Alto 00:21 – Why Gen Z Needs to Know St. John Paul II 00:57 – JP2 on Freedom and the Gift of Self 02:42 – Why True Freedom Requires Interior Discipline 03:52 – Why Loving Your Family Is Harder Than Loving a Dog 06:17 – How Duty and Freedom Work Together 07:56 – Preparing Yourself to Receive God’s Grace 09:55 – Alto: Building a Daily Prayer Life 12:08 – Why Self-Discipline Isn’t the Same as Holiness 14:12 – JP2 on Marriage as Good News for the World 16:42 – Your Family Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect 18:34 – Living the Mission of Family Life 20:14 – Why We’re Returning to Our JP2 Roots 22:05 – Closing Thoughts
Freedom cannot be understood as a license to do absolutely anything: it means a gift of self. Even more: it means an interior discipline of the gift. The idea of gift contains not only the free initiative of the subject, but also the aspect of duty. All this is made real in the "communion of persons". We find ourselves again at the very heart of each family.  — St. John Paul II, Letter to Families (Gratissimam Sane), §14. 

I urge you, dear Christian families, to show by your daily lives that despite numerous difficulties and obstacles marriage is able to be fully lived out as a meaningful experience and as "good news" for the men and women of today. Be leaders in the Church and in the world: this is a responsibility flowing from your celebration of the Sacrament of Matrimony, from your being a domestic church, and from the marital mission which is yours as the primary cells of society  — Address to the Fourth World Meeting of Families, 2003. 
Two Become Family is a Catholic marriage and family podcast with Renzo and Monica Ortega, encouraging couples to believe in what they are and discover holiness in ordinary family life.
Support the show
BOOKS, WRITING, AND RESOURCES
📕 Order Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse
https://www.avemariapress.com/products/lovemaking
📕 Pre-Order The Quest For The Male Soul: Discover What Your Life Is For
https://a.co/d/08A9vSRh
Alto from Ascension’s learn more and subscribe to Alto: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Our Merch
https://www.two-become-family-shop.fourthwall.com
✍️ Read our writing on Catholic marriage, family life, communication, intimacy, parenting, and ordinary holiness: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com

🎤 Book Renzo and Monica to speak for your parish, diocese, marriage retreat, conference, or Catholic event: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com/p/book-renzo-and-monica-to-speak-for

🏠 Learn more about Two Become Family: ...

Send us a voicemail to tell us what you think!
This episode is sponsored by Alto from Ascension.
Alto is Ascension’s monthly printed prayer companion that brings together, daily Mass readings, Morning and Night Prayer from the Liturgy of the Hours, reflections, saints, novenas, and more—all in one place. Learn more and subscribe to Alto here: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Use our code: TWO10 for 10% off your first purchase. 
Today’s episode:
Does getting your child an ADHD diagnosis help them understand themselves—or does it risk giving them a label they’ll carry for the rest of their life?
After Renzo’s adult ADHD diagnosis and now navigating ADHD diagnoses with two of our children, we’ve wrestled with this question ourselves.
In this episode, we talk about why we chose to pursue an ADHD diagnosis for our kids, the difference between a diagnosis and a label, and why understanding the way a child’s brain works doesn’t have to mean lowering expectations for them.
We also talk about emotional regulation, accommodations, discipline, medication, the spiritual life, and what we hope our kids gain from understanding their ADHD before entering their teenage and adult years.
For us, the goal isn’t to tell our children, “This is who you are.”
It’s to help them understand: “This is something you have. Now let’s learn how to work with it.”
We’re not medical professionals, and this isn’t medical advice. We’re simply sharing our experience as parents and what Renzo has learned from being diagnosed with ADHD as an adult.
Chapters
00:00 Our family's experience with ADHD
01:46 Does a diagnosis become a label?
02:29 Why we pursued diagnoses for our children
03:56 ADHD or just normal childhood behavior?
06:11 Accommodations without lowering expectations
07:42 Helping children overcome their limitations
09:40 A word from our sponsor, Alto
11:00 You have ADHD. You are not ADHD.
12:36 ADHD, emotions, and the spiritual life
15:13 Why a diagnosis can change how you see yourself
17:16 Why everyday habits can be harder with ADHD
18:31 Our experience with ADHD medication
20:12 How medication has affected our family life
22:51 Medication doesn't replace discipline
23:53 Final thoughts
Support the show
BOOKS, WRITING, AND RESOURCES
📕 Order Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse
https://www.avemariapress.com/products/lovemaking
📕 Pre-Order The Quest For The Male Soul: Discover What Your Life Is For
https://a.co/d/08A9vSRh
Alto from Ascension’s learn more and subscribe to Alto: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Our Merch
https://www.two-become-family-shop.fourthwall.com
✍️ Read our writing on Catholic marriage, family life, communication, intimacy, parenting, and ordinary holiness: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com

🎤 Book Renzo and Monica to speak for your parish, diocese, marriage retreat, conference, or Catholic event: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com/p/book-renzo-and-monica-to-speak-for

🏠 Learn more about Two Become Family: ...

Send us a voicemail to tell us what you think!
This episode is sponsored by Alto from Ascension.
Alto is Ascension’s monthly printed prayer companion that brings together, daily Mass readings, Morning and Night Prayer from the Liturgy of the Hours, reflections, saints, novenas, and more—all in one place. Learn more and subscribe to Alto here: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Use our code: TWO10 for 10% off your first purchase. 

Today’s episode:
Family life is hard sometimes. That doesn’t necessarily mean something is wrong. Bedtime battles. Potty training. Kids who need you constantly. Work changes. Caring for aging parents. Moving. Financial stress. Seasons when you and your spouse love each other but barely have enough energy left at the end of the day to talk.
In this episode, we talk about the temptation to treat the normal difficulties of marriage and family life as problems that need to be fixed—and how to discern the difference between a difficult season you need to walk through and a situation where you really do need help.
St. John Paul II offers a beautiful way of looking at these seasons: “Family prayer has for its very own object family life itself, which in all its varying circumstances is seen as a call from God and lived as a filial response to His call.”
In this episode:
• Why difficult doesn’t automatically mean dysfunctional
• The temptation to make comfort the measure of a healthy family
• Why some parenting struggles are simply part of raising children
• How prayer changes the way we experience difficult seasons
• How to discern when you may actually need help
• Why John Paul II tells young couples to seek out experienced married couples
• What real human accompaniment gives us that the internet and AI cannot
• How couples who have been helped can eventually become the couples who help others
Chapters
00:00 Is Your Marriage Broken or Just a Hard Season?
02:43 Are Companies Selling Solutions to Normal Parenting Struggles?
04:28 When Parenting Leaves No Time for Your Marriage
07:26 Why Difficult Parenting Seasons Are Normal
08:19 Why Your Children Need You So Much
10:18 St. John Paul II on Prayer During Hard Family Seasons
12:25 Alto: Making Prayer Easier Without Your Phone
14:16 Other Difficult Seasons of Marriage and Family Life
15:06 Stop Wishing for a Different Season of Life
17:13 Are Your Kids Really the Problem?
18:12 How Do You Know When Your Marriage Needs Help?
19:36 Why AI Cannot Replace Experienced Married Couples
21:13 Finding Support and Wisdom from Other Couples
23:43 Becoming a Source of Encouragement for Other Families

Support the show
BOOKS, WRITING, AND RESOURCES
📕 Order Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse
https://www.avemariapress.com/products/lovemaking
📕 Pre-Order The Quest For The Male Soul: Discover What Your Life Is For
https://a.co/d/08A9vSRh
Alto from Ascension’s learn more and subscribe to Alto: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Our Merch
https://www.two-become-family-shop.fourthwall.com
✍️ Read our writing on Catholic marriage, family life, communication, intimacy, parenting, and ordinary holiness: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com

🎤 Book Renzo and Monica to speak for your parish, diocese, marriage retreat, conference, or Catholic event: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com/p/book-renzo-and-monica-to-speak-for

🏠 Learn more about Two Become Family: ...

Send us a voicemail to tell us what you think!
What makes a man masculine—and when did looking masculine become evidence that a man is holy?
After a one-star review accused us of promoting “feminized Christianity,” we decided to talk about it. We unpack the rise of “muscular Christianity,” the caricatures of Catholic masculinity online, and why strength, discipline, lifting weights, leadership, and doing hard things are good—but aren’t the same thing as holiness.
More importantly, we talk about what marriage and fatherhood eventually demand from a man: sacrifice, humility, emotional maturity, prayer, surrender to God, and the ability to carry burdens that can’t be lifted in a weight room.
In this episode:
• “Feminized Christianity” vs. muscular Christianity
• Why masculine appearance isn’t the same as virtue
• What marriage actually requires from men
• Discipline, athletics, and self-mastery
• Masculinity as integration rather than performance
• Why fatherhood requires more than toughness
📕Coming January: The Quest for the Male Soul: https://link.amazon/B09nC5MaL
Chapters
00:00 — We Got a One-Star Review
 02:04 — What Does a “Masculine Christian” Look Like?
 05:14 — What Is “Feminized Christianity”?
 07:50 — What Marriage Actually Requires From Men
 10:56 — The Return of Muscular Christianity
 14:12 — When Discipline and Strength Become Misordered
 17:05 — Masculinity vs. Masculine Performance
 19:30 — The Illusion of Control
 20:46 — What Actually Forms Good Husbands and Fathers

Support the show
BOOKS, WRITING, AND RESOURCES
📕 Order Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse
https://www.avemariapress.com/products/lovemaking
📕 Pre-Order The Quest For The Male Soul: Discover What Your Life Is For
https://a.co/d/08A9vSRh
Alto from Ascension’s learn more and subscribe to Alto: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Our Merch
https://www.two-become-family-shop.fourthwall.com
✍️ Read our writing on Catholic marriage, family life, communication, intimacy, parenting, and ordinary holiness: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com

🎤 Book Renzo and Monica to speak for your parish, diocese, marriage retreat, conference, or Catholic event: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com/p/book-renzo-and-monica-to-speak-for

🏠 Learn more about Two Become Family: ...

Send us a voicemail to tell us what you think!
What can Blessed Fulton Sheen teach us about marriage today?
Discover Sheen, inspired by his beatification, not just through clips on Instagram. He has more to say! Here are his writings:
Three to Get Married - the essential starting point for his thoughts on the sacrament of marriage: https://a.co/d/0hZ61jqS
Children and Parents - focused more directly on parenthood and the dynamic of family relationships.
Way to Happiness - Sheen’s vision of the Christian life, love, virtue, and happiness.
In honor of his beatification, we’re revisiting some of our favorite wisdom from Fulton Sheen’s Three to Get Married and talking about what it looks like when that wisdom meets actual married and family life.
How do you give yourself to your spouse and children without losing yourself? When does healthy self-care become selfishness? Are our desires and passions themselves bad—or does the problem come from what we do with them? And after years of marriage, kids, schedules, work, and responsibilities, can we still remain fascinated by the person we married?
After 20 years together, some of Sheen’s words hit very differently than they did when we first read them as newlyweds.
We talk about self-gift without self-erasure, keeping our desires rightly ordered, motherhood and fatherhood, and Sheen’s beautiful idea that love flourishes in the ongoing “mystery” of the other person.
Because your spouse isn’t someone you finish figuring out.
Chapters
00:00 — Celebrating Blessed Fulton Sheen
01:12 — Why Three to Get Married Still Matters
01:50 — How Do You Love Yourself Without Being Selfish?
03:22 — Do You Lose Yourself in Marriage and Parenthood?
05:45 — God as the Guardrails for Self-Gift
08:20 — When Self-Care Becomes Self-Indulgence
10:00 — Are Our Passions and Desires Bad?
11:23 — Fulton Sheen’s Clarity About Marriage
13:48 — Knowing Where the Boundaries Are
14:00 — Why Love Needs Mystery
16:05 — Reading Sheen After 20 Years Together
17:37 — When Marriage Becomes All Tasks and Schedules
19:57 — Your Worth Isn’t Based on What You Do
20:44 — “Love Demands Something Unrevealed”

Support the show
BOOKS, WRITING, AND RESOURCES
📕 Order Lovemaking: How to Talk about Sex with Your Spouse
https://www.avemariapress.com/products/lovemaking
📕 Pre-Order The Quest For The Male Soul: Discover What Your Life Is For
https://a.co/d/08A9vSRh
Alto from Ascension’s learn more and subscribe to Alto: https://ascension-press.linkjolt.io/redirect?tc=WfiAGx9e&aff=yiwH1nGSUbss9NbfLPx5K
Our Merch
https://www.two-become-family-shop.fourthwall.com
✍️ Read our writing on Catholic marriage, family life, communication, intimacy, parenting, and ordinary holiness: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com

🎤 Book Renzo and Monica to speak for your parish, diocese, marriage retreat, conference, or Catholic event: https://twobecomefamily.substack.com/p/book-renzo-and-monica-to-speak-for

🏠 Learn more about Two Become Family: ...