Catholics Fight Porn Podcast

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Steve O’Connor welcomes Carol Juergensen Sheets, a licensed clinical social worker and CSAT partner betrayal trauma specialist known for her books Help.Her.Heal and Help.Them.Heal and her ERCEM Early Recovery Couples Empathy Model. Carol explains she entered the field after schools reported children acting out, leading her to IITAP training, then to couples work when she saw betrayed partners in severe trauma. 
She emphasizes reflective listening as the key empathy skill and outlines empathy elements (perspective-taking, recognizing emotions, and nonjudgment). They discuss betrayal trauma phases, truth-telling, and practicing relational skills before deeper exploration, noting recovery and trust rebuilding often take three to five years. Carol shares resources, her upcoming book, Help.Him.Heal, and where to find her courses and work.

00:00 Welcome
00:57 Episode Intro and Padre Pio
02:52 Meet Carol the Coach
04:17 How Carol Entered This Work
07:48 Why Partners Need Healing
09:21 Empathy Skills That Work
11:36 Reflective Listening Practice
14:15 ERCEM Model and Trauma Phases
25:32 Help Him Heal and Male Betrayal
27:14 Head to Heart Mindset Shift
33:21 Where to Find Carol and Closing

📌 RESOURCES & LINKS:
Visit Carol's website to learn more, find her resources, courses, workshops and much more!
Join Finally Free - CFP's group coaching program for Catholic men: catholicsfightporn.com/groups
Book an intro call with Steve: catholicsfightporn.com/introdiscoverycall
Daily CFP Boost texts - text SUPPORT to (941) 279-2337 or visit catholicsfightporn.com/dailytext
The Freedom Letter - a daily email newsletter - sign up at catholicsfightporn.com
Full Disclosure support - Steve and a betrayed partner coach guide couples through the Full Disclosure process. Email Steve for more info: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
Covenant Eyes accountability software - Get 30 days free at covenanteyes.com | Promo code: CFP
Wisephone - a safe, locked-down smartphone that's not a flip phone - techless.com/CFP | Promo code: CFP saves $25
Instagram: @catholicrecovery
If this episode helped you, please leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. It costs you nothing and helps other men find this content when they need it most.

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Steve O’Connor hosts Episode #64 of the Catholics Fight Porn podcast with guest Ellen Drews to discuss the “After Disclosure” phases of the Full Disclosure process: the Partner Impact Statement and the Emotional Restitution Letter. This marks Ellen's 4th appearance on the show.  Check out her other episodes [15, 23, 26].
Framed by recording on the the Memorial of Our Lady of Sorrows, they connect disclosure work to grief, empathy, humility, and restoration. 
Ellen explains why guided disclosure helps break denial, create shared reality, and stabilize safety. 
She outlines what impact letters cover (physical, psychological, financial, spiritual, sexual, social/professional, and family effects), what makes restitution letters effective, suggested timing, and how structured, supported sessions help couples grieve losses and rebuild trust.
Ellen who holds a Master’s in Theology and Pastoral Ministry and is a Certified Partner Coach (APSATS), certified Brainspotting practitioner, ICF-Certified Life Coach, Pastoral Sex Addiction Professional (ITAP), Full Disclosure Guide through Kintsugi Recovery Partners, and an Inner Child Model Recovery Specialist trained through Dr. Eddie Capparucci.

Welcome 
01:09 Our Lady of Sorrows
03:11 Meet Ellen Drews
05:46 Who Ellen Helps
08:09 Three Phases of Healing
11:23 Why Guided Disclosure
13:42 When to Start Impact
20:06 Impact Statement Basics
21:31 Impact Categories Breakdown
27:19 From Pain to a Roadmap
29:54 What Changes After Writing
30:41 Making Space for Pain
31:33 Compassionate Witnessing
31:49 Safe Containment for Truth
34:27 Empathy as a Muscle
35:07 Restitution Letter Guidelines
37:22 Partner Phase Two Healing
41:10 Processing and Sharing Letters
44:45 Humility and Deeper Recovery
46:04 Overcoming Letter Resistance
51:41 United Against Addiction
54:25 Closing
📌 RESOURCES & LINKS:
Visit Ellen's website: www.ellendrews.com and book a Complimentary Consult Call with her to discuss your situation and next steps
Join Finally Free - CFP's group coaching program for Catholic men: catholicsfightporn.com/groups
Book an intro call with Steve: catholicsfightporn.com/introdiscoverycall
Daily CFP Boost texts — text SUPPORT to (941) 279-2337 or visit catholicsfightporn.com/dailytext
The Freedom Letter - a daily email newsletter - sign up at catholicsfightporn.com
Full Disclosure support - Steve and a betrayed partner coach guide couples through the Full Disclosure process. Email Steve for more info: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
Covenant Eyes accountability software - Get 30 days free at covenanteyes.com | Promo code: CFP
Wisephone - a safe, locked-down smartphone that's not a flip phone - techless.com/CFP | Promo code: CFP saves $25
Instagram: @catholicrecovery
If this episode helped you, please leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. It costs you nothing and helps other men find this content when they need it most.

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Episode #63: The Undivided Heart: Catholic Parts Work with Jared Schiemer

Steve O’Connor opens the episode by introducing the saint of the day on recording, St. Clare of Montefalco, and connecting her inward, Christ-centered self-examination to “parts work” as a path to healing. 
He interviews Jared Schiemer, a certified life coach trained in IFS-informed parts work, who explains how he discovered the modality through somatic-based sessions, therapy, and training with IFS founder Dr. Richard Schwartz, describing it as faster and more experiential than traditional talk therapy. 
Jared outlines core IFS concepts (Self and parts such as managers, firefighters, and exiles), emphasizes “No Bad Parts,” and discusses regulation, validation, and meeting needs to reduce shame, compulsions, anger, and relapse risk. 
They address Catholic compatibility through Scripture and Dr. Gerry Crete’s Litanies of the Heart Book and the Souls and Hearts Community, then announce a 16-week Catholic men’s group, The Undivided Heart.

00:00 Welcome 
01:06 Saint Clare Spotlight
02:24 Parts Work Invitation
03:34 Meet Jared Schiemer
05:30 How Jared Found IFS
10:24 What Parts Work Is
17:51 Self Leadership and Needs
21:32 Firefighters and Regulation
25:18 Is IFS Catholic
28:19 The Self and Shame
34:14 Sobriety, Anger + Empathy
39:12 Undivided Heart Program
43:38 Info Night and Closing

FREE INFO SESSION - Monday, August 24 at 8PM ET
Curious about the Undivided Heart Program? Join Steve and Jared for a FREE, live info session on Monday, August 24 at 8PM Eastern. This is your chance to ask questions, get a feel for the work, and find out if this program is the right next step for you. Spots are limited for the group. Email Steve directly to get the Zoom link: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
About Jared Schiemer: Jared Schiemer is a certified Life Coach, trained through the Robbins-Madanes Training Center, with additional training in NLP, Human Needs Psychology, and IFS-informed Parts Work. He is a certified FOCCUS pre-marriage and marriage Facilitator and continues his study of Internal Family Systems through the Souls and Hearts Catholic community and IFS Institute.
He is a graduate of Franciscan University of Steubenville where he obtained a degree in Business Management and a minor in Psychology. At Franciscan, he deepened his Catholic faith, formed lifelong friendships, and strengthened his relationship with his now-wife, Claire, who is also a graduate of Franciscan University and now works as a mental health therapist and coach. He and Claire have been together for over 14 years, since high school, and have been married for the past seven years.
Jared has also walked his own path through Parts Work, in both therapy and coaching, and experienced what it's like to watch emotions and triggers he'd carried for years dissolve rather than just get managed. That's why he does this work, he's not only trained in the method, he's lived what it can do.
Jared brings a steady presence to men doing this work, meeting every part of themselves with curiosity and compassion. His coaching specialty is connection: helping clients reconnect to themselves, to the people they love, and to their God-given purpose.
About the Undivided Heart Program: The Undivided Heart is a 16-week Catholic Parts Work group for men, co-facilitated by Steve O'Connor and Jared Schiemer. It is built for the Catholic man who has tried everything and is ready to go deeper. Rooted in IFS-informed Parts Work and Litanies of the Heart by Dr. Gerry Crete and fully integrated with the Catholic faith, the Undivided Heart helps men identify the wounded parts driving their behavior, build a relationship with those parts and lead with the innermost Self, and experience a kind of freedom that is not white-knuckled but real and tangible.
Starting September 2026. Spots are limited for the group.
To learn more or reserve your spot, email Steve: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
📌 Resources & Links:
Free Info Session - Undivided Heart Program: Monday August 24 at 8PM ET. Email steve@catholicsfightporn.com for the Zoom link
Join Finally Free - CFP's group coaching program for Catholic men: catholicsfightporn.com/groups
Book an intro call with Steve: catholicsfightporn.com/introdiscoverycall
Daily CFP Boost texts — text SUPPORT to (941) 279-2337 or visit catholicsfightporn.com/dailytext
The Freedom Letter - a daily email newsletter - sign up at catholicsfightporn.com
Full Disclosure support - Steve and a betrayed partner coach guide couples through the Full Disclosure process. Email Steve for more info: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
Covenant Eyes accountability software - Get 30 days free at covenanteyes.com | Promo code: CFP
Wisephone - a safe, locked-down smartphone that's not a flip phone - techless.com/CFP | Promo code: CFP saves $25
Instagram: @catholicrecovery
If this episode helped you, please leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. It costs you nothing and helps other men find this content when they need it most.

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Steve O’Connor is Interviewed by Tom Weaver of Come to the Table Ministry.
They discuss emotional sobriety, connection, and an empathy angle related to the 12 Steps.
01:03 Welcome and Retreat Info
03:11 Steve's  Story Recovery and Coaching Story
12:47 Why Empathy Matters
14:09 Sobriety Versus Recovery
19:03 Defensiveness and Patience
22:10 Scripts and Being Prepared
24:19 Connection and AVR Practice
26:40 Daily Check In Calls
27:18 Connection Beats Defensiveness
28:04 12 Steps + Empathy Angle
35:00 Emotional Sobriety Defined
37:52 Call Up Stick With Winners
42:31 Keep Recovery Simple
44:42 Make The Call
47:38 Build Your Recovery Team
HELPFUL LINKS:
Tom + Michele Weaver at Come to the Table Ministries:
-Website here.
-Retreats + Conferences here.
-Their Podcast here.
-Email: info@tableministry.com 
CATHOLICS FIGHT PORN:
-Join an amazing group of men in the Finally Free Group here.
-Get daily, uplifting CFP BOOST Texts by texting SUPPORT to (941) 279-2337
-For 30 days Free of Covenant Eyes, sign up at:  https://www.covenanteyes.com
PROMO CODE: CFP

-Get a sweet, safe, locked-down phone [that's not a flip phone] - Get a Wisephone!  Use Promo Code: CFP to save $25 -- https://www.techless.com/CFP

-Join the Finally Free Coaching Group: https://www.catholicsfightporn.com/need-help

-Book an Intro Discovery Call with Steve: https://www.catholicsfightporn.com/contact

-Email: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
-Sign up for the email newsletter at the bottom left of catholicsfightporn.com

-Connect with me on Instagram @catholicrecovery

-Steve and a betrayed partner coach guide couples through the Full Disclosure process for those looking for full truth in their relationship.  Email Steve for more info.

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What does a sobriety actually look like? In this episode, Steve breaks down the concrete benefits of recovery, not the absence of sin, but the presence of something better. Integrity. Honesty. Hope.  Not living a double life.
One of the greatest and most underrated gifts of sobriety is time spent in a state of grace - sometimes longer than a man has experienced since childhood. 
If you've been wondering whether recovery is real, it is. 
Steve shares some of the many gifts of sobriety and what you actually gain when you quit the behavior.
HELPFUL LINKS:
-Join an amazing group of men in the Finally Free Group here.
-Get daily, uplifting CFP BOOST Texts by texting SUPPORT to (941) 279-2337 or here.
-For 30 days Free of Covenant Eyes, sign up at:  https://www.covenanteyes.com
PROMO CODE: CFP

-Get a sweet, safe, locked-down phone [that's not a flip phone] - Get a Wisephone!  Use Promo Code: CFP to save $25 -- https://www.techless.com/CFP

-Book an INTRO Call with Steve here.

-Email: steve@catholicsfightporn.com
-Sign up for the email newsletter at the bottom left of catholicsfightporn.com

-Connect with me on Instagram @catholicrecovery

-Steve and a betrayed partner coach guide couples through the Full Disclosure process for those looking for full truth in their relationship.  Email Steve for more info.
-Donate to CFP to support this work here.