In this episode, I’m diving into a question I get all the time: Is legal separation the better option for Christian women in emotionally and spiritually abusive marriages? Or is divorce actually the path to healing and wholeness?(Please note: this episode is for Christian women considering a more permanent end to their relationship. If that's not you, give this one a pass for today!)I know how hard it is to navigate these decisions, especially when your faith, your safety, and your identity are all tangled together. I’ve lived it. I’ve wrestled with it. And I’ve coached hundreds of women through it.So I’m walking you through the differences between legal separation and divorce from a biblical, emotional, financial, and psychological perspective without shame, fear tactics, or pressure. Just clarity, truth, and love.What You’ll Learn: What legal separation really involves (hint: it’s not just sleeping in separate rooms)The truth behind “God hates divorce” and what Scripture actually saysHow legal separation can keep you stuck emotionally and financiallyWhy divorce might be the healthiest choice for you and your childrenWhat your church may be getting wrong—and how to respond with courage and graceMy own story of choosing divorce and what changed in my life afterRead the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources:Get a free, practical guide to legal separation and divorce that will help you decide what is best for you.Some more Flying Free Podcast episodes on divorce and separation: “How Do I Know if Divorce Is the Right Choice for Me?” “Will God Punish Me if I Get a Divorce?” “During Separation, How Do I Deal With an Overwhelming Workload and No Support?”
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From Trapped to Free in 30 Days [332]
In this episode, Natalie shares the raw, unfiltered voices of Christian women who took a powerful step toward reclaiming their lives. What begins with deep confusion, spiritual exhaustion, and the belief that “I’m the problem” transforms into clarity, courage, and freedom. This episode is a love letter to every woman who feels stuck in a toxic relationship yet longs for something more.Through the annual Flying Free satisfaction survey, listeners hear dozens of honest, heart-wrenching, and ultimately hopeful testimonies of what healing looks like when women dare to believe they deserve better.Key Takeaways:You are not the problem. Many women enter Flying Free believing they’re broken. The truth? They’re trapped in harmful belief systems—not failures.Healing is possible. Even women who felt suicidal or hopeless now describe themselves as joyful, empowered, and free.You don’t have to do it alone. Community and coaching are a lifeline. The kaleidoscope of women in Flying Free offers safety, connection, and understanding.Transformation isn’t a miracle—it’s a process. One decision at a time, one new belief at a time, one boundary at a time. And it works.Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources:Want to learn more about a tool we use inside the program all the time that literally changes lives? Check out Episode 160 of the Flying Free Podcast.
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Escaping the Man Everyone Admired: Lisa's Story [331]
What happens when the man everyone admires is the one silently destroying your soul behind closed doors?In this gripping episode, I sit down with Lisa: a strong, truth-telling woman who walked through 40 years of emotional and spiritual abuse in her marriage. From the trauma of date rape on her first date, to the covert spiritual manipulation in a seemingly “perfect” Christian home, Lisa vulnerably shares how she survived, how she healed, and how she’s now helping other women rise.This episode is not just a story. It’s a reclamation.Key Takeaways: “You’re not crazy—he just told you that you were.” Lisa unpacks the slow unraveling of decades of covert abuse masked as devotion.How Christian culture kept her trapped in a narrative of self-blame, silence, and “submission.”The pivotal role of trauma-informed therapy, especially EMDR, in unlocking the truth and breaking the trauma bond.Lisa’s experience with betrayal by Christian counselors and the devastating weaponization of Scripture.Why she now calls it an escape—not a divorce.The healing power of boundaries, honest storytelling, and godly anger.What real love looks like after abuse—and yes, it can come at 66.Read the full show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources:Want to listen to some more survivor stories? Check out Erin’s story and Marie’s story.
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1:04:57
Spiritual Abuse, Scapegoating, and the Mask of Virtue [330]
In this episode of The Flying Free Podcast, we’re talking about a book that forever changed my understanding of evil—M. Scott Peck's People of the Lie. This isn't about cartoon villains or obvious monsters. I'm talking about the kind of evil that sits in church pews, leads Bible studies, and goes home to emotionally destroy their families while maintaining a pristine public image.Have you ever felt crazy for questioning someone's "godly" behavior when it leaves you feeling diminished and confused? You're not alone, and you're not imagining things. In this episode, I break down the subtle patterns of evil that hide behind masks of righteousness, especially in Christian contexts.In this powerful episode, you'll discover:• Why the most dangerous form of evil isn't loud or obvious, but subtle, polite, and often dressed in religious language and "concern" for your spiritual wellbeing• How to recognize scapegoating—the psychological process where someone transfers their shame onto you, making you carry the emotional burden for the entire relationship• The chilling reality of how evil people use virtue and spiritual leadership as masks to hide their true nature, and why religious communities often protect the abuser rather than the abused• Practical ways to trust your own perceptions again after years of having your reality denied and twistedIf you've ever been told you're overreacting, too sensitive, or not spiritual enough when trying to address harmful behavior, this episode will validate your experience and give you the language to understand what you've been through.The journey toward freedom begins with recognizing the lies for what they are. Join me as we unpack this transformative book and discover how naming evil is the first step toward reclaiming your life and your truth.Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here Related Resources: Grab your copy of M. Scott Peck's People of the LieWant to check out some other books I recommend? I have a whole laundry list.
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Winning Child Custody & Divorce Battles: Pro Strategies from a Top Attorney [329]
Strap in, ladies. This episode is basically law school meets your best girlfriend telling you how to survive divorce court with a toxic ex who thinks the law is optional and reality is negotiable. I’m joined by Arizona attorney Wendy Hernandez (aka courtroom gladiator and truth-spewer), who unpacks what you really need to know when facing custody battles, financial warfare, and the endless parade of legal shenanigans from an abusive ex.This episode was originally a private workshop inside the Flying Free Kaleidoscope community, and now it's yours, too. You're welcome. (And also, if you want more, jump in with us!)Key Takeaways:How to get out when you're financially trappedWhat temporary orders are and how they can help you immediatelyWhy documentation beats opinions in court, and how to gather it smartlySecrets to dealing with exes who refuse to work or disclose incomeHow to present strong evidence without being overwhelmedLegal options for supervised visitation and protecting your childrenModifying custody when major life changes occurProtecting kids from subtle forms of abuse within court limitationsHow to handle mediators and avoid coerced agreementsSanctioning your ex for using the legal system abusivelyThe emotional encouragement you need when you feel too overwhelmed to fight backRead the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question hereRelated Resources: Wendy’s YouTube channel: Command the CourtroomHer “Best Interests of the Child” checklistThe “Is Love Resilience” worksheet (traits that resilient women develop to rebuild their lives)The “Know Your Rights – Protect. Prepare. Empower. Escape” worksheetOur Day’s co-parenting calendar appAimee Says, an AI app to help you craft response, document abuse, prepare for court, and more Flying Free Podcast Episode 220 with Wendy: Dealing with Fear During DivorceHaving tried over 1,000 cases during her twenty-seven years as a litigator, Wendy is a courtroom warrior who has tackled every type of family law matter — from divorce to child custody and everything in between. Sharing secrets learned from the country’s top law professors at the University of Notre Dame Law School and during her battles on the family law front lines, Wendy is passionate about helping not only her clients, but also those representing themselves, to feel competent, confident and comfortable in the courtroom.
Flying Free is a support resource for women of faith who need hope and healing from hidden emotional abuse, spiritual abuse, and narcissistic abuse. Because of misogynistic theology taught in controlling and spiritually abusive churches, many Christian women find themselves in destructive marriages where there is an uneven power dynamic. Male partners use their status as a husband to gain power and control over a woman’s mind, emotions, body, social life, finances, and more. When she tries to get help from her equally abusive church environment, she is betrayed and re-abused. Flying Free offers a Christ-centered, gospel-oriented perspective on domestic abuse that protects and honors the voices and autonomy of women. Tune in each week to hear conversations with emotional abuse advocates and fellow survivors who will walk with you on your journey up and out. We hear you. You are not alone. Learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com
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