Brown Bag Mornings

The squad hits the Homie Helpline to help a shy future lawyer named Cameron find the "rizz" to talk to a security guard who gave up social media for Lent. They also roast Tiger Woods for flipping his Land Rover in Florida and debate why Jelly Roll was chosen to sing a country song for the official World Cup soundtrack.

[Edited by @iamdyre 📅]

Chapters

(00:00) Chivas!

(1:57) Petty Police: Chilli from TLC's "fat thumb" repost

(7:09) Scrolling: Getting "pressed like juice" in Newport

(9:49) The Weather W/ Concrete!

(13:01) Homie Helpline: Rizzing up Barney's Beanery guard

(42:46) Happy Holy Week!

(43:56) Six Flags Tickets!

(50:11) Don't You Know I'm Local: The $75 refillable Shohei Ohtani cup

(52:09) Chisme: Tiger Woods'' rollover crash and impairment

(56:27) Rap Sheet: Roasting the Jelly Roll World Cup song

(1:00:11) Studious Foo: Chat GPT ranks California as #1 for food

(1:03:55) Play Ball: Arnold Schwarzenegger's secret bodybuilding love child

(1:07:15) Money Moves: 12 tons of Kit Kats stolen in transit

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The crew stages an intervention for Melissa, whose mom is trying to hijack her baby shower guest list while complaining about the "exhausting" task of making ham sandwiches. Between the family drama, the crew roasts the Michigan woman who tried to gaslight a judge during a virtual hearing and investigates why Kim Kardashian is auctioning off her provocative "lawyer outfits" to fund legal services.

[Edited by @iamdyre ⚾]

Chapters

(00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local: Low rider license plate bill

(3:54) Chisme: Tiny responds to 50 Cent

(6:38) Rap Sheet: J Cole's tight jeans rejection

(9:55) Petty Police: Virtual court driving gaslighter

(14:01) Scrolling with the Homies: Chinese dogs "in heat" 

(18:05) The Weather W/ Concrete!

(19:33) Homie Helpline: Melissa's stingy mom drama

(1:00:53) Don't You Know I'm Local: humans raising cubs in suits

(1:04:18) Chisme: Ray J's $6 million settlement

(1:06:52) Money Moves: Kim Kardashian

(1:10:42) Studious Foo: Cold weather heart disease risk

(1:12:28) Play Ball: Ohtani's $4,000 Seiko watch gifts

 

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🎤 The crew reacts to the idea that J. Cole could’ve been part of G-Unit and how different hip-hop might look today. ⚖️ A judge proves you can’t out-petty the system in a hilarious but brutal moment. 📱 We break down how fake “good news” stories keep going viral because people want something positive so bad. 📞 The Homie Helpline gets tense as Melissa considers uninviting her own mom from her baby shower. 🐻 “Don’t You Know I’m Local” delivers a surprisingly sad bear situation that hits the feels. 💰 And Kim K is being called generous… but let’s be real, who’s actually wearing that outfit?

CHAPTERS / TIMESTAMPS:

(00:00) Rapsheet: J. Cole almost joined G-Unit

(03:06) Petty Police: Judge shuts down petty behavior instantly

(07:12) Scrolling: Fake good news stories going viral

(11:15) Homie Helpline: Woman wants to uninvite mom from baby shower

(25:10) Don’t You Know I’m Local: Sad situation involving local bears

(28:34) Money Moves: Kim K’s wild outfit has people questioning everything

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🤖 “Don’t You Know I’m Local” takes us to Whittier, where the robots are apparently… not it. 😬 Things get awkward as Howie Mandel snaps during a tense moment, proving nobody likes being called old. 🎬 A mystery movie teaser has the crew hyped—especially since one of their own might be the star. 🌦️ Concrete Storm checks in with the weather before 📞 the Homie Helpline gets messy with a friend making a very bold weekend request. 😳 Shaq clears the air on his viral DMs, while 💰 Meta and YouTube might finally have to pay up. 🧠 Plus, a simple word that could actually help calm your anxiety.

CHAPTERS / TIMESTAMPS:

(00:00) Don’t You Know I’m Local: Whittier’s questionable robot situation

(04:42) Petty Police: Don’t call old people old—awkward TV moment

(08:05) Scrolling: New movie buzz and a surprise star in the room

(10:42) The Weather with Concrete Storm: Thursday March 26th forecast

(12:06) Homie Helpline: Friend makes a bold and messy relationship request

(20:50) Chismation: Shaq addresses viral DMs to Sabrina Carpenter

(25:27) Money Moves: Meta and YouTube facing major payouts

(29:29) Studious Foo: The one word that could ease anxiety

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The crew attempts to navigate a messy Homie Helpline where a friendship is evolving "like a Pokémon" into a threesome invitation, leading the crew to debate the rules of being a unicorn. Between the relationship drama, the squad roasts Shaq for his supposedly "AI-generated" leaked DMs to Sabrina Carpenter and investigates why Whittier is using "Wall-E" robots to scan for sidewalk cracks.

[Edited by @iamdyre 👁️]

Chapters

(00:00) Don't You Know I'm Local: Whittier's sidewalk scanning robots

(4:48) Chisme: Cardi B's booty reduction backpedal

(7:45) Petty Police: Howie Mandel's grumpy 70th birthday

(11:12) Scrolling: Concrete's 'Chairman' movie trailer debut

(13:48) The Weather W/ Concrete!

(15:13) Elysian Park W/ Greg!

(17:07) Homie Helpline: Tammy's friendship-to-threesome dilemma

(43:24) Elysian Park update

(53:40) Ye Tix!

(55:12) Chisme: Shaq's freaky Sabrina Carpenter DM's

(59:53) Don't You Know I'm Local: Greg @ Elysian Park

(1:02:30) Money Moves: app addiction

(1:06:31) Studious Foo: texting "okie" to calm anxiety

(1:09:41) Play Ball: Luka breaks Kobe's Laker records

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