Pure Desire Podcast

In this episode of the Pure Desire Podcast, we dive into the essential topic of emotional stability and its role in recovery, relationships, and personal growth. We explore how to assess whether we are managing our emotions or being managed by them, and why there are no inherently “good” or “bad” emotions. 

Emotions are powerful indicators of deeper realities and can reveal patterns that lead to relapse if left unchecked. Our guest, Heather Kolb, shares practical strategies for slowing down, analyzing emotional triggers, and reshaping patterns connected to fear, anger, loneliness, or rejection. 

We also discuss habits to cultivate emotional resilience, ways to support loved ones without taking responsibility for their feelings, and recommended resources for deepening emotional health. This episode equips listeners to engage their emotions with awareness, understanding, and stability.

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The Body Keeps The Score

Emotional Intelligence 

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In today’s episode, we explore what it truly means to pursue a “porn-proof life” from a Christian perspective—beyond willpower, rules, or fear-based accountability. We discuss why many Christians turn to pornography or other compulsive behaviors in moments of pain, stress, or loneliness, and how these coping mechanisms distort God’s design for comfort, connection, and desire.

Our guests, Matthew and Joanna Raabsmith, offer practical guidance for recognizing the root trauma or past pain driving these behaviors, as well as ways betrayed partners can understand how old wounds may be triggered. We explore healthy approaches to processing life’s inevitable pain, building resilience as individuals and couples, and strengthening intimacy through the Intimacy Pyramid—starting with honesty and safety—to navigate challenges and grow closer together in trust, healing, and authentic connection.

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In today’s episode, we dive into one of the most tender and complex challenges couples face after betrayal: rebuilding trust that lasts. Even when sobriety is sustained and growth is evident, many spouses still feel the hidden fear that the “other shoe” will eventually drop. Our guests, Tyler and Shari Chinchen, help us unpack why trust can remain fragile, what behaviors—often unintentional—can quietly undo months of healing, and how couples can avoid these subtle pitfalls. We’ll explore the markers of thriving couples who have restored trust over time and what practices consistently set them up for long-term stability. We also address two difficult but common experiences: when the recovering spouse feels they’ve rebuilt more than their partner recognizes, and when betrayal happens again after meaningful progress. Lastly, we discuss why trust must be rebuilt in every area of marriage, the role of group support, and what to do when trust gets stuck despite years of effort.

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On today’s episode, Nate and Maggie Blaylock share their expertise in helping couples navigate recovery, with a special focus on rebuilding physical intimacy after betrayal. They discuss common mistakes couples make in this area and provide examples of what can go wrong, as well as the traits of couples who successfully restore trust and connection in their sexual relationship. 

The conversation explores how spouses can create a safe, supportive environment for renewed intimacy, communicate boundaries or discomfort effectively, and have constructive conversations about sex without shame or pressure. Nate and Maggie also address shifting expectations, acknowledging that physical intimacy may look different than before discovery, and offer guidance for couples who feel stuck even years into recovery. 

Listeners will gain practical tools and encouragement for fostering openness, safety, and connection, with insights for cultivating a physical relationship that is not only healthy but potentially even richer than before betrayal.

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Nate & Maggie's Website

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Carol Jurgensen Sheets joins us again to explore the vital role of empathy in healing relationships affected by addiction or compulsive sexual behavior. She begins by defining empathy and explaining why it’s essential for rebuilding trust and connection after discovery. Carol also discusses why many addicts struggle with empathy, often due to past modeling or coping patterns, and offers practical guidance for learning this skill even when it feels unfamiliar. We cover strategies for communicating needs as a spouse or family member, navigating situations where the recovering partner may struggle to respond empathetically, and maintaining empathy beyond recovery to enrich all relationships. Carol shares concrete steps listeners can take this week or month to practice and strengthen empathy, emphasizing that it’s a skill that can grow with intention, reflection, and accountability. The episode closes with encouragement for making empathy a consistent, transformative part of life and recovery.

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GET STARTED
Summit 2026!: Register Now
Free eBook: 7 Keys To Understanding Betrayal Trauma
Free eBook: 5 Steps to Freedom From Porn
Schedule Your Free 15-Minute Counseling Consultation
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