The Parenting Reframe

• Building Your Kids' Tolerance for Frustration

  In today’s solo episode, I’m answering your questions about how to ensure we don’t raise entitled kids. This is an important question that many of you have asked me on all my platforms. Being entitled can be a very triggering thing for a lot of parents, especially those that grew up without a lot of wealth. We want to teach our kids a sense of gratitude and caring for others. What it really comes down to is teaching kids the ability to tolerate frustration and deal with an outcome they don’t want. I’m sharing three things you can do at home to help build a tolerance for frustration.Gain the ability to waitWaiting will elicit frustration in kids, but if they want it badly enough, they will wait it out.How often do we quickly accommodate simple tasks for our child when we could weave in a wait time?By doing this, we are delaying gratification.Play a game with your childMake sure you go first and they go second.Find the longest amount of time they can wait, and then allow them to take their turn. Meet them where they’re at no matter how short the amount of time they can wait is.Let them struggle through a taskKids will often feign an ability to do something on their own even though they’re capable.The whining that happens with a task they don’t want to do is because they can’t tolerate the frustration of struggling with a task.Encourage them to keep trying, assuming you have the time.Resources: Paid Substack Community - https://albiona.substack.com/Schedule a free call about my 1:1 coaching, Reclaim Your Calm - https://stan.store/theparentingreframe/p/free-discovery-call-ck6qfBe sure to sign up for my Substack newsletter for longer and more specialized parenting content: https://albiona.substack.com/ I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/Follow me on TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@theparentingreframe 

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• In Case You Were Wondering: The Creative Process

  I get asked all the time about creating content and writing. In this video, I share a few tips on where to start if you don’t consider yourself creative, as well as the three books that changed the way I approach creativity, vulnerability, and fear.Here are the three books I mentioned:The Tools and True and False Magic. The Tools is by Phil Stutz and Barry Michels, and True and False Magic is written by Phil Stutz and Elise Loehnen (I spoke with Elise about this book on the podcast; you can listen here).Awaken Your Genius by Ozan Varol (He is one of my favorite writers)The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron (Morning pages changed my life) If the messages I’m sharing in this series resonate with you, I’d like to dive deeper to help you break free from what's holding you back.My transformation sessions are designed to help you move through fear, release blocks, and embrace change, guiding you to unleash the greatest version of yourself. Through a unique inner-parenting approach, you'll gain the tools to navigate any adversity.Email me at [email protected] to start your transformative journey.

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• Beyond 'Good' or 'Bad': The 3 Parental Reaction Blueprints

  In this quick solo episode, I’m talking about a newsletter I wrote on Substack about reaction types. There are many different ways parents can react when their child becomes dysregulated, pushes against a boundary they have set, or throws a tantrum. Many of these reactions are rooted in the ways we were raised by our parents or the experiences we had as we grew up. Today, I’m going to talk about the three reaction types I encounter most frequently during my coaching with parents and working with families, and I'll also provide a bonus reaction type at the end of the episode.1. Hyper-Reactor or the Punisher The parent who will go from zero to 100 instantly and doesn’t have the tools to regulate themselves.They feel discomfort because of their child’s reaction to something they don’t like. This may be rooted in an association from their own childhood, where they didn’t feel safe expressing their own emotions. Sometimes this can feel like the child is being disrespectful to the parent. 2. Panicked ParentThe parent who knows to control their big emotions around their child who is struggling but they are terribly uncomfortable with the situation.This parent over explains the boundary or tries to justify the decision or offer other choices to make the situation better.This isn’t perceived as a good thing by the dysregulated child, it just feels like more input and they cannot tolerate it. 3. The AdjustorThe parent who is an overthinker and is second guessing their boundaries all the time.When they go to hold a boundary and their child pushes back against it, they make adjustments to their boundary to avoid or stop dysregulation. This is a band aid approach to parenting because it doesn’t teach kids how to tolerate frustration. Bonus Type: Avoidant ParentThe parent who doesn’t have a hard time staying calm, but struggles so much to set a boundary, and avoids it at all costs. They are eggshell parenting and have crafted a perfect environment so their kids don’t have to experience any sort of hardship. Avoidant parents shut down when their kids become dysregulated.Resources: Substack newsletter - Beyond ‘Good’ or ‘Bad’: The 3 Parental Reaction Blueprints: https://albiona.substack.com/p/beyond-good-or-bad-the-3-parentalPARR Workshop: https://stan.store/theparentingreframe/parrworkshopBe sure to sign up for my Substack newsletter for longer and more specialized parenting content: https://albiona.substack.com/ I hope you found this episode helpful; for more parenting tips, check out my website and blog for more information. https://theparentingreframe.com/Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe/Follow me on TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@theparentingreframe 

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• In Case You Were Wondering: How I Process Fear

  In the first video of my series, In Case You Were Wondering (This is a video series where I share wisdom and answer the questions I get that aren’t directly related to parenting), I’m tackling the first question most of you ask me: How do you move through fear?In this 6-minute video, I will help you shift from a fear-based mindset to welcoming more faith and trust into your process. What I cover:Growing an audience on social media when it feels dauntingAddressing limiting beliefsMaking career pivotsTaking ChancesMy two-step process for choosing faith over fearEnjoy, and feel free to leave a comment or share it with a friend.

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• A Conversation with Elise Loehnen

  Today on the podcast I’m welcoming back New York Times Bestselling Author Elise Loehnen. If you haven’t listened to the first episode where Elise was on The Parenting Reframe Podcast, it gives a great overview and conversation about her first book, On Our Best Behavior. You can listen to it here: https://theparentingreframe.simplecast.com/episodes/on-our-best-behavior-with-elise-loehnenElise is the author of On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and The Price Women Pay to Be Good, True and False Magic, a collaboration with Phil Stutz, and her workbook coming out soon, Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness. There are so many things we talk about in this episode from the creative process to parenting, the social context of her books to the ways women feel in their own bodies, and so much more. It’s always a pleasure to talk with Elise and get her perspective on so many different topics.Here’s what we talk about with Elise: Elise’s writing processes and how she uncovers societal norms and expectations through her work.An overview of her book On Our Best Behavior and how society forces women to be inherently good through the lens of the seven deadly sins. Her companion workbook Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness and how it helps individuals work through their own beliefs and change the negative narratives. How the stories you tell about yourself are almost always rooted in lack. What we can learn about compassion and patience from neurodivergent children.Recognizing as parents we need to relinquish control over our children and be a safe place for them to land. Letting go of micromanaging our kids to allow them to develop their own roadmap to reach their goals.The amount of energy and self monitoring it takes to stay a certain size or weight as a woman and the mental toll it takes over time. An overview of True and False Magic and how life is an ongoing evolution of feelings and emotions to work through.Resources: Elise’s first Parenting Reframe podcast episode: https://theparentingreframe.simplecast.com/episodes/on-our-best-behavior-with-elise-loehnenElise’s podcast, “Pulling the Thread”: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/pulling-the-thread-with-elise-loehnen/id1585015034On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and The Price Women Pay to Be Good: https://www.eliseloehnen.com/onourbestbehaviorTrue and False Magic: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/778182/true-and-false-magic-by-phil-stutz-with-elise-loehnen/Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/771811/choosing-wholeness-over-goodness-by-elise-loehnen-and-courtney-smith/ For more insight into parenting in today’s world, be sure to subscribe to my Substack: https://www.albiona.substack.comAnd be sure to follow me on TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@theparentingreframe and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/theparentingreframe for more parenting tips and advice.

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