The Catholic Man Show

Dave is back from northern Michigan, and reality is terrible. The family cabin—built by a relative generations ago—delivered everything Tulsa could not: low-80s afternoons, cool nights, fires, golf, and a lake smooth enough for water skiing.
Dave’s three oldest girls all learned to ski, which meant it was time for their seasoned-skier father to show them how it’s done. The only problem was the pontoon boat. It had enough power to pull the kids, but not quite enough to launch a grown man from a shallow-water slalom start. After several attempts and several falls in front of his daughters, Dave accepted the indignity of starting on two skis and kicking one off. His father’s old rule—“In this family, we don’t fall”—was not enforced.
The pour is Celestial Hazy IPA from Chainsaw Brewing, an overtly Catholic brewery in Richland, Washington. Adam has the Dominions can; Dave has the Thrones. Same beer, different celestial artwork, 6.5% ABV, and Revelation-level labels covered in angels, eyes, and hops. If you want a good IPA from a Catholic brewer, support Chainsaw Brewing and help them #BeerEvangelize.
Sponsor: Select International Tours
When Adam and Dave decided to lead their first pilgrimage, the same recommendation kept coming back: Select International Tours. Having traveled with them, the guys can attest that they’re excellent. Whether you want to lead a pilgrimage or join one, visit selectinternationaltours.com and see where they can take you.
Sponsor: The Amen app
Sunday morning is not exactly easy like Sunday morning when you’re trying to load a Catholic family into the van and beat Father down the aisle. The free Amen app helps the guys prepare their children for Mass by listening to the Sunday Gospel on the drive. It also includes Catholic classics like Divine Mercy in My Soul and True Devotion to Mary. No paywall, subscription, or upfront cost. Download the Amen app and help get it from 950,000 downloads to one million.
The prayer request is Mary. She recently had surgery to place a G-tube, which should make feeding more comfortable and eliminate the constant gagging caused by the tube in her mouth. The immediate goals are to stabilize her, wean her from oxygen, and help her continue gaining weight so heart surgery can be considered in the coming months. A recent video caught her wide awake, smiling, and full of joy in the middle of a life that has involved more struggle than most. Keep Mary, Lady Haylee, and the whole family in your prayers.
The Catholic Man Show Campout is also approaching. Registration should open near the end of August, with the campout taking place during the final weekend of September at Clear Creek Abbey. Brandon Sheard will return for a hands-on animal-butchering class, with foraging and woodworking also planned. Those experiences are valuable, but the heart of the weekend is the opportunity to pray with the Benedictine monks and step into the ordered rhythm of monastic life.
Then the guys turn to the theological virtue of hope—the virtue a man in heaven no longer needs and a man in hell can no longer possess. Hope belongs to the man in the middle, the wayfarer who has not yet arrived. That means every one of us.
Drawing from St. Thomas Aquinas, they explain the four marks of hope’s object: it must be good, future, arduous, and possible. Theological hope is not the same as hoping for good weather or a Cowboys Super Bowl. Natural hope rests on circumstances, probabilities, and human ability. Supernatural hope rests on God’s goodness, providence, and promises. Its ultimate object is not a better job, a healed body, or a trouble-free life. Its object is God Himself.
That is why hope is “cashed in” when a soul reaches heaven. The good is no longer future; it is possessed. Souls in purgatory still have hope because the happiness they await remains future, arduous, and possible—even though their final destination is certain.
Josef Pieper helps identify the two ways a man can abandon the road before reaching its end: despair and presumption. Despair decides the promise will not be fulfilled. Presumption decides the reward is already guaranteed without repentance, conversion, or cooperation with grace. Both seize the verdict before the journey is finished.
Presumption is not too much trust in God. It is too little. It imagines a God too small to care about justice, transformation, and whether we become the men He created us to be. Despair makes a similar mistake by deciding that God’s mercy may exist in general but cannot reach this sin, this failure, or this man.
The deeper question is whether we actually trust God. Will He make us happy, or will surrendering to Him leave us regretting what we gave up? We repeatedly hang the weight of our hope on hooks that cannot bear it: a spouse, career, reputation, new client, new car, food, drink, or entertainment. Those things may be good, but none can carry the full weight of the human heart. Only Christ can do that.
St. Francis de Sales brings the discussion into moments of panic, temptation, self-loathing, and spiritual dryness. Devotion is not a feeling of sweetness or consolation. It is a firm and active will to do what pleases God. When anxiety hits, do not make major decisions from agitation. A trapped bird only tightens the net by thrashing. Let the water settle, then move.
Self-contempt is not humility either. Anger at yourself can be another form of pride because it still assumes you should have been able to save yourself. The better response to sin is quiet displeasure followed by courageous amendment: “Poor heart, rise up again bravely.” Hope allows a man to admit that he is nothing on his own while remembering the immense dignity God gave him through baptism.
Spiritual dryness can also teach. If prayer tastes like nothing, examine what you have been eating. Screens, alcohol, entertainment, comfort, and constant stimulation can train the appetite to find spiritual goods tasteless. Keep praying without demanding an immediate emotional reward. Sometimes hope looks like doing the next faithful thing while feeling nothing at all.
Dave shares a moment from adoration when he admitted that he was afraid God would ask him to leave a successful career and live in poverty through full-time ministry. His yes was reluctant, but it was still a yes. The answer he sensed was simple: “I just wanted your yes.” Years later, professional success has brought the same temptation back in a different form—the temptation to believe he can provide for himself and no longer needs to depend on God. Surrender is not something a man completes once. God keeps saying: do it again.
The practical path is equally simple. Offer the trial already in front of you. Pray for an increase in hope. Pray the Rosary even when you do not feel like it. Make an act of gratitude when despair begins closing in. And stop demanding that this life provide what only the next life can give.
We are on the Lord’s team—the winning side. Raise your glass.

Dave's summer vacation got cut from three months down to two, and Adam has a theory. New baby, plus he hasn't been working near as hard. Dave tried to get a second opinion from Anthony Fauci, who invoked the Fifth on advice of counsel, so we're left with the ruling as it stands. Either way, the new van is getting loaded and the Niles family is headed to a cabin in Michigan for two weeks. Fifties at night, fires in the morning and the evening, which means chopping enough firewood to replace what you burn. Golf, swimming, and a little aluminum fishing boat that Davey gets to ride in. Joseph and Joshua stay on shore. Joseph has a big knot on his head at the moment anyway.
Sponsor: Amen app (from the Augustine Institute) Sunday morning in a Catholic family is not easy like Sunday morning. It's kids in the van, beat Father down the aisle, get to the pew. The Amen app is how the guys prepare their kids to receive the Gospel before Mass even starts, plus free access to Divine Mercy in My Soul and True Devotion to Mary. Since 2021 it's hit 950,000 downloads. Let's get them to a million. No paywall, no subscription, no upfront cost. Download the Amen app right now.
Sponsor: Select International Tours When Adam and Dave went looking for help leading their first pilgrimage, every single person pointed them to Select International Tours. Having used them, the guys can vouch. Wherever in the world you want to go, head to selectinternationaltours.com and see what they have ready.
On the drive back from Lady Pamela's family reunion in Arkansas, Dave counted three mopeds inside 45 minutes, which would be unremarkable in Portland and is deeply strange here. A moped gang remains unconfirmed but would be extremely cool. His reading time is going to Plato's Republic with the group at Deacon Harrison's house, book 10 now, while Adam has missed it all year and is on record that he'll haunt them if they kick him out.
Dave also saw the new Odyssey movie, alongside Dr. Frank Grabowski, Juan in a dog onesie as Argos, and Deacon Harrison Garlick, who announced in the group text beforehand: "I have filled my heart with hate." Verdict, 7.5 for entertainment. They shouldn't have tried to cram the whole epic into one film, they changed the ending, which you can't do, and they folded the lotus eaters into Calypso's island. That last one guts the most important choice in the story. Odysseus rejects immortality for his family. That's the whole thing.
The pour is Stranahan's Colorado Whiskey, the flagship, from a bottle the distiller sent the guys when the show started and that has sat on the shelf about ten years since. The label reads: Warning, contains high levels of manliness. No age statement, and no, ten years in your house doesn't count. Whiskey only ages in the barrel. Small batch, four barleys, virgin charred American white oak. Not bourbon, not 51% corn. Made in the style of Scotch, right here in America.
Then the topic: the five precepts of the Church, Catechism 2041, page 548 if you've got the classic 90s edition. This is the Church flexing authority, which she rarely does. Most of what she does is defensive. Papal infallibility is a negative power, not a positive one. The precepts are different. They bind, and they're the floor, not the ceiling.
Attend Mass on Sundays and holy days, and rest from servile labor. Everybody knows the first half. The second half is the one that stings, because going out to eat after Mass means you're compelling somebody else to work. Nurses show up, gas stations stay open, and nobody needs to be demolished by guilt over a trip to the store. Don't be a Pharisee about it. Do take it seriously.
Confess your sins at least once a year, meaning your mortal sins. Go monthly anyway, and do a daily examination of conscience, because you can't remember what you ate two days ago, much less where you lost your temper 28 days ago. Dave prays to Our Lady on the way in: help me make this confession as if it were my last. Adam leaves his phone outside, because it's listening, and that's not a conspiracy. And if you deliberately hold a mortal sin back, the confession is invalid and you've just added to the pile. Compound interest is powerful. Compound sin is worse.
Receive the Eucharist at least during the Easter season. Observe the days of fasting and abstinence, which used to be far heavier, and nothing is stopping you from going heavier now. Adam has never once enjoyed fasting. Dave eats nothing until dinner and swears he thinks more clearly for it. Both of them fast every Wednesday with a group of men and offer it up for their wives and their families. That's the domestic priesthood doing what it's for.
And help provide for the needs of the Church. Notice it doesn't say if you can afford it. Money is the easy part. Time is the sacrifice, especially in the seasons of fatherhood when there isn't any. Fr. Brian O'Brien's answer when somebody says the church really ought to do this: "I totally agree. You should do it." Your kids need to see you make some of your time sacred, not because nothing else was asking for it, but because you told everything else no.
It all lands on stewardship. You don't owe God 10%. You owe Him 100%. The house, the money, the hours, and most of all the kids were never yours, and He's going to want all of it back. Adam is honest about where that gets hard: leaving work drained, walking in the door, wanting to shut down instead of engage. The fix isn't willpower. It's routine. A liturgy of the home. Because those minutes belong to Him too, and at judgment there won't be a single moment that goes unjudged.
One housekeeping note. The Camp Out is always the last weekend of September, so put it on the calendar now. Sign-ups open at the end of August, late on purpose, because opening early means people sign up and don't come, and space is limited. Patrons still come free. This year the guys will be asking for donations on site, because Patreon numbers are down and 100% of what comes in goes straight back into the show. Neither of them takes an income from it.
Protect what you were given. Provide more than the minimum. Establish a house that looks like the King is coming back for it. Raise your glass.
TOPICS COVERED
Dave's summer vacation demoted from three months to two, with Fauci pleading the Fifth on the science
Two weeks at a Michigan cabin, chopping firewood to replace what you burn, and a little aluminum fishing boat
15,000 miles on a brand new van because Oklahoma City is a multiple-times-a-week trip
Three mopeds in 45 minutes in Arkansas, and the unconfirmed existence of a moped gang
Reading Plato's Republic with the group at Deacon Harrison's, book 10, and Adam's threat to haunt them if he gets kicked out
The new Odyssey movie reviewed: Juan in a dog onesie as Argos and Harrison Garlick arriving with his heart pre-filled with hate
Why folding the lotus eaters into Calypso's island wrecks the most important choice in the story
Whiskey of the week: Stranahan's Colorado Whiskey, on the shelf ten years, "warning, contains high levels of manliness"
Why an age statement stops the day it's bottled, because whiskey only ages in the barrel
What makes Stranahan's American whiskey and not bourbon: four barleys, virgin charred American white oak, made in the style of Scotch
Bringing back the old show warning, sporadically and without notice
The five precepts of the Church, Catechism 2041, and why they're the floor and not the ceiling
Papal infallibility as a negative, defensive power versus the precepts as the Church flexing positive authority
Why the Church legislates as little as possible and prefers freedom from the law over obedience to it
Resting from servile labor: the case against going out to eat after Mass, and why nurses and gas stations are fine
St. John Chrysostom on why you cannot pray at home the way you pray in church
Confessing mortal sins at least once a year, and why monthly confession is the better habit
The daily examination of conscience as the thing that makes confession possible at all
Dave's prayer to Our Lady walking into the confessional: make this confession as if it were my last
Why Adam leaves his phone outside the confessional
St. Alphonsus Liguori on concealing sin, and why an intentionally incomplete confession is invalid and grave matter
The Easter duty and St. Thomas Aquinas on why the Eucharist completes what baptism begins
Aquinas's threefold purpose of fasting, and why the second reason is the most interesting one
St. Basil the Great: fasting as a weapon for the valiant and a gymnasium for athletes
Fasting every Wednesday with a group of men and offering it up for your wife and family
Providing for the needs of the Church with time, not just money, and Fr. Brian O'Brien's "you should do it"
Why churches were built with a piazza out front, and what that says about community
Stewardship: you don't owe God 10%, you owe Him 100%, and He wants your kids back
"It's the King's house" as a reason to actually take care of what you have
Coming home mentally exhausted and shutting down instead of engaging, and why routine beats willpower
The liturgy of the home: building routines so a weak will has somewhere to fall
Catholic Man Show Camp Out: always the last weekend of September, sign-ups open at the end of August

REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE
Books &...

We had a guest walk in with gooey butter bars, so you already know it was a good night. Deacon Michael Halbrook is back, his fourth trip to Tulsa (one more and Dave's putting him in a green jacket), and Lady Pamela's baking came with him. Adam's oldest, Luke, was in studio too, which almost never happens, because mom was away and there were no rules. Luke's been out most nights hunting the raccoon that's been picking off the family chickens. No kill yet. But he knows what he's after now, and that's half the hunt.
This week's pour was fitting: Hazel Baker Kentucky Straight Bourbon, six years old, bottled-in-bond at 100 proof, family owned out of Louisville. It came from a barrel the dads at Father McGivney Catholic High School picked out in Kentucky. Full strength, real caramel, nothing watered down.
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This episode is brought to you by the Amen app from the Augustine Institute, the free app Adam's family uses to pray the Sunday readings on the way to Mass. No paywall, no subscription trap, just Scripture, prayer, and audiobooks like Divine Mercy in My Soul and True Devotion. And by Select International Tours, the group Adam and Dave trust for pilgrimages. Whether you want to lead one or join one, that's who you call.
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Then it got serious. Michael spent 18 years in corporate tech and walked away from it to build something for the Church. Not on a whim. He built it nights and weekends for years while the paycheck was still coming, took the business plan to his wife and sons like a board of directors, and only leapt when the runway made sense. But the moment that broke him open happened kneeling in the back pew before Mass. He asked our Lord for the certainty he could keep providing for his family, and he heard back, unmistakably: You've never been the one who provided. I've always been the one who provided.
That's the whole episode in one line.
Bishop Paprocki gave him the order of operations: pray for clarity first, then courage. Most men flip it and go charging into the dark. Michael talks through the discipline of saying no to good things so you can say yes to the right one, and then walks us through what he built, the &Altar app from Domus Formation. One reading, five minutes, a launch pad for your holy hour instead of a replacement for it. Pray, fast, give. A track for every season of life: the man, the woman, the family, the teen, the young adult, the elder.
The back half is fatherhood. Michael's second son, Matthew, is at Air Force basic training right now (pray for him), and Michael's living the Establish pillar in real time. Protect and Provide, most of us understand. Establishing a son (raising him to walk on his own, then actually letting him go) is the hard one. They get into the father wound, the men who never had an example to copy, and the way out: be a good husband first and the father will follow. Because the office of father never ends, and neither do your prayers for your kids.
Raise your glass.
Topics covered in this episode:
Deacon Michael Halbrook's fourth visit, Lady Pamela's gooey butter bars, and Luke's ongoing raccoon hunt
Hazel Baker Kentucky Straight Bourbon, a bottled-in-bond barrel pick from Father McGivney Catholic High School
Leaving 18 years in corporate tech to build a ministry, without doing it recklessly
Building the thing on nights and weekends while the secure paycheck was still coming
Taking the business plan to your wife and kids and making them the board
The back-pew moment: "You've never been the one who provided. I've always been the one who provided."
Bishop Paprocki's rule: pray for clarity first, courage second, and why men flip the order
Why success is more about saying no than saying yes, and the hundred failures you never see behind the one win
Charlie Kirk's seven things and the discipline of a short list
What the &Altar app actually is: five minutes to seed a holy hour, not to replace it
Pray, fast, give, and tracks for the man, woman, family, teen, young adult, and elder
Liturgical living: letting the Mass form the home instead of the other way around
Matthew at Air Force basic training and learning to let a son go
Protect, Provide, and the hard third pillar: Establish
The father wound, and the men trying to be good dads with no example to copy
Be a good husband first, and the father will follow
Why the office of fatherhood, and your prayers for your children, never expire

Referenced in this episode:
Deacon Michael Halbrook: permanent deacon, Diocese of Springfield in Illinois; founder of Domus Formation
Domus Formation: https://wearedomus.com/
&Altar app: https://andaltar.wearedomus.com/
Bishop Thomas Paprocki, Diocese of Springfield in Illinois
Bishop David Konderla, Diocese of Tulsa ("two moments in a Catholic's life: at Mass, and getting back to Mass")
Hazel Baker Kentucky Straight Bourbon: bottled-in-bond, Louisville, KY
Father McGivney Catholic High School barrel selection program
Charlie Kirk, on the discipline of focusing on a short list
Maria von Trapp, early writer on liturgical living
Amen app (Augustine Institute): Divine Mercy in My Soul by St. Maria Faustina; True Devotion to Mary by St. Louis de Montfort

Adam's about to be Coweta's biggest celebrity. Porter and Prairie Farm's SEO game has worked so well that a Tulsa news station called wanting an interview about egg prices and how they're crushing family farms. Problem is, Adam has no idea what egg prices are doing anywhere else. He just knows what he charges, and that they've lost 35 chickens in two weeks. Lady Haylee, in her prudence, said maybe skip the interview. Adam already said yes. The real debate of the week: overalls or no overalls for the camera. Overalls, obviously. Carhartt, not blue jean, collared shirt underneath. Now both guys want branded farm overalls, Niles Ranch and Fecundity Farm for Dave, Porter and Prairie Family Farm for Adam.
Sponsor: Amen app (from the Augustine Institute) The Amen app is the free Catholic prayer app the guys use to walk through the Sunday Gospel with their kids on the way to Mass, plus free access to classics like Divine Mercy in My Soul and True Devotion to Mary. No paywall, no subscription trap. Download the Amen app right now.
Sponsor: Select International Tours When Adam and Dave planned their first pilgrimage, Select International Tours is who everyone pointed them to, and having used them, the guys can vouch for it. Wherever you want to go, head to selectinternationaltours.com and see what they offer.
Dave's week wasn't any calmer. He harvested and shucked 500 to 700 ears of corn with the whole family, then blanched all of it late into the night while Lady Pamela held down a house full of unexpected company. His exact line on the way out the door: "I gotta go drink with my buddy for Jesus. It's a ministry, babe." Piglets are due any day, and this time he's praying they're born alive.
The pour is a revisit: Salterra 14-Year Single Malt Scotch, finished in an Oloroso barrel, 48% ABV. Warm, not hot. Worth going back to.
The prayer request is Mary. She's got an eye procedure Thursday, lasers, to make sure her retina stays attached so she doesn't go blind. She needs to put on weight first. Some days she gains 70 grams, some days she loses it. Thank you for praying. Keep it up.
Then the real topic: what actually happens to your soul between the moment you die and the resurrection of your body. Can fire really burn something with no body to burn? Pulling from Aquinas's Summa, the guys walk through it. Your body dies, your soul doesn't, and it faces judgment immediately, heaven, hell, or purgatory on the way to heaven. The senses go dark since they run through bodily organs, but the intellect and the will, the parts that never needed a body to operate, stay fully awake. Aquinas's answer to the fire question: it doesn't burn the soul like a stove burns wood. It binds it. In sin, you subjected your higher self to a lower appetite, so in justice, a lower thing, fire, now holds your higher self captive. It's God's instrument, not chemistry.
Then the bonus round: limbo. The limbo of the fathers, emptied by Christ at the Harrowing of Hell. The limbo of infants, never defined as dogma, still debated, and Dave's new coinage for where he thinks it actually belongs: limburgatory. A place with no suffering doesn't belong bolted onto hell.
Protect what you love. Provide the truth even when it costs you something. Establish your kids in what's actually at stake. Raise your glass.
TOPICS COVERED
Porter and Prairie Farm's SEO play working so well a Tulsa news station wants an egg price interview
Losing 35 chickens in two weeks and having zero idea what egg prices are doing anywhere else
The overalls debate: Carhartt over blue jean, collared shirt, and the case for branded farm overalls
The economics of homesteading: it only "pays for itself" if you value your own labor at zero
Dave shucking and blanching 500 to 700 ears of corn with the whole family in one night
"I gotta go drink with my buddy for Jesus, it's a ministry, babe"
Piglets due any day and praying for a better outcome than last time
Bourbon of the week: revisiting Salterra 14-Year Single Malt Scotch, Oloroso barrel finish, 48% ABV
Prayer update on baby Mary: a Thursday laser eye procedure to protect her retina, and the fight to gain weight
What actually happens to the soul between death and the resurrection of the body
Matthew 25:41 and what "everlasting fire" could mean for a devil who has no body to burn
The difference between your particular judgment at death and the general judgment at the end of time
Why death is genuinely abhorrent: the violent separation of body and soul, not just leaving earth
Aquinas on why the intellect and will stay fully awake after death even though the senses go dark
St. Gregory versus Aquinas on whether merely seeing hellfire is itself the punishment
Aquinas's actual argument: fire doesn't cook the soul, it binds it, as an instrument of divine justice
Why the fires of hell and purgatory are, per Aquinas, the very same fire
The three conditions required for mortal sin, and why hell is always a freely chosen destination
The limbo of the fathers, the bosom of Abraham, and Christ emptying it at the Harrowing of Hell
The limbo of infants, the 2007 theological commission document, and why it was never defined as dogma
Baptism of desire and the "intent of an intent" question for unbaptized infants
Dave's case for "limburgatory" against Dante's placement of limbo as an annex of hell
Why presuming on God's mercy is itself a sin, and how that shapes the whole limbo debate

REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE
Books & Writings:
Summa Theologiae, Supplement, Questions 69 and 70, by St. Thomas Aquinas (compiled by his students after his death)
The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri (limbo placed as an annex of hell)
Diary: Divine Mercy in My Soul by St. Maria Faustina Kowalska (free on the Amen app)
True Devotion to Mary by St. Louis de Montfort (free on the Amen app)
Catechism of the Catholic Church, paragraph 1261 (hope for children who die without baptism)
The Hope of Salvation for Infants Who Die Without Being Baptized, International Theological Commission, 2007 (approved by Pope Benedict XVI)

Saints & Church Figures:
St. Thomas Aquinas
St. Gregory (the Great)
St. Augustine
St. Francis de Sales
St. Maria Faustina Kowalska
St. Louis de Montfort
Pope Benedict XVI
Dr. Peter Kreeft (referenced via the Matt Fradd interview clip, and the recent death of his wife of 63 years)

People:
Adam Minihan (host; Porter and Prairie Family Farm, Lady Haylee, baby Mary's NICU and eye procedure update, M6 Marketing, The Grounded Builder on Substack)
Dave Niles (host; Fecundity Farm, Niles Ranch, Lady Pamela, the corn harvest, coiner of "limburgatory")
Lady Haylee (Adam's wife)
Lady Pamela (Dave's wife)
Matt Fradd (interviewer in the referenced Peter Kreeft clip)

For the 4th of July, the 250th birthday of America, Adam did the most Okie thing a man can do to celebrate: he took the family to a rodeo. Both boys went mutton busting, Friday and Saturday. Leo, six, drew a slow sheep the second night and rode it a full 17 seconds, hanging on and hollering "keep going, keep going!" into its ear because he knew he needed that sheep to move to score.
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Sponsor: The Amen app (from the Augustine Institute)
The Amen app is the free Catholic prayer app the guys use to prep the family for Sunday, listening to the Sunday Gospel on the way to Holy Mass so the kids are ready to receive it before they walk in. No paywall, no subscription trap, no upfront cost. Download the Amen app right now.
Sponsor: Select International Tours: selectinternationaltours.com
When Adam and Dave decided to lead their first pilgrimage, one name kept coming up: Select International Tours. Having used them, the guys can vouch for it. Wherever in the world you want to go, Select has a tour ready. Whether you want to lead a pilgrimage or attend one, head to selectinternationaltours.com and see everything they offer. You won't regret it.
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He placed top three, took home a little money and a free snow cone, and nobody's sure which one he was prouder of. John, three, puffed his chest out all day, crumbled at the chute, rode two seconds, hit the dirt, cried, and then immediately declared he was doing it again tomorrow. He did. Same result. He was in it for the story.
Then there's Adam and the bull. He's always had the itch to put himself on the line, to go where it takes fortitude and prudence and a whole lot of luck. So he slipped up to the chute with the cowboys, just to feel the atmosphere next to something that powerful. A storm blew in and cut the bull riding short. Adam's calling that one Providence, same as the fight that got cancelled back when COVID shut down the world. Some signs you don't get to ignore.
The pour is Teeling Wonders of Wood Single Pot Still, Virgin Swedish Oak. Ninety three dollars, and worth it. No Jim on hand to work the yummy scale, so the guys guessed it might've metamorphosed into a 7.321. Deep, resonant, dangerously delicious.
The prayer request is Mary. She's a little over four months now, still in the NICU. Adam sent a photo of her smiling right through all the tubing, and it melted everybody. It's been a hard stretch, a step back, but she recovered fast, her breathing's improving, and there's talk of scheduling open heart surgery in the next four to six months. Adam described the NICU "tree," the pole that once held fifteen to twenty bags and lines and now holds four. Look where they were. Look where they are. Thank you for the prayers. They have not been in vain, and Lady Haylee has been heroic through all of it.
Then the topic: what to do when you're struggling. Not just spiritual struggle. Focus, work, sin, the whole weight of it. Most of it isn't laziness. It's disorder, a misalignment between the intellect and the appetites, an internal civil war stoked by stress and exhaustion and distraction. Aquinas names it. Augustine sharpens it: the mind commands the body and it obeys instantly, but the mind commands itself and is resisted. Adam's own admission cut deepest. There is a part of him that does not want to be holy. Naming that was the whole battle. Once he saw the enemy clearly, fasting and prayer stopped feeling like punishment and started feeling like war worth waging. Protect, provide, establish, and fight for your own soul while you're at it. Win the next 15 minutes. Then win the next one. Raise your glass.
TOPICS COVERED
Celebrating the 4th of July, America's 250th, the most Okie way possible: a rodeo
Leo and John mutton busting both nights, and Leo riding a slow sheep 17 seconds while yelling at it to keep going
John, three years old, crumbling at the chute, crying, and immediately signing up to do it again
The bull that jumped the arena into the stands, and Adam's lifelong itch to ride one
Adam sneaking up to the chute and the storm that cut the bull riding short as Providence
Carl's 4th of July party, the Declaration recited by teenagers, the bike parade, and drinking a beer while riding a bike ("bunking")
Bourbon of the week: Teeling Wonders of Wood Single Pot Still, Virgin Swedish Oak, $93
Running the yummy scale without Jim and guessing at a 7.321
Prayer update on baby Mary: four months in the NICU, a smiling photo through the tubing, and open heart surgery on the horizon
The NICU "tree" as a visualization of progress, from twenty lines down to four
Why most struggle is not laziness but disorder and a lack of a clear vision of the end
The human person broken down: intellect, will, and appetites, each with different triggers
St. Thomas Aquinas on the harmony between intellect and appetite, and the civil war when they misalign
St. Augustine on the mind that commands the body instantly but resists commanding itself
The full life of St. John Paul II as a case study in struggle met with faith and joy
Why you should tell your kids and grandkids your real struggle stories, not hide them
Redemptive suffering, and the shortage of real perseverance stories for kids raised on pop culture
Tolkien on dragons: children already know dragons exist; they need to know dragons can be beaten
Curiosity as the quiet vice, and choosing the good over even a lesser good
Why it's about atmosphere and scenarios, not willpower, because willpower gives out fast
Adam's admission that part of him does not want to be holy, and going to war against it
Fortitude as the virtue of winning by not losing, and building a habit of small victories
The Dave Ramsey debt snowball as a picture of stacking wins
Custody of the eyes, stopping the struggle before it starts, and "today, I will be a saint"

REFERENCED IN THIS EPISODE
Books & Writings:
Confessions by St. Augustine (the mind commands itself and is resisted)
Summa Theologiae by St. Thomas Aquinas (harmony and misalignment of intellect and appetite)
The Aeneid by Virgil (Adam reading it aloud with his boys over the summer)
Tolkien's line on dragons in children's stories (misremembered on air as "Jetson")

Saints & Church Figures:
St. John Paul II, Karol Wojtyła (the extended story of his life and suffering)
St. Thomas Aquinas
St. Augustine
The bishop referenced in the "bishop's flattery" aside, may he rest in peace

People:
Adam Minihan (host; the rodeo, the chute, baby Mary, M6 Marketing, The Grounded Builder on Substack)
Dave Niles (host; Lady Pamela and the kids)
Lady Haylee (heroic through Mary's NICU stay)
Leo and John Minihan (the mutton busters)
Karl Graham (friend of the show; the 4th of July party)
Dave Ramsey (the debt snowball and the philosophy of stacking wins)