118. 7 Psychological Reasons We Ignore Red Flags in Relationships
Send us a text Have you ever looked back at a relationship and thought, “Why didn’t I walk away sooner?” You’re not alone — and it’s not about weakness or denial. In this episode, Dr. Gemma Gladstone explores seven powerful psychological reasons we tend to ignore red flags in relationships — especially in the early stages.Drawing on schema therapy, attachment theory, and decades of clinical experience, Gemma breaks down why patterns like schema chemistry, abandonment fears, self-doubt, and people-pleasing keep us stuck in emotionally harmful dynamics — even when we know something feels off.Whether you’re dating, in a relationship, or reflecting on the past, this episode offers deep insight and gentle guidance to help you recognize what’s really going on beneath the surface.You’ll learn:What schema chemistry is — and how it hijacks your attraction radarWhy self-doubt and schemas like defectiveness or dependence make it hard to trust yourselfThe role of the abandonment schema in keeping you hookedHow emotional deprivation creates low expectations in loveWhy people-pleasing, guilt, and over-responsibility make it hard to leaveWhat it means to rewire your “love template”How to start showing up for yourself in new waysMentioned in this episode:Love Wisely Group Coaching — now closed for enrollment. Join the waitlist here for the next round starting September 2025The Red Flag Project Course — our online course to help you break toxic patterns and spot red flags early✨ Reminder: If this episode resonates with you, follow the show and share it with someone who needs to hear it.Let’s break the cycle — together.Support the show🩷Love Wisely - Doors are now closed. Join the WAITLIST to be the first to know when the doors open for the next cohort (Sept, 25). Join My Next Live Workshop Webinar - The Anatomy of a Schema Trigger 🚩The Red Flag Project online course >> Get instant access. 🌻Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!
--------
52:17
--------
52:17
117. How She Stopped Choosing Emotionally Unavailable Men — A Real Case Journey
Send us a textMeet Sophie, a 37-year-old woman who spent years feeling stuck in painful relationship cycles. Like many women I work with, she kept attracting emotionally unavailable or narcissistic men — despite knowing, deep down, that something wasn’t right.In this episode, I’ll walk you through Sophie’s journey: from identifying her relational schemas (like abandonment, emotional deprivation, and subjugation), to understanding how her childhood shaped her “love template,” to the powerful moment she made a clear commitment to change.We’ll explore how she:Finally ended a 7-year relationship that drained her emotionallyIdentified red flags and stopped rationalising harmRebuilt self-trust by healing her inner vulnerable childLet go of the idea that she had a specific “type”Started dating with emotional clarity, rather than fear or old patternsThis transformation is exactly the kind of work we do inside Love Wisely. If you’ve ever asked yourself “Why do I keep ending up in the same kind of relationship?” — this episode is for you.Support the show🩷Love Wisely - Doors are now closed. Join the WAITLIST to be the first to know when the doors open for the next cohort (Sept, 25). Join My Next Live Workshop Webinar - The Anatomy of a Schema Trigger 🚩The Red Flag Project online course >> Get instant access. 🌻Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!
--------
51:00
--------
51:00
116: Why Do We Minimize Harm in Relationships? Understanding the Psychology Behind Tolerating Abuse
Send us a textIn this important solo episode, Gemma reflects on a disturbing real-life conversation overheard between two teenage girls — one of whom casually describes being physically assaulted by her boyfriend. What follows is a powerful deep dive into why girls and women downplay harmful, even abusive, behaviour in relationships.From shame, trauma bonding, and fear of judgement to deeply rooted schemas like abandonment, defectiveness, and subjugation, Gemma explores the internal and social forces that keep so many women stuck — and why prevention, education, and early recognition matter more than ever.What You'll Learn:Why some girls and women minimize abusive behaviour, even when it’s clearly unsafeThe role of schemas (especially abandonment and shame) in tolerating harmHow early emotional wounds shape our dating choices and instinctsWhat trauma bonding is — and how it makes us rationalize abuseKey psychological and cultural reasons why walking away feels so hardWhy we must start taking early signs seriously — for ourselves and the next generationGemma also shares practical reflection prompts, including:What would I tell my younger self?What would I say to a friend in this situation?👉 If this episode resonates with you, or you wish you had trusted yourself sooner in the past — this one’s especially for you.💡 Bonus: If you’re interested in doing the deep work to break free from painful dating patterns and build safer, more secure relationships, sign up for early access to Gemma’s new 12-week group coaching program, Love Wisely — starting Mid June 2025.Support the show🩷Love Wisely - Doors are now closed. Join the WAITLIST to be the first to know when the doors open for the next cohort (Sept, 25). Join My Next Live Workshop Webinar - The Anatomy of a Schema Trigger 🚩The Red Flag Project online course >> Get instant access. 🌻Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!
--------
58:58
--------
58:58
115 – Healing for Love: Why Reparenting Your Abandoned Inner Child is the First Step to Secure Relationships
Send us a textIn this solo episode, Gemma explores one of the most foundational concepts when it comes to healing relationship patterns—the abandonment schema.Whether you're currently dating or in a long-term relationship, understanding your own abandonment schema and how it influences your emotions, choices, and reactions is essential for cultivating emotional safety and secure connection.Gemma explains:What the abandonment schema is and how it developsHow it shows up in dating and relationships (from clingy overcompensation to total avoidance)The 3 common coping styles triggered by this schema—and how they quietly sabotage your love lifeWhy working with your vulnerable child mode is key to healing the abandonment wound3 powerful reparenting practices to begin calming your inner alarm system and making more grounded, self-honoring choices in loveSupport the show🩷Love Wisely - Doors are now closed. Join the WAITLIST to be the first to know when the doors open for the next cohort (Sept, 25). Join My Next Live Workshop Webinar - The Anatomy of a Schema Trigger 🚩The Red Flag Project online course >> Get instant access. 🌻Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!
--------
44:42
--------
44:42
114. Are You Dating As Your True Self — Or a Coping Mode?
Send us a textThe Red Flag Project – Learn how to break free from toxic relationship patterns – theredflagproject.comSchema Coaching & Support – Work with Dr. Gemma GladstoneSupport the show🩷Love Wisely - Doors are now closed. Join the WAITLIST to be the first to know when the doors open for the next cohort (Sept, 25). Join My Next Live Workshop Webinar - The Anatomy of a Schema Trigger 🚩The Red Flag Project online course >> Get instant access. 🌻Help support our continued production. Are you a regular listener who loves our show? Consider supporting us with a contribution each month to help us keep going!
Healing for Love A podcast for anyone who wants to stop shrinking, start healing, and grow into their most grounded, authentic self in love & life. Hosted by Dr Gemma Gladstone — relationship coach, former clinical psychologist (25+ years), and expert in schema healing — this podcast offers thoughtful, insight-rich episodes to help you understand your patterns, heal from past emotional wounds, and gently rewrite your relationship template.If you’ve ever felt stuck in familiar dynamics — seeking approval, fearing abandonment, dating narcissists or losing yourself in relationships — you’re not alone. Healing for Love is a space for self-reflection, emotional insight, and steady encouragement. Here, you’ll learn how to reconnect with your worth, trust your inner voice, and build relationships that support who you truly are.This is for the woman who’s ready to feel more secure, more whole, and more herself — in love and in life.
Ireland