Being Nice Won’t Save You in Difficult Conversations
Being nice won’t save you — especially in conflict. Too often, we think if we’re agreeable enough, people will treat us better or listen more. But that’s not how it works. In this episode, I talk about why “nice” people often get steamrolled in difficult conversations, the difference between being nice and being respectful, and how respectful firmness is actually the real power move.
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21:18
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21:18
STOP Trying to Be Calm. This Is How You Actually Handle Emotional People
Being told to “calm down” never actually makes you calmer. In this episode, I unpack what “calm” really means in conversation—and why it often backfires. Instead of aiming for a blank-slate calm, I’ll show you how to create a grounded connection—a way to stay present, regulate your emotions, and still lean into the conversation with honesty. And stick around until the end, because I’ll give you three powerful comebacks you can use the next time someone tells you to “calm down.”
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Order my new book, The Next Conversation, or listen to the full audiobook today.
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14:50
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14:50
What They Really Mean When They Belittle You
A belittling comment is never about you—it’s about them. In this episode, I break down why people use belittling remarks as a grab for dominance, how to decode the real intent behind their words, and why it’s usually just a projection of their own insecurity. You’ll learn the exact questions to ask that shut down the power play, shift the spotlight back where it belongs, and keep you in control of the conversation.
Thank you to our sponsors:
Cozy Earth. Upgrade Your Every Day. Get 40% off at cozyearth.com/jefferson or use code JEFFERSON at check out.
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BetterHelp. Click https://betterhelp.com/jeffersonfisher for a discount on your first month of therapy.
Order my new book, The Next Conversation, or listen to the full audiobook today.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a 5-star review!
Suggest a topic or ask a question for me to answer on the show!
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15:53
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15:53
Dr. John Delony: Why Your Body Can’t Tell Real Fights From Fake Ones
I flew to Nashville, sat in Dr. John Delony’s studio, and we had the kind of friend-to-friend talk I wish everyone could hear. We got honest about anxiety—how I’ve felt it in my own body—and why our “imaginary fights” leave us overheated before a real conversation even starts. John shared the two moves that changed my playbook: bring calm (it spreads) and tell the truth (facts are kind). We dug into abandonment fears, childhood stuff that sneaks into marriage, and that gut-punch line: “You marry your unfinished business.” If you’ve ever felt anxious mid-conversation, or avoided a hard talk because you were scared of losing someone, this episode gives you practical steps to reset, reconnect, and talk like you actually want to be heard.
Thank you to our sponsors:
Cozy Earth. Upgrade Your Every Day. Get 40% off at cozyearth.com/jefferson or use code JEFFERSON at check out.
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Momentous. Visit https://www.livemomentous.com/ and use code JEFFERSON for 35% off your first order.
BetterHelp. Click https://betterhelp.com/jeffersonfisher for a discount on your first month of therapy.
Order my new book, The Next Conversation, or listen to the full audiobook today.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a 5-star review!
Suggest a topic or ask a question for me to answer on the show!
Want a FREE communication tip each week? Click here to join my newsletter.
Join My School of Communication
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Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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59:46
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59:46
How To Stay In Control! Even When Conversations Turn Emotional
When someone gets emotional in conversation, it can be tough to know how to respond. In this episode, I share how to keep your cool without shutting them down or losing yourself in the moment. You’ll learn how to recognize your own physical reactions, ground yourself with simple reminders, and set healthy boundaries so you can stay steady—even when the other person isn’t.
Thank you to our sponsors:
Cozy Earth. Upgrade Your Every Day. Get 40% off at cozyearth.com/jefferson or use code JEFFERSON at check out.
Monarch Money. 50% off your first year at https://monarchmoney.com/jefferson
BetterHelp. Click https://betterhelp.com/jeffersonfisher for a discount on your first month of therapy.
Order my new book, The Next Conversation, or listen to the full audiobook today.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a 5-star review!
Suggest a topic or ask a question for me to answer on the show!
Want a FREE communication tip each week? Click here to join my newsletter.
Join My School of Communication
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Communicate with confidence so you can argue less and talk more.
Every episode of The Jefferson Fisher Podcast is packed with actionable strategies you can implement today to improve the way you communicate.
Make your next conversation the one that changes everything.
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