The Post-Separation Abuse Podcast

• Navigating communication with your controlling ex: The importance of boundaries for breaking the cycle of abuse

  Ever wondered how to regain control when communicating with a controlling ex-partner? Join me, Australian Separation and Divorce Coach Danielle Black, as we discuss the insidious tactics like DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender) used by these controlling personalities, and learn how their lack of empathy and pathological lying can make them seem more strategic and intelligent than they really are. Protecting your mental and emotional well-being is crucial, especially if you're dealing with PTSD or complex PTSD. We'll dive into the importance of establishing healthy boundaries with your ex-partner to prevent ongoing conflict and potential court complications.  Understand why canned responses might backfire and why seeking professional support can make all the difference in crafting effective communication. My 1:1 coaching clients get access to exclusive resources to help them navigate communication with their former partners with confidence and clarity.  Sound good? Reach out via my website to connect with me today!I'm a specialist Separation, Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach based in Melbourne, Australia.I support women to strategically navigate ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation, and to optimise their outcome for themselves and their children. Part of my specialist coaching includes helping women to optimise their court outcomes, particularly parenting arrangements. If you are navigating the court system with a controlling former partner, or suspect that you might in the future, I can help.To learn more about what I do, and how to work with me, visit: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au For more information about post-separation abuse: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/thank-youFor more information about separation planning (including a checklist):https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/separationplanningFollow me on Instagram: @danielleblackcoachingMORE SUPPORT (within Australia):1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Lifeline: 13 11 14 13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

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• 52. Do you have the right support on your separation journey? How to choose the right coach for you and your situation.

  Join me, Australian coach Danielle Black, as I discuss how my specialised coaching approach prioritises the well-being of both you and your children, equipping you with the tools to set firm boundaries and effectively engage with the legal system after separation.  I delve into the unique benefits of one-on-one coaching, supplemented by the camaraderie of group membership, and discuss how weekly group video calls and an online platform can create essential human connections, providing you with much-needed emotional support in a safe and supportive space. You'll gain a clear understanding of why individualised coaching is indispensable for those navigating complex and legally challenging divorces, ensuring that your unique needs are met with precision and care.I also share with you the ways in which I support clients, including providing strategic guidance to assist in modifying parenting plans without legal repercussions, and preparing clients for interactions with court child experts and family consultants. By focusing on the safety and well-being of your children, my approach can not only save you money overall, but also helps to you maximise the likelihood of a far better outcome. I'm a specialist Separation, Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach based in Melbourne, Australia.I support women to strategically navigate ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation, and to optimise their outcome for themselves and their children. Part of my specialist coaching includes helping women to optimise their court outcomes, particularly parenting arrangements. If you are navigating the court system with a controlling former partner, or suspect that you might in the future, I can help.To learn more about what I do, and how to work with me, visit: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au For more information about post-separation abuse: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/thank-youFor more information about separation planning (including a checklist):https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/separationplanningFollow me on Instagram: @danielleblackcoachingMORE SUPPORT (within Australia):1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Lifeline: 13 11 14 13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

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• 51. Part Two: Do they really have a personality disorder? Differentiating PTSD, male entitlement and personality disorders

  Can you truly distinguish personality disorders from PTSD and CPTSD, or are the lines more blurred than we think? Join me, Danielle Black, as I unravel the complexities of these conditions, shedding light on how traits like mood swings, depression, and emotional dysregulation overlap in CPTSD and BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder). I discuss the critical role of accurate diagnosis and effective therapies, such as EMDR, in helping individuals process trauma and reduce emotional triggers. Mislabeling can lead to harmful consequences, so awareness and understanding are paramount.In the latter part of this episode, I dive into identifying key traits of personality disorders and high conflict personalities, including their impact on relationships and social interactions. I dissect how blaming others, hypersensitivity to criticism, and a lack of self-awareness can make relationships with these individuals particularly challenging. We explore the manipulative behaviours commonly seen in non-disordered abusers and discuss the significant influence of male entitlement and misogyny in abusive dynamics. Lastly, I provide insights into the difficulties of co-parenting and separation from high-conflict, personality disordered individuals, emphasising the importance of personalised strategies over generic 'cookie cutter' solutions.I'm a specialist Separation, Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach based in Melbourne, Australia.I support women to strategically navigate ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation, and to optimise their outcome for themselves and their children. Part of my specialist coaching includes helping women to optimise their court outcomes, particularly parenting arrangements. If you are navigating the court system with a controlling former partner, or suspect that you might in the future, I can help.To learn more about what I do, and how to work with me, visit: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au For more information about post-separation abuse: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/thank-youFor more information about separation planning (including a checklist):https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/separationplanningFollow me on Instagram: @danielleblackcoachingMORE SUPPORT (within Australia):1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Lifeline: 13 11 14 13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

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• 50. Part One: Do they really have a personality disorder? ...Why it's time to stop calling abusers "narcissists"

  What happens when we hastily label our abusive ex-partners as narcissists? Join me, specialist Australian Separation & Divorce Coach Danielle Black, as I explore the critical differences between narcissistic traits and true personality disorders in abusive relationships. We'll uncover the fact that most abusive male behaviours stem from perceived male entitlement  rather than clinical disorders, and how this understanding can change the way you navigate your own experiences. By delving into concepts like male entitlement, and assessing whether problematic or harmful behaviours are consistent across various relationships, you'll gain a clearer perspective on your situation and avoid the pitfalls of mislabeling.Co-parenting with a potentially "narcissistic" ex, especially when trauma is involved, presents a unique set of challenges. In this episode, we'll look at how trauma and PTSD can sometimes mimic narcissistic behaviours and why it's crucial to distinguish between trauma-driven actions and those stemming from male entitlement and/or personality disorders. You'll also learn that generic strategies marketed towards "divorcing a narcissist", like grey rock communication, may not be effective and may even harm your case. We’ll also dissect the long-term patterns associated with personality disorders, helping you recognise key traits and behaviours that differentiate them from non-disordered abusive partners.   I'm a specialist Separation, Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach based in Melbourne, Australia.I support women to strategically navigate ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation, and to optimise their outcome for themselves and their children. Part of my specialist coaching includes helping women to optimise their court outcomes, particularly parenting arrangements. If you are navigating the court system with a controlling former partner, or suspect that you might in the future, I can help.To learn more about what I do, and how to work with me, visit: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au For more information about post-separation abuse: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/thank-youFor more information about separation planning (including a checklist):https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/separationplanningFollow me on Instagram: @danielleblackcoachingMORE SUPPORT (within Australia):1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Lifeline: 13 11 14 13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

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• 49. Part 9 - Post-Separation Abuse Unpacked: Abusive and Neglectful Parenting

  This episode of the Post-Separation Abuse Podcast, hosted by Danielle Black, promises to tackle the disturbing realities of abusive and neglectful parenting. Learn how controlling and abusive parents manipulate their children through tactics like 'infantilisation' and 'parentification'. Discover the emotional toll these harmful behaviours take on the children, making them bear the weight of adult responsibilities and catering to a parent's emotional needs. Uncover the red flags, such as threats of self-harm by the abusive parent, and understand the critical importance of recognising these signs to protect the well-being of children.Specialist coach Danielle Black also shines a spotlight on the behaviours of controlling fathers who use post-separation parenting time as a tool for control rather than connection. These fathers often impose unrealistic expectations, outsource parenting duties, and employ various abusive tactics to maintain dominance. Danielle emphasises the necessity of prioritising the safety and well-being of children over the emotional demands of an abusive ex-partner. As the episode wraps up, find out how to navigate the emotional and logistical hurdles of separation and co-parenting by seeking out supportive resources like 1-800-RESPECT, Danielle’s coaching services, and the Stronger, Braver Together community. Join Danielle to find strength, understanding, strategy and practical advice on this challenging journey.I'm a specialist Separation, Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach based in Melbourne, Australia.I support women to strategically navigate ongoing control and other forms of abuse after separation, and to optimise their outcome for themselves and their children. Part of my specialist coaching includes helping women to optimise their court outcomes, particularly parenting arrangements. If you are navigating the court system with a controlling former partner, or suspect that you might in the future, I can help.To learn more about what I do, and how to work with me, visit: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au For more information about post-separation abuse: https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/thank-youFor more information about separation planning (including a checklist):https://www.danielleblackcoaching.com.au/separationplanningFollow me on Instagram: @danielleblackcoachingMORE SUPPORT (within Australia):1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Lifeline: 13 11 14 13 YARN on 13 92 76 (24/7 crisis support phone line for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples)

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