Psychologists Off the Clock

Don't stress over parenting advice, as much of it is based on clickbait, panic, and outdated science.
In this episode, we hear from science journalists and experts Melinda Wenner Moyer, Tracy Dennis-Tiwary, Jacqueline Nesi in a conversation with Emily on how to spot actual, trustworthy parenting guidance amid all the online noise.
Dismantling the myth of the "one-size-fits-all" approach, they explain why classic research was always meant to be flexible and why anyone claiming there is only one right way is usually just selling something.
You'll also learn about the deep flaws in historical parenting studies and what modern research is getting right, as well as the viral panic surrounding screen time, extreme media narratives, and the real risks AI companions pose to kids' emotional growth.
If you’d appreciate a reassuring, reality-based sanity check on modern parenting so you can tune out the fear and focus on what actually works for your family, tune in for this episode on Parenting Science in the Media.

Listen and Learn:
How parenting advice moved past simple "good vs. bad" rules to look at how things like culture, environment, and everyday context actually shape what works
Calling out rigid parenting advice, spotting the red flags, and breaking down why real child science actually depends on the context
Biases in parenting science and leaning into "goodness of fit" to figure out what actually works for your specific kid
How nuanced, multi-method science often gets distorted by media algorithms and fear-based messaging and how to spot misleading science headlines
How kids are actively using AI, why vulnerable or unfulfilled kids are most at risk of over-dependence, and how parents can guide their children through open communication rather than strict bans
Positive trends in youth resilience and self-control, how modern parenting shifts drive these improvements, and why adults in every generation fall victim to the cognitive bias that "kids these days" are doomed

Resources:
 jacquelinenesi.com
melindawennermoyer.com
https://www.tracydennistiwary.com/
 technosapiens.substack.com
https://tracydennistiwary.substack.com
 melindawmoyer.substack.com.
The Kids Are All Right, Scientific American article by Melinda
Tracy’s Book Review in the New York Times
The Most Elusive Part of Modern Parenting, Emily’s Substack (if you hit a paywall, just email Emily for a free link - emily@emilyedlynnphd.com)

About Melinda Wenner Moyer, Jacqueline Nesi and Tracy Dennis-Tiwary
Melinda Wenner Moyer - Melinda Wenner Moyer is an award-winning science journalist and author. She’s a contributing editor at Scientific American magazine and a regular contributor at The New York Times. She’s the author of How to Raise Kids Who Aren’t Assholes and Hello, Cruel World! She also writes the popular parenting Substack Now What.
Jacqueline Nesi - Jacqueline Nesi, PhD, is a Clinical Psychologist, Associate Professor at Brown University, and author of the popular weekly newsletter Techno Sapiens. Her research focuses on the role of technology in kids’ mental health (especially teens), and on how parents can help. [note that last name is pronounced Nee-See 🙂)
Tracy Dennis-Tiwary, PhD, is a clinical psychologist, professor, researcher, mental health tech entrepreneur, and AI safety advisor. Her research focuses on the intersection between digital technology and mental health. She writes about growing up and growing old in the digital age in news outlets like the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Washington Post, as well as on her Substack The Future of Sanity. She is author of the book Future Tense: Why Anxiety is Good for You (Even Though it Feels Bad).

Related Episodes:
464. Dad Brain with Darby Saxbe
428. How to Fall in Love with Questions with Elizabeth Weingarten
409. Raising Terrific Kids in Terrifying Times with Melinda Wenner Moyer
382. The Anxious Generation? The Conversation We Should Be Having About Kids, Technology, and Mental Health
319. Autonomy-Supportive Parenting with Emily Edlynn
307. Navigating Social Media As a Parent with Cara Goodwin
266. Future Tense with Tracy Dennis-Tiwary
253. Free-Range Kids with Lenore Skenazy
214. How to Raise Kids Who Aren’t Jerks with Melinda Wenner Moyer

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We spend an exhausting amount of energy trying to outrun our own difficult thoughts and feelings.
For this episode, Jill Stoddard brings back ACT therapist, trainer, and author of The Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Skills Workbook, Matt Boone for a refreshingly grounded look at Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. Matt shares how his own path through chronic pain led him to ACT, breaking down why trying to "fix" uncomfortable inner experiences usually backfires.
You'll hear about why we procrastinate, how to unhook from spiral-inducing thoughts, and how to get unstuck when uncertainty feels overwhelming. Plus, Matt shares how ACT helps therapists dodge burnout.
Join us for this practical guide to making peace with the noise in your head so you can finally move toward what actually matters.

Listen to POTC ad-free for just $5 a month by becoming a Mega Supporter on Patreon! Or, support the podcast with a one-time donation at Buy Me A Coffee!

Listen and Learn:
How ACT moves away from trying to "fix" or eliminate difficult emotions, teaching people to live alongside their pain so they can focus energy on what truly matters
Matt’s personal journey from chronic pain patient to ACT therapist, exploring how real-life experiences shaped their approach to therapy and led to designing experiential ACT training courses
How Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) shifts the focus from managing symptom scores to creating meaningful, real-world behavior changes through experiential, values-based action
Why "we hurt where we care," how procrastination and avoidance function to give us short-term relief, and how reconnecting with your deeper "why" can help you step through discomfort toward a full life
How to define values as actionable, ongoing ways of being rather than fixed feelings, and discover practical tools
Aligning small everyday actions with your values to allow you to act with intention, kindness, and self-acceptance, even in hard moments
Major clinical hurdles and creative, practical exercises to act in alignment with your values anyway
How mindfulness allows you to step back and observe unhelpful thoughts without getting tangled up in them or taking them as "capital-T truth
Why arguing with your mind often backfires, how to shift focus from thought content to thought impact, and why taking a "leap of faith" empowers you to take meaningful action aligned with your values

Resources:
The Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Skills Workbook https://www.matthewsboone.com/acceptance-commitment-therapy-skills-workbook
Matt's Website https://www.matthewsboone.com/
Connect with Matt on Social Mediahttps://www.facebook.com/matthew.boone.794/about
https://www.linkedin.com/in/matthewsboone
https://www.praxiscet.com

About Matt Boone:
Matt Boone is a social worker, psychotherapist, and author who specializes in translating mental health concepts for the general public. His books include The Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Skills Workbook, co-authored with Jennifer Gregg, and Stop Avoiding Stuff: 25 Microskills to Face Your Fears and Do It Anyway, co-authored with Jennifer Gregg and Lisa Coyne.

He is the Associate Director at the Student Wellness Program (SWP) of the University of Arkansas for Medical Sciences (UAMS) and Instructor in the Department of Psychiatry. As the Clinical Director of Mental Health Coaching at Lyra Health, he oversaw the clinical development of Lyra’s mental health coaching program and offered workshops and webinars on mental health topics to workers in the tech industry. Lyra partners with eBay, Lyft, Uber, Servicenow and others to provide evidence-based care to their employees.

At Cornell University, he oversaw the development of Let's Talk, an outreach program that has since been replicated at nearly 100 other colleges and universities.

He lives and works in Little Rock, Arkansas with his wife, guitars, and cats, Giorgia (a sassy Tortie) and Finley (a gentle giant orange kitty with a superhuman -- or superkitten-- capacity for empathy).

Related Episodes:
77. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy with Jill Stoddard
106. Therapy from “The Heart of ACT” with Robyn Walser
116. Building a Meaningful, Values-based Life with Jenna LeJeune
121. Be Mighty: An Episode for Stressed Out, Worried Women with Jill Stoddard
128. ACT for Food Restriction and Anorexia with Rhonda Merwin
190. ACT for Suicide Prevention with Sean Barnes
195. ACT Daily with Diana Hill and Debbie Sorensen
226. ACT for Perfectionism with Jennifer Kemp
279. ACT for Healing Black Racial Trauma with Jennifer Shepard Payne
301. Seven Daily ACT Practices for Living Fully with Diana Hill and Debbie Sorensen
313. ACT-Informed Exposure for Anxiety with Brian Pilecki and Brian Thompson
338. ACT for Burnout with Debbie!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Sometimes saving the planet can feel like a massive, exhausting guilt trip.
In this episode, Debbie sits down with University of British Columbia professors Elizabeth Dunn and Jiaying Zhao to talk about their book, Leave the Lights On: How Joyful Decisions Can Save Our Species.
Their main point is about the whole "you must be perfect" climate messaging is totally backfiring, and focusing on joyful, high-impact changes is actually what keeps people motivated. Jiaying breaks down a massive 63-country study showing how scare tactics just make people want to shut down, and the duo debunks some common eco-myths.
It turns out that obsessing over turning off the lights or choosing the perfect reusable bag doesn't move the needle much. Instead, they shout out smarter, high-leverage moves like treating beef and lamb as occasional splurges, eating more plants, and traveling lighter.
They also get into how to influence the people around you by making sustainable choices easy, attractive, and non-political, proving that individual habits and big systemic changes (like voting) both matter.

Listen and Learn:
How "doom and gloom" climate messaging actually backfires by discouraging real-world action
Surprising insights from a massive global study of 60,000 participants across 63 countries
Finding joyful, climate-friendly lifestyle changes to create a positive feedback loop that makes us happier and more motivated to protect the planet
How making practical, high-impact shifts in your daily habits like smarter food choices can create a truly sustainable difference for both you and the planet
Data-backed truth behind common environmental myths and how to easily focus your energy on the daily lifestyle choices that actually make a high-impact difference for the planet
How to significantly lower your carbon footprint without sacrificing the foods you love
Reducing your carbon footprint without giving up the joy of travel by mastering the art of packing light, making smarter flight choices, and embracing the unexpected adventure of staycations
How to inspire positive behavior change in others without lecturing them on climate change
Why individual action and systemic change are not a false dichotomy, but rather a powerful partnership where local community engagement can drive larger policy shifts and boost your personal happiness

Resources:
Leave the Lights On: How Joyful Decisions Can Save Our Species
www.happyclimate.org
Book Debbie mentioned: Soil: The Story of a Black Mother's Garden, by Camille T. Dungy
Debbie’s essay about the drought in Denver, with pictures of her low-water garden: https://drdebbiesorensen.substack.com/p/drought-dispatches-from-denver

About Elizabeth Dunn
Elizabeth Dunn is Professor of Psychology at the University of British Columbia and coauthor of Happy Money. She directs UBC’s Happy Lab, which focuses on how to optimize valuable resources including time, money, and carbon to maximize human well-being. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The Washington Post, Los Angeles Times, The Atlantic, TIME, Rolling Stone, and Harvard Business Review; and on numerous podcasts and television shows, including Hidden Brain, NPR’s Short Wave, The Happiness Lab, Ten Percent Happier with Dan Harris, Morning Joe, and CBS Mornings. Dunn spoke on the TED mainstage in 2019, and her talk was selected as one of the top ten TED talks of the year.

About Jiaying Zhao
Jiaying Zhao (JZ) is Professor of Psychology and Sustainability and founded the Behavioral Sustainability Lab at the University of British Columbia, which designs and tests behavioral solutions that encourage climate action. She has worked with NASA, NOAA, and the US and Canadian Forest Service to develop pathways to net zero. Zhao has appeared on numerous podcasts and in documentary films, including Why Is This Happening? With Chris Hayes and Close the Divide. Her research has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, TIME, The Economist, Scientific American, CNN, and NBC. In 2023, Zhao gave a TED talk on climate strategies rooted in happiness, which was selected as one of the top TED Talks to be a better you in 2024.

Related Episodes:
262. Hope and Values in Dark Times with Us
255. Influence is Your Superpower with Zoe Chance
215. How to Change with Katy Milkman
371. Uniting Toward a Better Future with Diana McLain Smith
431. Ordinary Magic: Social Psychology for Big Change with Gregory Walton

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Are we being lied to about the science of attraction?
In this episode, UC Davis relationship scientist and author of Bonded by Love: The New Science of Human Attachment, Paul Eastwick, challenges the massive online narratives around "mate value," hardwired gender differences, and dating strategies. It turns out a lot of the viral relationship theories we see online are built on shaky evidence, relying on photos and surveys rather than real, live human interaction.
Paul explains why what we say we want on paper almost never predicts who we actually fall for in person. He redefines compatibility not as a rigid trait-matching algorithm, but as something unique that two people construct together over time.
If you're ready to look past the internet's rigid dating rules and see how attraction actually works in the wild, tune in.
[And if you are interested in pre-ordering Yael’s book, Why Don’t You Understand Me?, this link will take you to the larger booksellers, while THIS link will take you to her pre-order bonus form. Thank you for supporting Yael’s book launch! https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeq8tfQnl1o5GvfxrIrDzeOFtIvB8E16czMKajY3B8IDy1oww/viewform]

Listen and Learn:
The "Evo script" and the popular, outdated evolutionary psychology myths that dominate modern dating advice and why the latest science challenges its assumptions about mate value, gender differences, and relationship strategies
Why popular evolutionary psychology models fail to predict real-world relationship success, and learn how relationship science reveals a far less competitive and much more hopeful reality of how we actually choose and stay with our partners
Why the way we evaluate romantic partners on paper or dating apps is completely different from how we judge them in person
The surprising scientific truth that our abstract checklists for a romantic partner rarely predict real compatibility, discovering instead how long-term satisfaction is built through shared experiences rather than finding someone who matches a mental template
How actual data debunks extreme evolutionary psychology scripts about gender differences, revealing that men and women are much more aligned in their romantic and sexual desires than popular media and online advice suggest
Why the concept of "mate value" and physical attractiveness only matter for short-term dating and initial impressions, while true long-term relationship success depends on compatibility that partners uniquely construct together rather than a predictable algorithm
How relationship satisfaction and compatibility are not predetermined by matching personality traits, but are instead actively constructed through vulnerability, open-minded interactions, and the unpredictable connections built within real-world social networks
Why platonic friendships between heterosexual men and women are not only entirely possible but also deeply enriching, mind-expanding, and a proven positive predictor for finding a romantic partner in the long run
The major drawbacks of online dating, learn why you should wait until the third date before making a decision, and find out how a "failed" date can actually help you find your next match

Resources:
Bonded by Love: The New Science of Human Attachment https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9780593593981
https://www.lovefactuallypod.com/
http://pauleastwick.com/pauleastwick
https://linktr.ee/pauleastwick

About Paul Eastwick
Paul Eastwick is a professor of psychology at UC Davis, where he runs the Attraction and Relationships Research Laboratory. His work sits at the intersection of evolutionary psychology, social psychology, and close relationships research, meaning he has spent his career asking why people fall for who they fall for, and whether the stories we tell ourselves about that process hold up to scientific scrutiny.
His new book, Bonded by Love: The New Science of Human Attachment, makes a sweeping argument: the dominant narrative about human mating — attraction as hierarchy, competition, genetic optimization — isn't just incomplete. It's wrong in ways that matter. The real science of how humans form lasting bonds is, if anything, more interesting and more hopeful than what we've been sold.
His research has been funded by the National Science Foundation, he sits on the editorial boards of several major psychology journals, and he has the rare combination of scientific rigor and personal candor. Paul is also the co-host of Love Factually, a podcast he runs with Northwestern relationship researcher Eli Finkel, which fact-checks Hollywood rom-coms one movie at a time (and which happens to be one of Yael’s favorite binge-listens).

Related Episodes:
63. The Ape That Understood the Universe with Steve Stewart-Williams
92. Marriage in Midlife with Daphne de Marneffe
179. How to Be an Adult in Relationships with Dave Richo
248. Let’s Talk about Sex & Intimacy with Zoë Kors
397. The Mindful Path to Intimacy with James Cordova

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

For some people, stories are entertainment; for others, they can be a lifeline.
Janina Scarlet, licensed clinical psychologist, author, and founder of Divine Feminine Publishing, returns to discuss her work promoting books with strong female and gender-diverse representation. She shares how surviving illness after Chernobyl, along with physical and sexual abuse, led her to find comfort in stories and eventually become a writer.
The conversation covers the challenges of writing about personal experiences, the importance of reading widely, separating drafting from editing, and protecting creativity. Janine also talks about researching and writing her Holocaust novel, Through Bullets and Thunderstorms, based on her grandmother’s survival in Ukraine.

Listen and Learn:
How surviving childhood trauma, abuse, and the aftermath of Chernobyl shaped Janina’s drive to write, revealing how fictional characters can serve as vital support systems and how shared vulnerability allows us to step into each other's worlds to find hope and healing
How sharing our deepest, most vulnerable personal stories is an act of courage that fosters post-traumatic growth and acts as a powerful reminder to others that they are not alone
Kickstarting your writing journey by reading your target market and separating the creative writing process from the analytical editing phase
Why giving up prematurely is a beginner's biggest mistake and how learning to "embrace the mess" of an imperfect first draft is the true secret to finishing your book
How to break out of the research "bottomless pit" when writing about unfamiliar topics by leveraging interviews with experts and people with lived experience to craft authentic, deeply nuanced fiction
The raw and deeply personal story behind Janina’s book, Through Bullets and Thunderstorms: Our Holocaust Survival Pact

Resources:
Through Bullets and Thunderstorms: A Holocaust Survival Pact https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9798992940404
https://www.superhero-therapy.com/
https://divinefeminine-publishing.com/
https://writingtheother.com/
Michael’s Confidence Course https://herold.coach/course
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9780808510574
The Artist's Way https://bookshop.org/a/30734/9780143129257

About Dr. Janina Scarlet
Dr. Janina Scarlet (she/her) is a licensed clinical psychologist, author, a neurodivergent, queer person with a disability, and founder of the Divine Feminine indie book publishing company. She has authored eighteen books and written chapters for twenty others.
Dr. Scarlet is the recipient of the Eleanor Roosevelt Human Rights Award from the United Nations Association. She regularly consults on books and television shows, including HBO’s Young Justice. She was also interviewed for Marvel’s MPower series and was portrayed as a comic book character in Gail Simone’s Seven Days graphic novel.
Dr. Scarlet’s goal is to promote books featuring at least 50% female and/or gender-diverse characters because when women and gender-diverse people have greater representation in fiction, it empowers them to have a stronger voice in real life.

Related Episodes
325. Unseen, Unheard, Undervalued with Janina Scarlet
275. Work parent thrive with Yael
345. Writing for Personal Growth with Maureen Murdock

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.