The Divorce Course Podcast

🎧 Listen to this episode if:
You're arguing over furniture or household items in divorce

Your ex has taken everything or won't give anything back

You've been told "you can't take anything if you leave"

You want to avoid wasting money on legal fees over small items

You're trying to work out what's actually fair vs worth fighting for

Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Trigger Warning
This episode contains discussion of family violence, coercive control, and separation dynamics, which may be distressing for some listeners.
If you are unsafe, do not attempt to retrieve belongings alone.
This podcast provides general educational information only and is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance tailored to your circumstances.
What happens to all the "stuff" when you separate?
Everyone talks about the house, the bank accounts, and the kids… but no one really talks about the furniture, the appliances, the artwork  and yes, even the toilet brush.
In this episode, Mum and I unpack what actually happens to household contents in a property settlement, and why these seemingly small things can end up causing some of the biggest fights.
We break down what the law really says (and what it doesn't say), whether it matters who paid for something, and why arguing over furniture can end up costing you far more in legal fees than the item is even worth.
We also walk through four practical ways to divide furniture based on your ex's personality type whether they're amicable, avoidant, high conflict, or controlling so you can sort it out without derailing your entire settlement.
⏱️ Episode Timeline
00:00 – Furniture in Divorce: Common Myths You Need to Know
01:40 – Safety, Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Warning
02:36 – What the Law Says About Furniture in Divorce
03:03 – Who Owns Furniture After Separation?
07:02 – Divorce and Possession: Who Keeps What?
07:41 – Myth: Do You Lose Furniture If You Leave the House?
09:45 – Cost vs Value: Is Furniture Worth Fighting Over?
11:32 – Emotional Furniture Fights in Divorce Explained
13:58 – Amicable Divorce: The Two List Method (Simple Solution)
16:24 – Avoidant Ex: How to Pack, Send & Move Their Stuff
18:54 – Shed Disputes & When to Get Legal Advice
20:54 – Free Divorce Resources You Can Use
21:43 – When to Move Out During Divorce (Timing Matters)
22:41 – High Conflict Divorce: Should You Sell Everything?
24:50 – Valuing Furniture in Divorce Negotiations
27:55 – Biggest Mistakes People Make With Furniture
31:11 – Don't Let Furniture Ruin Your Property Settlement
34:03 – Mindset Shift: It's Not About the Stuff
35:30 – Fresh Start After Divorce: Letting Go
39:47 – Final Takeaways: Fairness & Moving Forward
🎧 Additional Episodes Mentioned
What About Their Stuff and Belongings?
(Referenced when discussing how to handle an ex leaving items behind or refusing to collect them) https://youtu.be/T_tQUbhBxbQ?si=kt1ChMF08dquxgkr

 
 Links & Resources
1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732

Lifeline – 13 11 14

 
If this episode helped you rethink how to approach the "stuff" in your separation, make sure you follow, rate, review, and share the podcast so others can avoid getting stuck in the same fights.

🎧 Listen to this episode if:
You or your ex has a serious illness or disability

You've been a carer during the relationship

You have ongoing medical expenses

You're worried about future financial support after separation

You want to understand how courts assess health in property settlement

⚖️ Legal Disclaimer
This podcast is for educational purposes only and provides general information about Australian family law. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.
 
 
What happens in a property settlement when serious illness is part of the story?
In this episode, Mum (a family law specialist and family lawyer) and I unpack one of the most emotional and often misunderstood areas of family law: how health issues, illness, and medical needs may impact your property settlement percentage.
Because when you're going through separation, you're not just dividing assets…
You're also dealing with uncertainty, fear, ongoing treatment, and the reality of what life will look like moving forward.
We talk about what happens if:
you cared for a sick partner for years

you are the one who is unwell

there are ongoing medical expenses

or even if someone has a life-limiting illness

We break down how the court looks at contributions vs future needs, why simply saying "I'm unwell" isn't enough, and how these factors can actually shift the percentages in your property settlement.
If illness has played a role in your relationship on either side this episode will help you understand how the law approaches it, and what it might mean for you.
⏱️ Episode Timeline - Health and Divorce: How Illness May Affect Property Settlement Percentage
00:00 – Illness and Divorce: How Health Impacts Property Settlement
00:22 – Why Health Changes Everything in Divorce Outcomes
01:32 – Meet the Hosts & Divorce Episode Overview
01:57 – Real Story: Endometriosis and Divorce Costs
03:07 – Divorce Property Settlement Explained (Step-by-Step)
04:38 – Caring for a Sick Partner in Divorce: Does It Count?
07:43 – What If You're the Sick Partner in Divorce?
09:46 – Divorce and Spousal Maintenance: Your Options
11:37 – Life Expectancy & Divorce Future Needs Explained
15:47 – Medical Expenses, Kids & Divorce (NDIS Explained)
19:12 – Proving Medical Needs in Divorce Settlements
21:00 – Short-Term vs Long-Term Illness in Divorce
21:41 – Temporary vs Chronic Illness in Divorce Cases
23:34 – Open-Ended Spousal Maintenance in Divorce
24:46 – Remission, Recovery & Divorce Medical Evidence
27:43 – How to Prove Illness in Divorce Court
30:18 – Divorce Surveillance, Fraud Claims & Mental Health
32:48 – When Both Parties Are Sick in Divorce
33:34 – Financial Obligations After Divorce Separation
35:19 – Divorce Agreements: Risks You Need to Know
37:20 – Rapid Fire Divorce Questions About Illness
39:07 – Divorce Mediation Tips When Illness Is Involved
40:46 – The Emotional Reality of Illness in Divorce
42:15 – Final Thoughts: Advocating for Yourself in Divorce
 
🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode
1️⃣ Consent Orders vs Binding Financial Agreements - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5qgGhdAl5UaOo7LHb2Yf5Y?si=OFf8umvVQ7KAbzntw6AnVg
2️⃣ The Divorce Course (Program / Course Reference) www.thedivorcecourse.com.au
 
 
⚠️ Family Violence & Sensitive Content
This episode discusses illness, vulnerability, and complex family dynamics, which may be distressing for some listeners.
If you need support in Australia:
📞 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732
📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14
🚨 In an emergency, call 000
 
 
⚖️ Legal Disclaimer
This podcast is for educational purposes only and provides general information about Australian family law. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.
 
 
If this episode helped you better understand how health can impact your divorce, please make sure to follow, rate, review, and share the podcast it helps others going through the same thing find this information too.

🎧 Listen to this episode if:
You feel like your ex knows things they shouldn't

You suspect you're being tracked, monitored, or watched

You're going through separation and worried about digital safety

Your ex had access to your devices, passwords, or accounts

You want to protect yourself and your children from tech-based abuse

What if your ex knew where you were… who you were talking to… and what you were saying — without you ever telling them?
In this episode, we're joined by Catherine Plunkett, Director of Safety Net Australia at WESNET, to unpack the growing reality of technology-facilitated abuse in relationships and after separation.
Because abuse doesn't always leave bruises.
Sometimes it looks like:
your ex showing up where you are unexpectedly

knowing things you never told them

accessing your messages, accounts, or location

And increasingly, this is becoming one of the most common forms of domestic and family violence.
We break down what tech abuse actually is, how it happens, the warning signs to look for, and most importantly what you can do to protect yourself and your children.
If something doesn't feel right, this episode will help you understand what might be happening and what steps you can take next.
⏱️ Episode Timeline - Is Your Ex Watching You? Tech Abuse in Divorce Explained
00:00 – Is Your Ex Spying on You? Hidden Tech Abuse Signs
01:35 – What Is Tech Abuse? How It Works in Relationships
05:10 – How Common Is Digital Abuse After Separation?
06:52 – Tracking Apps, Spyware & How People Monitor You
12:06 – Warning Signs Your Phone or Accounts Are Compromised
16:20 – What NOT to Do If You Suspect You're Being Watched
18:00 – Digital Safety Checks & Getting the Right Support
20:33 – Safe Phones, New Devices & Protecting Your Accounts
23:12 – That "Alarm Feeling": Trusting Your Instincts
24:11 – Smart Homes & Hidden Tracking Risks You Didn't Expect
26:31 – Cars, GPS & How Vehicles Can Track You
27:45 – Digital Safety Checklist: Steps You Can Take Today
30:47 – How Kids Can Be Used in Tech Monitoring
35:20 – AI, Deepfakes & The Future of Digital Abuse
38:39 – Where to Get Help for Tech Abuse
41:17 – Your Right to Privacy and Safe Communication
42:27 – What Safety Net Australia Does for Victims
44:19 – Final Thoughts, Support & Next Steps
🔗 Links & Resources
Safety Net Australia – https://techsafety.org.au

eSafety Commissioner – https://www.esafety.gov.au

1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732

Lifeline Australia – 13 11 14

⚠️ Family Violence Disclaimer
This episode contains discussion of family violence and may be distressing for some listeners.
If you are experiencing domestic or family violence, support is available:
📞 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732
📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14
🚨 In an emergency, call 000
⚖️ Legal Disclaimer
This podcast is for educational purposes only and discusses general concepts. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.

🎧 Listen to this episode if:
You've been told to attend mediation but feel unsafe agreeing to child care arrangements

Your ex is pushing for 50/50 care and you don't believe it's appropriate for the kids

You're dealing with substance abuse, family violence, or safety concerns and your child's safety

You feel pressured to compromise at mediation when you don't want to

You want to understand your options without giving in on safety

Have you been told you need to go to mediation, but you're worried about the outcome because you simply cannot budge when it comes to your child's safety?
Has your ex demanded 50/50 care, but deep down you know that arrangement isn't in your child's best interests right now?
We talk about how to approach mediation when you feel stuck, how to clearly communicate your concerns, and the practical options that may be discussed  including supervised time, stepped arrangements, and drug and alcohol testing.
If you're feeling pressured, overwhelmed, or unsure how to stand your ground, this episode will help you navigate mediation with clarity and confidence.
⏱️ Episode Timeline -Refusing 50/50 Care? What to Do in Mediation When Your Child's Safety Comes First
[00:00] – Mediation With Safety Fears
[02:33] – What Mediation Really Is
[05:40] – Holding The Safety Line
Why you don't have to agree to unsafe arrangements just to reach an outcome.
[06:37] – Define The Real Risks
How to clearly identify and communicate your specific safety concerns.
[09:27] – What Courts Call Unsafe
Understanding how the court views risk and safety in parenting matters.
[10:33] – Supervised Time Options
Exploring supervised contact as a way to maintain relationships safely.
[12:56] – Choosing Contact Centres
How supervised contact works and what to consider when selecting a centre.
[16:34] – Cutting Contact And Court Optics
What happens if time is stopped altogether and how it may be viewed legally.
[18:43] – Stepped Parenting Orders
Using gradual increases in time to build safety and trust over time.
[21:26] – Therapy Conditions And Pitfalls
When therapy is suggested, what to watch out for and potential risks.
[23:06] – Drug And Alcohol Testing
How testing can be used to address concerns and create accountability.
[26:25] – Costs And Waitlists
The practical realities of supervision services and delays.
[26:45] – Paying For Supervision
Who pays for supervised time and how this is handled.
[27:28] – Preparing For Mediation
How to go into mediation feeling clear, confident, and prepared.
[28:13] – When They Refuse Supervision
What to do if the other parent won't agree to safe options.
[28:48] – Best Interests Not 50/50
Why equal time is not automatic and must reflect the child's needs.
[30:40] – Court View On Refusal
How the court may interpret refusal to compromise or engage.
[33:27] – Holding Your Safety Line
Practical ways to stay firm without escalating conflict.
[35:17] – If Mediation Hits Impasse
What happens when no agreement is reached and what comes next.
[38:17] – Costs Threats Reality Check
Addressing fear around legal costs and pressure tactics.
[39:07] – Using Mediation For Property
How mediation can still be useful even if parenting isn't resolved.
[43:16] – Authenticity And Support
Staying grounded, supported, and focused during a difficult process.
⚖️ Family Violence & Legal Disclaimer
This episode contains discussion of family violence and may be distressing for some listeners.
If you are affected, please consider listening with support or contact:
Lifeline (Australia): 13 11 14
1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732
This podcast is for educational purposes only and discusses general concepts in Australian family law. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your specific circumstances.
🔗 Helpful Resources
1800 RESPECT – National Domestic Violence Support

Lifeline Australia – 13 11 14

Relationships Australia (Supervised Contact Services)

Parenting communication apps: OurFamilyWizard, AppClose

🎧 Recommended Episodes
Mediation: What It Is (and What It Isn't)  https://youtu.be/YvcWAYuG4QA?si=hSiXFvVDaFDV4J6v

Understanding the Best Interests of the Child (Section 60CC) https://youtu.be/k4-QTbfW8XM?si=SDzN2cIzO4FtlMQu

Mediation Series: How to Prepare and What to Expect https://youtu.be/cmcFWXD2EBs?si=TqUcJvQzmd2MMNJc

🎧 Listen to this episode if:
You are about to negotiate parenting orders or a parenting plan



Your coparent is high conflict, manipulative or controlling



You're worried they will twist agreements or exploit loopholes



You're preparing for mediation or family court for parenting orders



You want parenting orders that actually reduce future arguments

Family Violence & Legal Disclaimer
This episode contains discussion of family conflict and family violence which may be distressing for some listeners.If you are experiencing family violence or feel unsafe, please contact 1800 RESPECT (Australia) or your local domestic violence support service.
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. Laura and Lynette are discussing general concepts in Australian family law. Every situation is different, and listeners should obtain independent professional guidance about their specific circumstances.
Episode Time Stamps: The Parenting Order Loopholes Your Ex Will Exploit (And How to Close Them)
00:00 High Conflict Co Parenting
01:59 Why Orders Need Clarity
05:10 Changing Orders Is Hard
07:03 Loophole 1 Communication Rules
11:53 Loophole 2 Last Minute Changes
14:12 Loophole 3 Handover Boundaries
20:14 Loophole 4 Extracurricular Conflicts
26:30 Loophole 5 Stop Trash Talking
28:04 High School Choice Traps
29:39 Private School Fee Fights
31:14 School Updates and Access
32:07 Kids Phones and Screen Rules
35:50 Passports and Travel Clauses
40:06 Medical Decisions and Info
44:34 Emergency Contact Requirements
46:27 Rosters Holidays and Ambiguity
50:07 Think About What Ifs
51:12 Wrap Up and Disclaimers
 
 
Helpful Resources
Lifeline (Australia): 13 11 14



1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732



Family Court of Australia resources on parenting arrangements



Parenting communication apps: OurFamilyWizard, AppClose, Talking Parents

Episodes Mentioned in This Episode
1. 12 Agreements to Include in Parenting Plans
Referenced when discussing the main structure of parenting agreements before talking about loopholes. https://open.spotify.com/episode/6j325rOj96QvV8spPnYsX5?si=td4XlKQZSr6CXfCSm9H_bA
2. Handover Hell
Mentioned during the discussion about pick-up and drop-off conflicts and handover disputes. https://open.spotify.com/episode/6Pskjns3vZkLyv9FCefvxm?si=guIkwi1ITJuTOnshvpP9VA
3. Trash Talking
Referenced when discussing parents speaking negatively about the other parent around the children.https://open.spotify.com/episode/7bxqn5I6B1HCzO9r0zKnxY?si=nEH3splzQxSTBOUikJJHhA
4. Interstate Travel With Children After Separation
Mentioned during the travel and passport boundary discussion. https://open.spotify.com/episode/0auxUUS6QSh0ILcGHXbQgk?si=CmhYz74pSquyhTI2dgRMbQ
5. Tech Facilitated Abuse
Referenced during the children's phones, devices and monitoring discussion. COMING SOON
6. Sole Parental Responsibility
Suggested for listeners who want to understand decision-making authority around medical or school issues. https://open.spotify.com/episode/2O0VczmgtAPUrvcgJiF8HP?si=BM0nanlwTP6k67SMF8yg4g
Summary
Many parents believe that once parenting orders are made, the conflict will finally stop.
But the reality is court orders don't magically change behaviour.
If you are dealing with a high-conflict, manipulative, controlling or avoidant ex, poorly written parenting orders can become a playground for loopholes, misunderstandings and ongoing arguments.
In this episode of the Divorce Course Podcast, Laura and Lynette break down the most common loopholes people exploit in parenting orders and the practical boundaries you may want to think about before signing anything.
Because while parenting orders can't eliminate conflict entirely, clear boundaries can prevent many of the arguments before they even start.
You'll learn how to think about communication, handovers, school decisions, travel rules, technology, medical issues and more all through the lens of preventing future conflict.