The One Day At A Time Recovery Podcast

My name is Arlina, I'm a best-selling author of the 12 step guide for skeptics, I've been sober for 32 years myself, and I'll be your host.
Before we jump in, I just want to share that I have a few coaching spots opening up. There seems to be a lot of people who are sober and building businesses, which in this economy, is really smart! The biggest challenge I see is people who are under earning Due to subconscious fears. I use hypnosis and internal family systems as part of the process of eliminating limiting beliefs and creating a new identity that supports your goals. So if you're sober and you're building a business, but you keep self-sabotaging or staying stuck, I work with people exactly like you. Book a free discovery call at soberlifeschool.com.
Today I sit down with Sonia Kahlon, co-founder of Sisters in Sobriety to tackle Step 5. Sonia has been moving through the steps with remarkable consistency, and this conversation gets real about resentments, boundaries, fear of asking for what we need, and the surprising ways sobriety makes us more sensitive, not less.
This episode is packed with practical wisdom, including:
• Why resentment is called the #1 cause of relapse - and what to do about it
• How to set a boundary without going from doormat to dictator
• The difference between your thoughts and your actions (and why it matters for Step 6)
• How sobriety can actually make you slower to react - and why that's okay
• What the Karpman Drama Triangle is and how it shows up in your relationships
• Why if you spot it you got it is a tool for compassion, not self-punishment
• How to use canned responses to navigate emotionally charged conversations
So without further delay, please enjoy this episode with Sonia!
 
SHOW NOTES:
 
Guest Website: https://sistersinsobriety.substack.com/
👊🏼Need help applying this information to your own life?
Here are 3 ways to get started:
🎁Free Guide: 30 Tips for Your First 30 Days - With a printable PDF checklist
Grab your copy here: https://www.soberlifeschool.com
☎️Private Coaching: Make Sobriety Stick
https://www.makesobrietystick.com
Subscribe So You Don't Miss New Episodes!
 
Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Amazon Music, or you can stream it from my website HERE. 
You can also watch the interview on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@theonedayatatimepodcast?sub_confirmation=1

 

 
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast/id1212504521
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4I23r7DBTpT8XwUUwHRNpB
Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/a8eb438c-5af1-493b-99c1-f218e5553aff/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast

Relapsing is such a common experience for people early in recovery. This episode is going to be really important for those who are exploring all the nuances of how people find recovery and the predictors of long-term recovery. 
Before we jump in, if you haven't yet, please consider supporting the podcast by joining the YouTube members only content for just $1.99 per month. It's ad free content and by showing your support, I can keep creating free content for you. The podcast costs about $500 per month so every little bit helps. Thank you so much!
Today I sit down with Dr. Ross Ellenhorn, a sociologist and founder of Ellenhorn, one of the most robust community integration programs in the United States. For over 20 years, Dr. Ellenhorn has been running what he calls a "hospital without walls" - a program that meets people where they are, literally going to school with clients, accompanying them to jobs, and helping them rebuild their lives inside their communities rather than removing them from those communities to treat them. 
In this episode, you'll learn:
• What "fear of hope" is and how it quietly blocks people from moving forward
• Why denial and resistance are more about your environment than your psychology
• How self-efficacy and pride are the real building blocks of lasting recovery
and
• The difference between hope and faith - and why both matter for recovery
So without further delay, please enjoy this episode with Dr Ellenhorn.
 
Guest Website: https://ellenhorn.com 
👊🏼Need help applying this information to your own life?
Here are 3 ways to get started:
🎁Free Guide: 30 Tips for Your First 30 Days - With a printable PDF checklist
Grab your copy here: https://www.soberlifeschool.com
☎️Private Coaching: Make Sobriety Stick
https://www.makesobrietystick.com
Subscribe So You Don't Miss New Episodes!
Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Amazon Music, or you can stream it from my website HERE. 
You can also watch the interview on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@theonedayatatimepodcast?sub_confirmation=1
 
 
 

 

 
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast/id1212504521
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4I23r7DBTpT8XwUUwHRNpB
Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/a8eb438c-5af1-493b-99c1-f218e5553aff/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast

Before we jump in, I have a couple of programming notes for you. The first is that since this month is the 10th anniversary of the show, I'll be publishing a back to basics series for those who are either allergic to the 12 steps, who are sober curious or otherwise needing support for early recovery.
The second is to let you know that there are lots of free resources on the podcast website at odaatchat.com. There's a guide called 30 tips for your first 30 days, how to have sober fun, and how to make sobriety stick. These are all free and available for instant download.
 
Okay friend, if you are skeptical of the steps, I actually wrote a whole book about "The 12 Step Guide for Skeptics" available on Amazon, but if you find yourself curious about the program, we are getting into the nitty gritty work of the 12 steps today! This is another installment of the stepwork series that I have been doing with Sonia Kahlon, co-founder of Sisters in Sobriety.
 
I just love Sonia. She's so courageous in her willingness to work the program in semi public. We will be doing some of this work in private because I want her to feel safe in doing the work, but you'll get a peek into the process so you can make an informed decision to try the steps or not.
 
In this episode, we walk through Sonia's actual Step 4 inventory together - her resentments toward her parents, her brother, and her ex-husband - and dig into what finding your part really means when you weren't the one who caused the damage.
 
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why Step 4 is not about taking blame - it's about finding your power

- How unresolved resentments show up as triggers, even years later

- The difference between self-pity and an appropriate emotional response to pain

- How the people we're most resentful toward reveal our deepest limiting beliefs

- Why self-abandonment is often the real pattern hiding underneath our biggest resentments

and

- How to find the gifts that grew out of your most painful experiences

So without further delay, please enjoy this episode, and let me know what you think!
 
SHOW NOTES:
 
Guest Website: https://sistersinsobriety.substack.com/
👊🏼Need help applying this information to your own life?
Here are 3 ways to get started:
🎁Free Guide: 30 Tips for Your First 30 Days - With a printable PDF checklist
Grab your copy here: https://www.soberlifeschool.com
☎️Private Coaching: Make Sobriety Stick
https://www.makesobrietystick.com
Subscribe So You Don't Miss New Episodes!
 
Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Amazon Music, or you can stream it from my website HERE. 
You can also watch the interview on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/@theonedayatatimepodcast?sub_confirmation=1
 
 
 

 

 
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast/id1212504521
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4I23r7DBTpT8XwUUwHRNpB
Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/a8eb438c-5af1-493b-99c1-f218e5553aff/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast

Today I sit down with Adam Vibe Gunton - bestselling author, founder of the nonprofit Recovered on Purpose, and owner of a 68-bed treatment center in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. Adam went from being given cocaine at age 12 and starring as the defensive captain of Columbine High School's state championship football team, to a homeless heroin addict who overdosed in 2015 - and has the police body cam footage to prove it. He's the only person I know of who showed their own dead body during a TED Talk.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why a decade of 12-step meetings still left Adam unable to stay sober, and what the critical missing piece was
The "wrong" sponsor who turned out to be exactly right - and why everything you've been told about finding a sponsor might be backwards
The spiritual experience at an IHOP that marked the last day Adam ever used
Why people like Adam literally die without the 12 steps being done quickly and rigorously
How November 6th keeps showing up as the most important date of his life
How his nonprofit is making sure nobody has to spend Christmas on a trap house floor calling treatment centers who won't pick up

Hi friend, welcome to the podcast, my name is Arlina, I've been sober for 32 years, and it's my life's mission to carry a message of hope for recovery.
Here's a question we all need to consider, No matter where you are in your recovery journey: What if the survival skills that you develop in childhood - the performing, the achieving, and the self-abandonment for the sake of appeasing others- are the exact habits quietly keeping you feeling stuck in adulthood? This actually happens to everybody in one form or another, and we're going to talk about how to break some of those patterns.
Today I sit down with Katie Hingle, founder and CEO of Lavish, and a woman in long term recovery to talk about how she is working through her own survival patterns. 
I've known Katie for decades, and always admired her, not just because she's so accomplished as an executive at Adobe, and now the CEO at her own company, but because she is a woman of faith, service and integrity. Katie is one of those shining examples of someone who has done real work - not just recovery from alcohol, but the untreated perfectionism, people-pleasing, and codependence underneath it.
But before we jump in, I just want to share with you that because June marks 10 years of the One Day at a Time podcast, I am going to be doing something a little different In the upcoming weeks. I am going to do a series of episodes focused on early recovery. This will be for those who are simply wanting to take a break from alcohol, those who are sober curious and don't want to go to AA, or those coming back after a period of drinking. I want you to know that no matter where you are in your journey, I am here to support you with a safe space for coming to your own conclusions.
In today's episode, you'll learn:
• How to recognize when your survival mechanisms have become your biggest liability
• Why resentment is the root of the devolving process in recovery and relationships
• The concept of collateral growth - and why doing your own work changes everyone around you
And 
• How recovery principles translate directly into building a business and showing up in relationships
 
So without further delay, please enjoy this episode with Katie.
 
Guest Website: lavishexperienceco.com
👊🏼Need help applying this information to your own life?
Here are 3 ways to get started:
🎁Free Guide: 30 Tips for Your First 30 Days - With a printable PDF checklist
Grab your copy here: https://www.soberlifeschool.com
☎️Private Coaching: Make Sobriety Stick
https://www.makesobrietystick.com
Subscribe So You Don't Miss New Episodes!
Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Amazon Music, or you can stream it from my website HERE. 
You can also watch the interview on YouTube:
 

 

 
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast/id1212504521
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4I23r7DBTpT8XwUUwHRNpB
Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/a8eb438c-5af1-493b-99c1-f218e5553aff/the-one-day-at-a-time-recovery-podcast