How to Stay Human

The world feels intense right now.

From political shakeups to cultural instability, rapid AI acceleration to social unrest, many of us are asking the same question:

How do we stay informed without becoming overwhelmed?

How do we lead without burning out?

How do we stay human in the chaos?

In this episode of How to Stay Human, Tori Gordon and Kyle Herron explore the intersection of nervous system regulation, emotional intelligence, leadership, and sovereignty in a rapidly changing world.

This is a conversation about nervous system mastery, high performance without burnout, and why the next generation of leaders must be regulated leaders.

Tori shares the framework behind her 6-week transformational container, Groundwork, and explains why nervous system literacy is the foundation of sustainable success, emotional safety, intuitive leadership, and deep presence.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck in survival mode, constantly scanning for threat, or exhausted from pushing your way through life, this episode is for you.

In This Episode, We Cover:

How to balance staying informed with staying regulated

Chronic threat detection and hypervigilance in the digital age

Why hustle culture creates burnout and emotional disconnection

The Human Experience Map and the “Red Zone” of dysregulation

Emotional defense patterns: people pleasing, shutdown, lone wolf, stonewalling

Internal Family Systems (IFS) and parts work explained simply

How nervous system capacity expands abundance and opportunity

Why the future belongs to regulated leaders

Moving from survival mode to sovereignty

Sponsors

Anywhere Clinic

Virtual psychiatric care from licensed providers, including medication management and ketamine therapy options (where eligible).

Appointments can start as low as $120. Insurance may apply.

Learn more: anywhereclinic.com/tori-gordon

Function Health

Comprehensive lab testing that gives you real data on your health so you can make informed decisions about longevity, energy, and performance.

Explore your biomarkers with Function Health. Use code TORIG25 for $25 off your membership  www.functionhealth.com/torigordon

Ready to Go Deeper?

If this episode resonated, it may be time to build your internal foundation.

Groundwork is Tori Gordon’s 6-week nervous system mastery and emotional intelligence program designed for high performers, leaders, and impact-driven humans who are ready to move from survival to sovereignty.

Inside Groundwork, you’ll learn:

Nervous system literacy and stabilization

Emotional intelligence and trigger archetypes

Parts work and Internal Family Systems

Intuition and inner authority development

Practical tools to regulate in real time

Start with the free Nervous System Defense Patterns Quiz:

👉 www.torigordon.com/groundwork

Enrollment details and program information available at the same link.

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Everyone says they want community.
But most people don’t have it.
In this episode of How to Stay Human, Tori Gordon and Kyle Herron pick up where last week left off and break down why the word community has been diluted—and what it actually takes to build something real.
Community is not a follower count.
It’s not a group chat.
It’s not “good vibes.”
Real community is embodied, relational, and reciprocal. It requires participation, structure, boundaries, and repair. If it doesn’t ask anything from you, it’s not community—it’s proximity with branding.
Kyle shares a practical framework for building communities that last (paid or unpaid), including mission/vision, agreements, member selection, leadership, feedback loops, and the containers that create trust over time. Tori breaks down the biggest myths that cause people to crave community while resenting the effort it requires.
Because the future doesn’t need more online audiences.
It needs villages.
In this episode:
Why “community” has been watered down in the digital age
The truth: community is inconvenient by design
Why aligned communities still cost energy (and why that’s normal)
The myth that a community should meet all your needs
What makes communities fragile—and how to protect them
A step-by-step framework to build a real community where you live
Sponsors
Anywhere Clinic
Virtual psychiatric care from the comfort of your home. Support includes medication management and ketamine therapy options (where eligible). Appointments can start as low as $120. Check if your insurance covers it.
Visit: anywhereclinic.com/tori-gordon
Function Health
Get clear, comprehensive lab testing and real data on what’s happening inside your body so you can make smarter decisions with your health. USE CODE: TORIG25 for $25 off your membership. 
Learn more: FunctionHealth.com/torigordon
Follow + Listen
If this episode hit, follow the show and share it with one person you want to go deeper with this year.
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5CW60wbPxLzr5zOBRAB0jR?si=c1b37dab534a4704
YouTube: https://youtu.be/jber8KlebnU?si=HKmU-nUFX_X9vLad
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-stay-human/id1475408897?i=1000747092963

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In the most connected generation in human history, why are so many people quietly falling apart in isolation?
In this episode of How to Stay Human, Kyle and Tori unpack the loneliness epidemic—and why it’s not just a “sad feeling,” but a real threat to our physical health, mental wellbeing, and long-term resilience. If you’ve ever had a lot of people around you but still felt alone, this conversation is for you.
Kyle shares a shocking insight from a health longevity conversation: loneliness is one of the most lethal forces impacting human health today. Together, they explore how our culture has traded depth for breadth, why adult friendships often dissolve into “surface-level proximity,” and how social media can create a false sense of closeness that leaves us even more disconnected.
You’ll also learn a practical framework for rebuilding real connection: the Four Circles of Relationship—a way to map the people in your life so you know who is truly core, who is inner circle, who is outer circle, and who is simply an acquaintance. This episode invites you to stop taking friendship for granted and start treating your most important relationships with the same intention you give to your career, goals, and romantic partnerships.
Because real friendship isn’t something you “luck into.” It’s something you build—through consistency, vulnerability, reciprocity, and care.
In this episode, we cover:
Why loneliness impacts physical health (stress, cortisol, heart disease, and more)
The difference between being “connected” online and being known in real life
Why adult life makes friendship harder (survival mode, busyness, and the dopamine scroll)
A story that reveals how much we’ve confused audience for friendship
Why closeness isn’t history, proximity, blood, or nostalgia—it’s access + truth
The Four Circles of Relationship framework:
Acquaintances
Outer Circle
Inner Circle
Core (chosen family)
The real test of friendship: who answers when life falls apart
A powerful exercise to audit your relationships and name where dissonance exists
Why vulnerability is leadership—and why you can’t be loved if you can’t be seen
How deeper relationships become a form of resistance in a dividing world
Reflection prompts (take 2 minutes):
Who do I call when I’m not okay?
Who thinks they’re close to me… but doesn’t actually have access to my real life?
Which relationships am I maintaining out of habit, history, or image?
Who is on the edge of my outer/inner circle—and do I want to deepen it?
Sponsor: Anywhere Clinic
This episode is sponsored by Anywhere Clinic, a virtual mental health provider offering expert support from the comfort of your home. Whether you’re exploring ketamine therapy, need medication management, or want a supportive psychiatric guide, you can prioritize your mental health today.
Book an appointment for as low as $120 or check whether your insurance covers it at www.anywhereclinic.com/tori-gordon
What’s next
In the next episode, we go deeper into the how: how to build real community, what it means to be a good friend, and what sustainable connection actually requires.
If this episode hit home, share it with someone you love—and take one small step toward connection this week.

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If you’ve been feeling behind, stuck, or like your goals keep slipping through your fingers, this episode will reframe everything.
Tori shares her original framework, The 7 Seasons of Becoming Human, to help you identify where you are right now and stop forcing strategies that don’t match your current season. Because growth isn’t linear. You don’t “graduate” into constant momentum. You cycle. You rebuild. You reorient. And when you learn to work with your season instead of fighting it, your life gets clearer and more easeful.
Kyle joins as a student in the conversation, sharing real examples of moving through disruption, liminality, experimentation, devotion, and founding, and how seasons shape our ability to create goals that actually stick.
At the end, Tori shares how to take the 7 Seasons quiz and where to go deeper with the Substack series.
In this episode, we cover:
- Why “linear growth” is a myth (and what’s actually true)
- How to identify the season of life you’re in right now
- Why you can be in different seasons across different areas (business, health, relationships, faith)
The 7 Seasons breakdown:
Comfort (belonging, structure, conformity)
Disruption (initiation, rupture, awakening)
Liminality (the in-between, surrender, identity dissolving)
Discovery (curiosity, experimentation, aliveness)
Decision/Devotion (choice, integrity, cutting off other paths)
Founding (systems, discipline, sustainability)
Stewardship (legacy, service, wisdom)
- The question each season asks you (so you stop shaming yourself and start listening)
- How to stop “swimming upstream” with your goals
- Why your friends’ advice might be wrong for you (they’re often in a different season)
- How to communicate your season to your partner, friends, and team for better support
Resources mentioned:
Take the 7 Seasons of Becoming Human Quiz: https://torigordon.com/seven-seasons
Read the 7 Seasons Substack series: https://torigordon.substack.com
Contact: [email protected] or [email protected]
Sponsor: Anywhere Clinic
Today’s episode is sponsored by Anywhere Clinic — a mental health clinic offering a holistic approach to well-being with psychiatric care, medication management, ketamine therapy, TMS, talk therapy, and peak performance coaching. Anywhere Clinic supports anxiety, depression, ADHD, PTSD, insomnia, and more, with personalized care plans across multiple U.S. states.
If you’re looking for support that blends modern clinical care with a whole-human approach, check out Anywhere Clinic and explore their services.
Visit www.anywhereclinic.com/tori-gordon
If this episode helped you, subscribe for new weekly episodes of How to Stay Human.
Listen on Apple Podcasts and Spotify, or watch the full episode on YouTube.
And if you take the quiz, share what season you’re in — it changes how you set goals in 2026.

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As 2025 comes to a close, Kyle and Tori invite you into a more human way to plan your next chapter—one that honors your energy, your nervous system, and the natural rhythm of life.
We reflect on the state of humanity in 2025—polarization, system breakdowns, and the quiet revolution of people choosing a more conscious path. Then we shift into a practical framework for 2026: why New Year’s resolutions often fail, how winter is meant for reflection, and how to create goals that are simple, measurable, meaningful, and aligned with your inner authority.
Kyle shares the SMART goal framework, breaks goal-setting into personal vs. professional, and maps personal goals through the seven energetic bodies (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, primal, social, financial) plus life logistics. Tori grounds the conversation with the core reminder: don’t follow the crowd—follow your truth, your body, and your season of life.
If you’ve been forcing goals that don’t stick, this episode will give you a new map.
What You’ll Learn
How to reflect on 2025 using themes (integration, not pressure)
Why winter is for slowness, stillness, and intention-setting
How to create SMART goals that you can actually sustain
The seven energetic bodies goal framework (plus life logistics)
How to balance maintenance and experimentation
Why inner authority matters more than dogma
How to stop chasing someone else’s life and build your own
Sponsor: Anywhere Clinic
This episode is sponsored by Anywhere Clinic, a mental health clinic with a holistic approach to care, including psychiatric care, medication management, ketamine therapy, TMS, talk therapy, and family counseling.
Learn more / book a consult:  www.anywhereclinic.com/tori-gordon
Links
Substack: torigordon.substack.com
Instagram: @howtostayhumanpod @thetorigordon @kyleaherron
Website: torigordon.com

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.