In startup land, everyone acts like hiringâs a cheat code⊠âjust add a rockstar!â But what if that rockstar needs a brief for everything, tanks morale, or burns $280K on vaporware?In Episode 5 of UnicornPrn, Melissa and Lloyed discuss the hiring disasters that donât make it to TechCrunch, from corporate dinosaurs who canât function without minions to vibe hires who vanish before onboarding. In this episode, youâll learn:â Why early-stage hiring is high-stakes and emotionally loadedâ The common bad hire archetypes that will quietly (or loudly) kill your companyâ Red flag checklists to spot bad fits before they destroy your cultureâ When to hire, when to fire, and how to test-drive before you commitHot Takes: â âIf you keep hiring for tenure over trajectory, you will become the very thing you set out to disrupt.â â âYou need to think about hiring as a fiscally responsible decision.âGrab your popcorn (and maybe your severance template), because this oneâs loaded with red flags, cut-worthy hires, and savage founder truths that'll save your runway from going up in flames.Tune in. Wake up. Think hard. Build smart.Contact UnicornPrn Find show notes of each episode on UnicornPrn.com - hit subscribe like it owes you money About our hosts Melissa Kwan is Cofounder and CEO of eWebinar, and a 3X bootstrapper who has spent the last 14 years building companies without ever raising a cent of venture capital. Lloyed Lobo is a WSJ bestselling author, Cofounder of Boast.AI and Traction founder community, startup advisor, angel investor, board member, and LP in multiple VC funds â heâs seen startup chaos from both sides of the term sheet. LinkedIn: Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo Instagram: @themelissakwan and @lloyedloboâ â YouTube: @themlissakwan and @StartupTraction Subscribe to 'your founder next door' at melissakwan.com, Melissa's bi-monthly newsletter on how to build a company without an abundance of resources and fr...
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Episode 4: Founder or Fraudster - Con Artists In The Boardroom
In the startup world, everyone preaches âfake it till you make itâ. But what happens when faking it goes too far? Are you a bold founder hustling to realize a big vision, or a fraudster selling pipe dreams and ending up in handcuffs? In Episode 4 of UnicornPrn, Melissa and Lloyed pull back the curtain on the dark side of startup hustle â when âfake it till you make itâ turns into outright fraud. They swap war stories of con artists in the boardroom, from fake user accounts and phantom revenue to corporate espionage straight out of a spy thriller. In this episode, youâll learn:â Why startup cultureâs obsession with unicorn status pushes founders to flirt with fraud (and sometimes marry it)â Unicorn Hall of Shameâ Common lies founders love to tell (until they can't)â Red flag checklists for founders, investors, and employees to spot BS before it blows upâ Frameworks for ethical âfake it till you make itâHot Takes:â "You donât need to lie, you can fake it ethically with Wizard of Oz MVP or no-code."â "Donât be enamored by fraudsters. That quick win can become the fastest path to jail."Grab your popcorn (and maybe a notepad), because this oneâs full of đmemes, spicy insights, and hard-earned lessons for anyone in startup land.Tune in. Wake up. Think hard. Build smart.Contact UnicornPrn Find show notes of each episode on UnicornPrn.com - hit subscribe like it owes you money About our hosts Melissa Kwan is Cofounder and CEO of eWebinar, and a 3X bootstrapper who has spent the last 14 years building companies without ever raising a cent of venture capital. Lloyed Lobo is a WSJ bestselling author, Cofounder of Boast.AI and Traction founder community, startup advisor, angel investor, board member, and LP in multiple VC funds â heâs seen startup chaos from both sides of the term sheet. LinkedIn: Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo Instagram: @themelissakwan and @lloyedloboâ â YouTube: @themlissakwan and @StartupTraction Subscribe to 'your founder next door' at melissakwan.com, Melissa's bi-monthly newsletter on how to build a company without an abundance of resources and fr...
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Episode 3: Venture Capital is a Giant Ponzi Scheme
Is venture capital the fuel behind world-changing innovationâŠor just a glorified pyramid scheme where everyoneâs pretending theyâre building the next Uber while actually praying for a higher valuation before the money runs out?In this spicy episode of UnicornPrn, Melissa and Lloyed expose how the game is played â founders chasing funding like junkies, markups for AI buzzwords duct-taped to a landing page, unicorn markdowns like itâs Black Friday, and accelerators slapping lipstick on broken products for Demo Day.Highlights:Why VC math makes founders lie to themselves (and investors)The billion-dollar valuation addictionâand whoâs really winningThe culture of secondary exits, fake wins, and quiet shutdownsWhat happens when the market corrects and the music stopsThe NEW Startup Operating SystemHot Takes:âA startup that needs constant funding to survive isnât building... Itâs bleeding.ââMore startups die of indigestion than starvation.âThe startup game is rigged. This episode hands you the playbook they don't want you to read.Tune in. Wake up. Think hard. Build smart.Contact UnicornPrn Find show notes of each episode on UnicornPrn.com - hit subscribe like it owes you money About our hosts Melissa Kwan is Cofounder and CEO of eWebinar, and a 3X bootstrapper who has spent the last 14 years building companies without ever raising a cent of venture capital. Lloyed Lobo is a WSJ bestselling author, Cofounder of Boast.AI and Traction founder community, startup advisor, angel investor, board member, and LP in multiple VC funds â heâs seen startup chaos from both sides of the term sheet. LinkedIn: Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo Instagram: @themelissakwan and @lloyedloboâ â YouTube: @themlissakwan and @StartupTraction Subscribe to 'your founder next door' at melissakwan.com, Melissa's bi-monthly newsletter on how to build a company without an abundance of resources and fr...
Startups are messy. But cofounder relationships? Even messier. In this brutally honest episode of UnicornPrn, Melissa and Lloyed dive into the raw, real, and often ridiculous world of cofounder dynamicsâfrom love stories gone wrong to business partnerships built on shaky foundations.They read founder DMs and dissect juicy, anonymized tales of startup breakups, equity disputes, silent resentment, power struggles, and control freaks who hoard all the glory. Nothing is off-limits.Whether your cofounder is your best friend, life partner, or someone you met at a hackathon, this episode will either save your relationship or confirm that itâs time to walk away.Highlights:The equity conversation youâre avoiding (but must have ASAP)How to vet a technical cofounder before giving up your cap tableReal stories: cofounder ghosting, solo resentment, side gigs, and betrayalWho should be CEO (Hint: itâs not the one who bought the domain)Managing burnout, power dynamics, and communication breakdownsHot takes:âCofounder breakups make divorces look polite. Paper it before the kumbaya fades.ââYou donât need chemistry. You need someone who answers emails and doesnât ghost on deadline day.ââMost cofounder drama starts with unclear roles and ends with legal fees.âIf youâre carrying the company and theyâre carrying their ego⊠this episode might save your sanity (and your cap table).Listen. Cringe. Reflect. Maybe renegotiate your equity split.Contact UnicornPrn Find show notes of each episode on UnicornPrn.com - hit subscribe like it owes you money About our hosts Melissa Kwan is Cofounder and CEO of eWebinar, and a 3X bootstrapper who has spent the last 14 years building companies without ever raising a cent of venture capital. Lloyed Lobo is a WSJ bestselling author, Cofounder of Boast.AI and Traction founder community, startup advisor, angel investor, board member, and LP in multiple VC funds â heâs seen startup chaos from both sides of the term sheet. LinkedIn: Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo Instagram: @themelissakwan and @lloyedloboâ â YouTube: @themlissakwan and @StartupTraction Subscribe to 'your founder next door' at melissakwan.com, Melissa's bi-monthly newsletter on how to build a company without an abundance of resources and fr...
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Episode 1: The Internet is for UnicornPrn
Welcome to the very first episode of UnicornPrn, the only podcast that peels back the glossy veneer of startup life and roasts it over a flaming pile of pitch decks.Hosted by Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo, two founder friends whoâve seen the startup world from the inside out, upside down, and on fire⊠weâre here to talk about what itâs actually like to build a company (spoiler: itâs not all oat milk lattes and billion-dollar exits).In this episode, we dive into the unicorn myth â how it hijacked foundersâ brains, turned venture capital into a fix more addictive than doomscrolling, and what no one tells you before you sign that first term sheet and trade your sanity (and maybe your weekends, your marriage, and your gut health).Highlights:How chasing unicorns became a socially acceptable addictionOur own founder delusions, burnout, and near-glorious meltdownsWhy fundraising is a lifestyle trap disguised as ambitionThe brutal math of dilution, valuation, and exitsWhat real success looks likeâspoiler: itâs not always on TechCrunchHot Takes:âIf you need a $100M raise to feel worthy, therapyâs cheaper.ââVC money gives you runway and a front-row seat to everyone elseâs expectations.ââThink youâre the player, but donât know the rules? Youâre the entertainment.âIf your days are spent pitching, posting, and pretending everythingâs fine... youâre not alone.Listen. Question. Reflect. Rethink.Contact UnicornPrn Find show notes of each episode on UnicornPrn.com - hit subscribe like it owes you money About our hosts Melissa Kwan is Cofounder and CEO of eWebinar, and a 3X bootstrapper who has spent the last 14 years building companies without ever raising a cent of venture capital. Lloyed Lobo is a WSJ bestselling author, Cofounder of Boast.AI and Traction founder community, startup advisor, angel investor, board member, and LP in multiple VC funds â heâs seen startup chaos from both sides of the term sheet. LinkedIn: Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo Instagram: @themelissakwan and @lloyedloboâ â YouTube: @themlissakwan and @StartupTraction Subscribe to 'your founder next door' at melissakwan.com, Melissa's bi-monthly newsletter on how to build a company without an abundance of resources and fr...
UnicornPrn is the only podcast that peels back the glossy veneer of startup life and roasts it over a flaming pile of pitch decks đ„Hosted by Melissa Kwan and Lloyed Lobo, two founder friends whoâve seen the startup world from the inside out, upside down, and fully on fire. This show dives into what itâs actually like to build a company (spoiler: itâs not all oat milk lattes and billion-dollar exits).We riff about all the things you wish you could say out loud but canât (or wonât) â like investor horror stories, founder mistakes, and bloated valuations.đ„ About our hostsMelissa Kwan is the Cofounder and CEO of eWebinar, and a 3-time bootstrapped founder whoâs spent the last 14 years building companies without ever raising a cent of venture capital. Follow @themelissakwan on Instagram and Melissa Kwan on LinkedInâ â for tactical advice on bootstrapping. Subscribe to 'â â your founder next doorâ â ' at melissakwan.com, Melissa's bi-monthly newsletter on how to build a company without an abundance of resources and friends in high places.Lloyed Lobo is a WSJ bestselling author of From Grassroots to Greatness, Cofounder of Boast.AI, and Cofounder of the Traction community. After a career in VC-backed startups, he helped bootstrap Boast.AI to eight-figure revenue, and has since served as a startup advisor, angel investor, board member, and LP in multiple VC funds â so heâs seen startup chaos from both sides of the term sheet. Follow @lloyedlobo on â â Instagramâ â for daily business content.Â