
164 - Why Small Things Make You So Angry
20/12/2025 | 10 mins.
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.It’s often not the big things that make you angry. It’s the small stuff that hijacks your day. In this thoughtful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores why seemingly minor annoyances can trigger such big reactions, and how learning to let go of them can radically improve your relationships, your mood and your life.Key Takeaways:-Small events like a comment or forgotten chore often trigger anger because of deeper emotional patterns.-Reacting in the heat of the moment usually leads to regret. Pausing first gives you power.-Asking, “Will this matter in a week or a year?” helps you gain perspective and avoid overreacting.-Practicing gratitude can rewire your brain to focus on what really matters, not petty irritations.-Recognising life’s fragility can shift your focus from frustration to compassion and connection.Links referenced in this episode:angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger managementangersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycleangersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

163 - The Four Hidden Killers of Your Relationship
13/12/2025 | 12 mins.
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.Most relationships don’t fall apart in one explosive moment. They unravel quietly through patterns we barely notice. In this eye-opening episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals the four hidden killers that silently destroy relationships from the inside out. If your connection with your partner feels colder, more distant or just off, this episode might explain why, and what you can do about it.Key Takeaways:-Criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling are four of the most destructive behaviors in relationships.-These patterns often feel normal, but over time they erode trust, love and emotional safety.-Each “killer” has an antidote, like appreciation, responsibility or effective communication that can rebuild connection.-Anger often fuels these behaviors, making anger management a crucial step toward healthier relationships.-By learning to recognise and replace these patterns, you can stop the slow drift apart and bring warmth and closeness back into your relationship.Links referenced in this episode:angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger managementangersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycleangersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

162 - Why Active Listening Could Save Your Relationship
06/12/2025 | 11 mins.
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.Ever feel like you and your partner are speaking different languages, even when you're in the same room? In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals why active listening is the missing link in most relationships, and how mastering it can bring you closer than ever before. If you’re tired of arguments that go nowhere, this episode offers a better way forward.Key Takeaways:-Active listening means being fully present, not planning your reply while your partner is still talking.-It’s not about winning the conversation; it’s about making your partner feel truly heard and understood.-Four core skills: Minimal encouragers, open-ended questions, reflecting and positive feedback can transform the way you communicate.-Simple changes in how you listen can open up emotional connection and reduce defensiveness.-Practicing these skills builds trust, de-escalates conflict and strengthens your relationship at its core.Links referenced in this episode:angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger managementangersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycleangersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

161 - The Real Reasons People Decide to Control Their Anger
29/11/2025 | 9 mins.
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.After an anger outburst, the silence can feel unbearable. In this heartfelt episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals the one essential ingredient most people overlook when trying to change: a powerful personal “why.” Through real stories from men and women just like you, this episode will help you uncover the deeper reason you want to control your anger, and help you finally break free from the cycle for good.Key Takeaways:-Change only lasts when it’s driven by a deeper purpose, not just guilt or willpower.-Real-life stories show that many people want to control their anger for their families, their children, or their sense of self-respect.-Identifying your personal “why” gives you strength in tough moments and keeps you committed to growth.-Anger can destroy relationships. But with a clear reason to change, you can rebuild connection and trust.-Your “why” must be stronger than your anger to truly transform your life.Links referenced in this episode:angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger managementangersecrets.com/training — Breaking The Anger Cycleangersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

160 - Why Defensiveness Is Silently Destroying Your Relationship
22/11/2025 | 9 mins.
For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.Have you ever found yourself in an argument before you even realise what triggered it? In this powerful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores how defensiveness quietly damages relationships, and how you can stop it. Learn why your instinct to defend yourself often masks deeper fears, and how choosing connection over combat can transform your relationship.Key Takeaways:-Defensiveness often stems from the fear that we're to blame, even when we don’t want to admit it.-The key to change is awareness: notice your emotional triggers before reacting.-Taking even partial responsibility can immediately diffuse tension and build trust.-Empathy transforms conflict: put yourself in your partner’s shoes to respond with care, not combat.-Honest, calm communication breaks the cycle of blame and opens the door to healing.-Change won’t happen overnight, but with intention and practice, defensiveness can be replaced by understanding.Links referenced in this episode:angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger managementangersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycleangersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System



Anger Secrets