Anger Secrets

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs walks through seven signs that anger may be a real problem in your life - and what you can do about it. Whether it's a short fuse, constant irritability or a partner who walks on eggshells around you, these signs are worth taking seriously. And the good news is that recognising them is the first step toward change.
This episode is for anyone who suspects their anger is affecting their relationships, their wellbeing or the people they love most, but isn't quite sure where to start.
Key Takeaways:
Anger itself isn't the problem. The problem is when it starts expressing itself in ways that hurt you or the people around you.
Your body knows you're angry before your mind does. Learning to read your physical warning signs early is often the difference between staying in control and losing it.
Regularly regretting what you say or do after an anger episode is a clear signal your anger is getting ahead of you.
Holding grudges hurts you more than anyone else. Forgiveness benefits the person who gives it far more than the person who receives it.
If your partner walks on eggshells around you, that's a sign - and it's fixable, faster than most people expect.
Constant low-level irritability is often anger simmering beneath the surface. Gratitude is a genuine and practical antidote.
If someone who cares about you has told you that you have an anger problem, take it seriously. It took courage for them to say it.

Resources & Next Steps:
If you'd like to understand whether anger is an issue for you:
Take the free Anger Quiz: angersecrets.com/anger-quiz
Visit: angersecrets.com
Book a free 30-minute phone call
Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle"

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs talks with Fiona - a small business owner and mother who grew up surrounded by family violence and spent years struggling with anger in her marriage. Just seven weeks into the Complete Anger Management System, Fiona has already made remarkable progress. Her husband has noticed. She has noticed. And the insight that changed everything for her was surprisingly simple.
If you've ever felt stuck in patterns that stretch back to your childhood, Fiona's story will show you what's possible, and how quickly things can shift when you focus on what you can actually control.
Key Takeaways:
You can't change other people, but you can change how you respond to them. That single realisation was Fiona's turning point.
Learning to use the Tension Scale early is one of the most powerful anger management skills. Catching anger before it peaks creates a window for a different choice.
The thoughts and feelings model works beyond just anger. It helps you respond differently in all kinds of difficult situations.
Change doesn't have to be public. Fiona worked through the course privately, on her own schedule, without anyone needing to know.
Progress isn't perfect, but it is real. Seven weeks in, Fiona hadn't had a significant anger episode since starting the course.

Resources & Next Steps:
If you'd like support controlling your anger and building calmer, more loving relationships:
Visit: angersecrets.com
Book a free 30-minute phone call
Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle"

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs shares five practical ways to respond when someone else's anger is directed at you. Whether it's a partner who explodes, a colleague who unloads or a family member who pushes your buttons, how you respond in those moments matters more than you might think.
Rather than fighting back or shutting down, Alastair explains how staying calm, using empathy and setting clear boundaries can completely change the dynamic, without accepting blame or tolerating abuse.
Key Takeaways:
You staying calm is the most powerful thing in the room. Responding with your own anger only escalates the situation. Managing your nervous system first changes everything.
Most of the time, someone else's anger isn't really about you. Recognising this creates distance from the heat and prevents unnecessary conflict.
Anger is usually just the surface. Underneath it is almost always something softer - hurt, fear, or feeling unheard. Empathy shifts the conversation faster than any argument.
Boundaries aren't threats. A calm, clear statement of what you will and won't accept creates more safety in a relationship, not less.
If what you're experiencing crosses into abuse, verbal, emotional, or physical, these tips aren't enough. Real support is needed, and your safety always comes first.

Resources & Next Steps:
If you'd like support handling anger, yours or someone else's, and building calmer, more loving relationships:
Visit: angersecrets.com
Book a free 30-minute phone call
Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle"

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs shares three practical steps to help you control your anger before it takes over. If you've ever said something you regret in the heat of the moment, or felt like your anger erupts before you even realise what's happening, this episode explains exactly why that happens and what you can do about it starting today.
Rather than offering generic advice like "count to ten" or "take a deep breath," Alastair breaks down the real mechanics of anger: why it escalates so fast, what's actually driving it beneath the surface and how better communication can transform even the most stuck relationship patterns.
Key Takeaways:
You can't control your anger if you don't know it's happening. Learning to spot your personal early warning signs before anger peaks is the most important first step.
Your anger isn't caused by what happens to you. It's caused by what you think about what happens to you. Changing the thought changes the response.
Beneath every repeated trigger is usually a rigid belief, and once you can see it clearly, you can begin to shift it.
Active listening is one of the most powerful anger management tools in relationships. When people feel truly heard, defensiveness drops and real conversations become possible.
These are skills, not personality traits. They get easier with practice.

Resources & Next Steps:
If you'd like support controlling your anger and building calmer, more loving relationships:
Visit: angersecrets.com
Book a free 30-minute phone call
Access the free training on "Breaking The Anger Cycle"

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com.
Have you ever promised yourself you’d stay calm with your kids only to find yourself yelling anyway when your patience runs out? You try the usual parenting tips, counting to ten or staying positive, but in the moment none of it seems to work.
In this episode of The Anger Secrets Podcast, anger expert Alastair Duhs explains why most discipline advice fails when emotions are already high, and what actually works instead.
You’ll learn how your internal emotional state plays a bigger role than your child’s behaviour, and how small changes in awareness, communication and structure can transform discipline from reactive to calm and effective.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
-Why your child’s behaviour isn’t the real cause of your anger
-How stress and unprocessed emotions influence your reactions
-The importance of clear expectations instead of vague rules
-How noticing positive behaviour reduces conflict over time
-Why empathy helps children calm down faster without removing boundaries
-When and how to take a timeout yourself to prevent escalation
Want help with this?
If you’re tired of yelling and want practical tools to stay calm and connected with your kids, support is available:
-Watch the free training on Breaking The Anger Cycle
-Book a free 30-minute Anger Assessment Call
-Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System