Kids with Big Emotions Podcast

• 110 Understanding Your Child’s Stress Animal Is the Key to Calmer Days

  Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.comSupport Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessmentBook a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall If you’ve ever found yourself asking, “Why is nothing working?” when your child is melting down, this episode is for you.In today’s episode, Andi introduces the concept of Stress Animals—a powerful and accessible framework to help parents decode their child’s behavior in moments of emotional overwhelm. You’ll learn how to spot the early signs of dysregulation, understand your child’s stress response, and most importantly, how to shift your own energy so you can help your child return to calm.Key Takeaways:Every child has a unique stress response—and it’s not about bad behavior, it’s about nervous system overload.The Stress Animal framework (Dolphin, Shark, Turtle, Clownfish) helps parents identify how their child reacts to stress—and how to support them accordingly.Your own stress animal matters too. The way you react can either soothe or escalate your child’s stress state.You can’t connect through correction. Lasting change happens when you meet your child’s stress with the kind of connection they need.Regulation before resolution: Problem-solving comes after calming the nervous system—never during a meltdown.Episode Highlights & Timestamps:[00:00] Introduction – What to expect & why this matters[02:00] Why traditional strategies fail with dysregulated kids[05:00] The biology of stress – nervous system states explained[06:45] Introducing the Stress Animals: Dolphin – The regulated, connected state Shark – Explosive, reactive energy Turtle – Shut-down, withdrawn, retreating energy Clownfish – Anxious, people-pleasing, over-worrying[11:00] How your stress animal impacts your child’s response[13:30] Why we don’t want to be in dolphin all the time[14:00] Matching your response to your child’s stress animal[15:00] Real-life examples: what worked, what didn’t, and why[20:00] Supporting the nervous system through grounding tools[21:00] One family’s story: shifting from Clownfish to quiet presence[22:00] Final thoughts – Why this approach changes everything✨ You’re not expected to get this right every time. But every step toward understanding helps build the connection your child needs to feel safe and supported.

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• 109 From Perfectionism and High Achievement with Jenn Abbatiello

  Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.comSupport Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessmentBook a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall Parenting isn’t just about raising our kids—it’s also about healing ourselves. In this powerful conversation, Jenn Abbatiello shares her journey from perfectionism and high achievement to learning how to parent with connection, grace, and calm. Together, we dive deep into how generational patterns shape our parenting styles, how to navigate grief and guilt in motherhood, and what it really takes to build a joyful, connected family—without losing yourself in the process.Whether you're feeling burnt out, stuck in old ways, or unsure how to support your child without repeating the past, this episode will help you feel seen, understood, and ready for change.Key TakeawaysParenting often brings us to our breaking point—but it’s also an opportunity for transformation.Grief is a natural part of parenting—especially when letting go of our “old life.”You can love your children and miss the life you had before. Both can be true.Punishment and disconnection aren't the only tools. Understanding leads to true change.Kids don’t need us to be perfect—they need us to be regulated and real.We can’t support our children in becoming their true selves if we haven’t done the work ourselves.Episode Highlights00:00 – Meet Jenn Abbatiello: Her story of shifting from corporate success to parenting transformation02:00 – What it feels like to lose joy in motherhood—and why it’s so common04:30 – Mourning your old life and learning to live in the and06:15 – The “stoic badge of honor” and how emotions come roaring in with motherhood10:15 – Why gentle parenting gets misinterpreted—and how to define consequences with compassion12:30 – A real-life example of consequences vs. punishment with Jenn’s child14:00 – Andi’s story about her son, Pokémon, and helping him take ownership16:00 – What schools miss: Executive functioning, stress, and the root cause of meltdowns17:45 – What to do during a meltdown vs. after a meltdown20:30 – Why your child’s behavior triggers you—and what that means for your healing22:00 – Jenn’s story of colic, control, and generational expectations25:30 – The parenting puzzle: So many pieces, and why healing yourself matters27:00 – Letting your child be themself—and why that requires your own growth30:00 – Living someone else's dream vs. letting your kids follow their own34:00 – Childhood programming, identity, and subconscious stories36:00 – Andi’s IFS story: How one childhood memory created a lifelong belief39:00 – Why self-care isn’t selfish—and how to do it in your current season42:00 – Jenn’s encouragement for parents feeling stuck or overwhelmedResources MentionedJenn Abbatiello’s free email series: Name: 3 Critical Steps to...

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• 108 Beyond Behavior: What’s Really Going On

  Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.comSupport Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessmentBook a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall If your child has ever been labeled as dramatic, difficult, or lazy… this episode is for you. Andi breaks down the most common behaviors reported by over 60 parents who filled out the Kids With Big Emotions Self-Assessment—and reveals what’s really going on underneath.This isn’t just about behavior. It’s about root causes, hidden struggles, and executive functioning challenges that often get missed in schools and misunderstood at home.Key TakeawaysBehavior is the tip of the iceberg—executive functioning is often what’s underneath.Kids aren’t being difficult on purpose. They’re often overwhelmed, misunderstood, or unsupported in key areas of brain development.Sensitivities to sound, clothing, and transitions may be signs of deeper processing challenges or superpowers that need support to shine.Many kids labeled as lazy, disorganized, or disruptive actually have struggles with working memory, attention, or impulse control.Shifting from judgment to curiosity helps uncover patterns and truly support your child’s needs.The self-assessment form is a powerful first step to uncover what’s going on beneath the surface.Episode Highlights & Timestamps[00:00] Welcome & overview of the parent self-assessment results[02:00] What 66 parents revealed—140 out of 180 average checkmarks[03:00] Big emotions, meltdowns, impulse struggles—what the numbers say[04:00] Why behavior-based discipline often misses the real problem[05:00] Sensory sensitivity as a superpower—and why it needs support[06:45] Trouble learning from mistakes? This might be why.[08:00] Why schools often miss what’s really going on[09:15] From behavior to brain: what to look for underneath[10:30] Start tracking patterns—what triggers overwhelm or shutdowns[12:00] Writing struggles, masking, and misunderstood learning differences[13:30] Why executive functioning assessments matter[14:30] What to say instead of “Why didn’t you do this?”[15:15] Helping your child feel understood and supported[16:00] Speaking the language of executive functioning in IEPs[17:00] Concrete examples: working memory, impulsivity, perception[18:00] Tools, links, and next steps for parents ready to dig deeperResources MentionedKids With Big Emotions Self-Assessment: Click here to get the form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessmentExecutive Functioning Podcast SeriesEp. 85 Perception: Emotional Regulation

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• 107 Finding Strength in the Everyday with Rose Couse

  Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.comSupport Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessmentBook a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall In this heart-opening conversation, I’m joined by an early childhood expert, parent coach, and grandma Rose Couse. With over 40 years of experience supporting kids, educators, and families, Rose shares powerful insights on parenting through grief, the true meaning of self-care, and how to shift from judgment to compassion in your parenting journey.We talk about the invisible load parents carry, the guilt that often surrounds taking time for ourselves, and how small, daily moments of awareness can help us better connect with our kids—and ourselves.Key TakeawaysSelf-care isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity for parenting with presence and compassion.Awareness of your internal experience is key to helping your child regulate theirs.Regulation is contagious—your nervous system affects your child’s.Grief, stress, and trauma show up in parenting in subtle and powerful ways.You’re doing better than you think. Shifting your inner dialogue can change how you show up.Episode Highlights00:00 – Welcome and guest intro02:00 – Rose’s journey from early childhood educator to parent coach04:00 – The biggest surprise of parenting: It’s not just about the kids06:30 – Why parents need self-awareness to parent well08:15 – Parenting through grief and the invisible fear of not doing “enough”10:45 – Breaking generational patterns of putting yourself last12:30 – Why we admire others’ strength but struggle to see our own14:45 – The healing power of community and connection17:30 – What real self-care looks like (hint: it’s not bubble baths)20:15 – Understanding the “body budget” and parenting under stress23:30 – Why breathing for 12 minutes a day changes your brain27:15 – Simple grounding tools in the middle of chaos30:00 – Modeling emotional awareness for your kids32:30 – Joy as a parenting practice36:00 – The importance of celebrating small wins39:00 – Helping kids notice their own body signals and emotions42:00 – Three questions to ground yourself in hard parenting moments44:00 – Final thoughts and how to connect with RoseResources MentionedRose’s blog + parent coaching: http://www.rmcouse.ca/ Robin Gobbel – trauma-informed parenting educator: robingobbel.comAmishi Jha’s work on attention and focus – including her breathing practice researchLisa Feldman Barrett’s “body budget” concept – from How Emotions Are MadeRick Hanson’s “Velcro vs. Teflon” idea – from Hardwiring HappinessIf this episode...

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• 106 When the ‘Good’ Kid Isn’t Fine

  Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.comSupport Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessmentBook a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall Sometimes the child who seems “fine” — quiet, cooperative, and academically strong — is actually the one silently struggling. In this deeply personal episode, Andi shares what she recently discovered about her one son's hidden stress responses and executive functioning challenges, despite being the so-called “easy” kid of her two kids. She walks through the emotional rollercoaster of guilt, the importance of slowing down, and how “doing well” on paper doesn't always mean everything is okay underneath.Key TakeawaysJust because a child is quiet, compliant, or “gifted” doesn’t mean they aren’t struggling emotionally or cognitively.The turtle stress response (shutdown, avoidance, compliance) can hide significant executive functioning challenges.It’s easy to skip foundational skills when we’re anxious to “fix” the problem — even when we know better.Support begins with understanding where your child is truly struggling, not just reacting to behavior.Academic success doesn’t automatically reflect emotional regulation or executive functioning strength.Slowing down and building skills step-by-step is the real shortcut to lasting change.Episode Highlights[00:01:00] – What it means when the “good kid” isn’t actually fine[00:03:00] – The gifted child who won the “Silent but Deadly” award — and what it masked[00:05:00] – Signs of executive functioning struggles hiding beneath compliance[00:07:00] – When guilt kicks in: The parenting moment Andi didn’t expect[00:09:00] – Why compassion and collaboration beats punishment[00:10:00] – Learning ladders: Meeting kids where they’re actually at[00:13:00] – Helping kids in school when executive functioning is the issue[00:15:00] – Real-life changes that helped Andi’s son thrive[00:17:00] – Reframing school as executive functioning training[00:20:00] – A focus tool from Peak Mind by Amishi Jha that actually worked[00:21:00] – Letting go of grades as the only measure of success[00:23:00] – Why helping your child succeed means seeing what’s really going onResources MentionedBook: Peak Mind by Dr. Amishi Jha – A science-based guide to improving focus and attention: https://amishi.com/books/peak-mindSelf-Assessment Form – Understand hidden executive functioning and emotional struggles: Click here to access: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

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