ADHD was there all along - even if nobody noticed the signs
Maybe no one saw the signs when you were a child.
Maybe you didn’t either - not until the burnout hit, the wheels came off, and everything started to feel unmanageable with the school admin, your next big work deadline and the brain fog of perimenopause.
This episode is for the women who have spent years masking, pushing through, and wondering why life still feels so hard.
You got the grades.
You looked like you were coping.
You held it all together on the outside.
But inside?
You were overwhelmed. Overthinking. Hiding the chaos.
And no one ever called it ADHD.
In this episode, I talk about the fear so many women bring into ADHD assessments — the worry that it won’t “count” if nobody noticed it when you were a child.
We’ll explore:
What childhood ADHD symptoms actually look like — especially in girls and high achievers
Why ADHD often goes undiagnosed until adulthood
The emotional rollercoaster of being “on it” one day and burnt out the next
How masking makes it harder to recognise (even in yourself)
Why it’s not too late — and you’re not too much
Because this isn’t about how well you performed.
It’s about how you felt.
And if the signs were there all along - you deserve to understand them now.
Book a call with Michaela to talk about ADHD assessment, therapy or coaching:
Michaela Thomas - ADHD Assessment clarity call | TidyCal
DM Michaela on Instagram with your questions: www.instagram.com/the_thomas_connection
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19:01
ADHD, trauma, or both? with Dr Kara Davey
In this episode of the Pause Purpose Play podcast, host Michaela Thomas interviews Dr. Kara Davey, an award-winning clinical psychologist, discussing the complex relationship between ADHD and trauma. They explore how trauma is both common in ADHD and can be distinguished from it, emphasising the importance of a thorough assessment. Dr. Davey shares her own experiences with late ADHD diagnosis following a traumatic stillbirth and how both personal and professional paths led to her passion for this field. They also discuss the challenges late-diagnosed adults face, especially women, and how postnatal periods can trigger or exacerbate ADHD symptoms. Michaela and Kara underline the significance of a compassionate and detailed assessment process and delve into the effectiveness of EMDR therapy for trauma, particularly within the neurodivergent community.
https://linktr.ee/drdaveyADHDcoaching
https://linktr.ee/alwaysinmyheart
https://www.drdaveycoaching.com/adhd
https://www.karaclinicalpsychologistinsussex.co.uk/about-us/
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1:04:26
The ‘Hindered Genius’ of ADHD: When you can write a book but lose your keys
Ever felt like you can run a team, lead a business, or write a book - yet somehow can’t manage to return a library book or put your laundry away?
In this episode of Pause Purpose Play, I’m digging into the hidden paradox so many women with ADHD face: outward success with chaos underneath the surface.
You’ll hear personal reflections and real client stories that reveal how executive dysfunction can sit alongside brilliance, not in opposition to it.
I’ll walk you through:
Why some of the smartest, most capable women struggle with the "simplest" tasks
The emotional toll of being misunderstood (by others and yourself)
How I approach ADHD assessments with both compassion and clinical conscientiousness
If you’ve ever wondered, “How can I be this competent and still feel like I can't do adulting?” - this one’s for you. Let’s explore what’s really going on beneath the surface, and why a deeper, more personalised understanding of ADHD can be a game changer... because you can be smart and successful, and still ADHD.
www.thethomasconnection.co.uk/adhdclub to join other brilliant ADHD women
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Journaling for ADHDers, with The Evolve Journey
In this episode of the Pause Purpose Play podcast, host Michaela Thomas welcomes the founders of the Evolve Journal, Sam and Freddy Titcombe. They discuss the development of the Evolve Journal, a tool designed to help people live with more intention, clarity, and consistency by focusing on manageable progress rather than perfection. Sam and Freddy share insights on building healthy journaling habits, the importance of self-kindness, and the value of stoicism in daily life. The conversation highlights the balance of emotional reflection with practical goal-setting, addressing how to manage AHDH traits and the challenges of maintaining consistency. They also touch on the four fundamental pillars of happiness—health, wealth, relationships, and freedom—and provide practical tips for integrating them into daily life. The episode concludes with advice on giving yourself permission to make mistakes and continue striving for growth.
Join the waitlist for the next Burn Bright cohort here: www.thethomasconnection.co.uk/burn-bright
Find the Evolve Journal here: https://www.evolvejourney.co.uk/
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1:03:07
Squirming at praise: Can you take a compliment?
In this solo episode, Michaela explores the discomfort many of us feel when receiving compliments - especially when we’re wired for self-criticism, perfectionism, or modesty.
Sharing a personal story from LinkedIn, she unpacks why our inner critics hate being seen and how we can respond with compassionate curiosity instead of avoidance. This episode is for anyone who’s ever cringed at being praised and wants to learn how to receive kindness more fully - without shame or self-doubt.
You’ll hear about:
Why compliments can trigger our inner critic
How upbringing and culture shape our ability to receive kindness
Michaela’s personal experience of public praise on LinkedIn
The two-step process of compassion: sense-making + action-taking
How to lead with vulnerability while staying grounded in your values
Resources mentioned:
Follow Lauren O’Carroll on LinkedIn
Learn more about ADHD coaching for women: The Thomas Connection
Work with Michaela:
Feeling called to be more visible - but scared of the inner backlash? Get in touch for 1:1 coaching or find out more about my programmes for neurodivergent women leaders.
Imagine if you could follow your ambition without drowning in it – how much more fulfilling life would be? That’s what Pause Purpose Play is all about – finding balance over burnout by setting you free from needing to be perfect, so that you can take action and get started with what matters to you, instead of getting stuck in procrastination and holding yourself back with self-limiting beliefs your inner critic tells you.
In this podcast, Michaela Thomas, Clinical Psychologist, Couples Therapist and founder of The Thomas Connection, shares bite-sized learning around psychology of performance, habits, self-confidence, stress, anxiety, perfectionism, parenthood and couples relationships.
The podcast will mix solo episodes with guest interviews; diving deep into their professional zone of genius and learning about how they have found pause, purpose and play in their life and in their work.
My new book, The Lasting Connection, is available now from all good bookshops.
Ireland