Coaching Culture with Ben Herring

A captain’s job gets real when the message is hard and the stakes are higher than one person’s pride. Jamie Henry joins us to talk about the uncomfortable side of professional rugby: selection, disappointment, and the quiet way a results-driven environment can make players feel like decisions are personal. We dig into what actually earns respect inside strong teams, why “no one is bigger than the team” only works when it shows up in daily behavior, and how leaders keep trust intact when not everyone gets what they want. 

Jamie’s story runs through Japanese rugby culture, where respect, elders, and the group come first. He shares how the senpai kohai dynamic shaped him, and why he chose to redefine respect on the field as full-blooded effort, not hesitation. That one shift has big implications for multicultural squads, communication under pressure, and building a shared standard without erasing anyone’s identity. 

Then we go deep on the Asia Pacific Lions, a new Asia Pacific rugby project designed to create real professional rugby pathways for Asian players outside Japan. Jamie explains the mission, what it is like captaining a team that includes seasoned international stars, and how the Lions pulled off an inaugural match in Colombo, Sri Lanka against Northampton Saints. We also explore Sri Lanka as an underrated rugby hotbed and what success should look like ten years from now: Asian players earning chances in top leagues because this platform existed. 

If you care about rugby leadership, team culture, and growing the game across Asia, hit subscribe, share this with a rugby mate, and leave a review with your biggest takeaway.
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What if the strongest teams aren’t built by hype, slogans, or “high performance” talk, but by a few clear rituals everyone can count on? I sit down with Dave Askew, deputy principal and First XV coach at Auckland Grammar School, to get a behind-the-scenes look at how one of New Zealand’s most storied schoolboy rugby programs builds culture that holds up under pressure.

We talk about the daily assembly as the “big hall” that creates belonging, recognition, and a shared start line for 2,000-plus boys. Dave explains why predictability and tradition matter, especially for students who don’t have stability at home, and how a consistent structure can unlock confidence and ambition. From there we get practical with “school rules plus one,” the idea that representing a premier team is a privilege and that leadership starts with doing the basics better than anyone else.

We also challenge the language that creeps into youth sport. Dave avoids the term “high performance” because of the pressure it puts on teenagers and the way it can scare off volunteer coaches. Instead, we explore “high care” as a better north star, along with a Plan A versus Plan B approach that keeps education and long-term career options at the center while still supporting big sporting dreams. If you coach school sports, lead a team, or care about building resilience and anti-fragility, you’ll take away tools you can use immediately.

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Rugby can fill a stadium. Culture can shape a life. We sit down with Sean Erasmus, head coach at Paul Boys High School, to unpack what it takes to build a values-led rugby program inside one of the most tradition-heavy environments in the world. His core idea is simple and demanding: culture is a living thing, and if we do not feed it and prune it every day, it drifts into something we never intended.

We get specific about what that looks like with schoolboys who face modern pressure that previous generations never had to carry: social media commentary, public hype, agents, contracts, and criticism that follows them home. Sean explains why banning phones is fantasy, how to talk about Instagram and TikTok head-on, and how to keep a teenager’s identity from swinging with every compliment or pile-on. He also makes the case for vulnerability in leadership: when we are willing to be real in front of the boys, they learn they can be real with us.

Then we zoom out to the system side of coaching culture and rugby leadership: how you scale consistent standards across dozens of teams, how you “coach the coaches,” and why you should match coaching styles to each age group’s needs. We also tackle the hardest stakeholder question in schoolboy rugby: parents. Sean shares a clear framework for respectful conversations, honest selection feedback, and boundaries that protect families on both sides.

If you care about team culture, schoolboy rugby, leadership, and developing young men in a high performance environment, this one will stay with you. Subscribe, share it with a coach or parent, and leave a review if it hits home. What’s one value you wish every coach would lead with?
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The Ranfurly Shield isn’t just a trophy. It’s a pressure cooker that turns every home match into a final, pulls entire towns into the story, and asks players to carry something heavier than a scoreboard. After Northland’s first Shield win since 1978, head coach Ryan Martin joins me to explain how his group handled the moment and why the celebration and the responsibility can actually fuel performance instead of distracting from it.

We dig into Ryan’s simple coaching framework for big games: confidence equals belief times evidence. Belief comes from the language you use and the “white noise” you remove when the week gets loud. Evidence comes from what you’ve trained long before the spotlight shows up, including the repeated reps that create quick skill retrieval when fatigue and nerves hit. Ryan shares how a single photo, two minutes of silence, and a few carefully chosen words can set a tone that speeches never reach.

From there we get practical: shock and awe without chaos. Ryan breaks down why two or three trained surprises like an unusual lineout setup or a bold tap move can rattle a structured defense, and how he stores ideas in a personal coaching library for the right opponent at the right time. We also talk training design, including the “cliff face” drill for earning momentum, and why pad holders must act like mini coaches if you want standards to rise across the whole squad.

Finally, we go deeper into coaching culture: leading with care, catching people doing something good, clipping heroic moments, and using haka and kaitiaki guardianship to build identity that lasts through media attention and mid-season celebrations. If you coach rugby, lead teams, or just love what sport can do for a community, you’ll take something usable from this conversation.

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If someone had to “explain” your culture to a new hire, would it fall apart the moment pressure hits? Ross Neal joins us to get brutally practical about what culture actually is: what you do and how you do it, so clear that a person could sit in your environment for a week and tell the truth about it. From pro rugby locker rooms to corporate leadership teams, Ross shows how culture is built in the small moments leaders leak through mood, reactions, and what they choose to reward.

We dig into the research-backed behaviors that separate high-performing teams from polite, underpowered ones. Ross breaks down information elaboration, the habit of asking sharper questions that clarifies intent and improves decisions, and why it often disappears in top-down, military-style environments. We also talk psychological safety as a facilitator, including simple “real world” tests you can run in one-to-ones to see if people truly feel safe enough to say, “I don’t understand.”

From there we get into coaching and management mechanics: how to use silence to pull thinking out of the room, why process over outcome matters most when things go well, and how a neutral review keeps standards consistent whether you win or lose. We also explore why structure often beats coaching, how onboarding accelerates “speed to excellence,” and what business and sport can steal from each other on recruitment, buy-in, and meeting design.

If you lead a team and want better decisions, more ownership, and a culture people can feel, press play then share this with a colleague. Subscribe, leave a review, and tell us: what’s one small change you could make this week that would get your team asking better questions?
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How to be a great coach Book Vol 2 is out on Amazon now
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