Coming Clean With Me

Harry Beattie spent over a decade in Narcotics Anonymous while repeatedly relapsing. In this episode of Coming Clean With Me, he shares what finally changed when his sobriety began to stabilise — not through a new programme, but through major life shifts including fatherhood, daily structure, public accountability, and cold-water exposure. He reflects on why previous recovery attempts failed and what made the difference this time.

In conversation with cocaine addiction expert Elliott Wald, Harry opens up about his history of cocaine use, repeated relapse, and the emotional roots of addiction. He discusses growing up in an emotionally distant home, living with undiagnosed ADHD, and using cocaine to quiet his mind rather than energise it — until it led to paranoia, disrupted sleep, and deteriorating mental health.

Harry explains how responsibility, habit, and routine became key to lasting sobriety. He maintains a focus on discipline, structure, and daily consistency rather than thinking in terms of being “cured.”

00:00 – Cocaine addiction recovery: From chaos to Ice Bath Harry
00:34 – Childhood abandonment and emotional neglect
00:42 – Privilege without nurture: hidden trauma
01:11 – 409 days clean: why sobriety finally stuck
01:30 – Full introduction: Ice Bath Harry’s story
03:14 – Growing up wealthy but emotionally deprived
04:13 – ADHD, school expulsions, and being labelled “naughty”
06:40 – Seeking validation, rebellion, and risk-taking
09:20 – Impulsivity, danger, and early addiction traits
10:19 – Undiagnosed ADHD and addiction vulnerability
12:35 – “I’m not cured”: understanding long-term recovery
12:49 – Video game addiction and escapism
13:49 – Alcohol, early substance use, and rebellion
15:36 – First cocaine use and immediate emotional relief
16:45 – Why cocaine felt calming, not stimulating
18:10 – ADHD, dopamine deficiency, and cocaine
21:43 – How cocaine addiction escalates
23:04 – Sales culture, money, and daily cocaine use
24:07 – When cocaine stops working
26:26 – Addiction, anxiety, and loss of control
28:30 – Isolation, paranoia, and binge use
30:00 – Dry sniffing and hiding cocaine addiction
31:09 – Why traditional recovery failed
33:56 – Losing family, home, and identity
36:00 – Staying awake for days on cocaine
38:30 – Cocaine-induced paranoia and psychosis
42:10 – “This isn’t what cocaine promised”
44:20 – Rock bottom and emotional collapse
46:55 – Rehab, relapse, and reality
49:05 – Visualising recovery and future identity
51:22 – Is addiction a disease?
55:00 – Why one-size-fits-all recovery doesn’t work
59:57 – Alcohol vs cocaine: brain differences
01:08:11 – Why stimulant addiction needs a different approach
01:24:26 – Ice baths, dopamine, and recovery
01:26:00 – Public accountability and staying clean
01:28:30 – Building Ice Bath Harry online
01:31:40 – Identity, shame, and self-belief
01:32:30 – What addiction really is
01:34:00 – Fatherhood, meaning, and closing message

Elliott Wald is a British psychologist, hypnosis expert, and behavioural analyst with over 30 years of clinical experience. He specialises exclusively in the treatment of cocaine addiction via nasal use (snorting) — a form of stimulant addiction that is frequently misunderstood and poorly treated by generic recovery models.

Alongside his formal clinical training, Elliott also brings direct lived experience. He maintained a daily cocaine addiction for 15 years, when he was publicly visible and appearing as an expert on national television. This combination of clinical expertise and first-hand experience allows Elliott to understand stimulant addiction from both a neuropsychological and human perspective — without ideology, moral judgement, or
Find out more on Elliott's website:
https://www.hypnosis-expert.com/ADDICTION/

In this compelling episode of "Coming Clean With Me," Caught in a Trap, “host Elliott Wald engages in a deeply personal conversation with Lorri Haines, a multimillionaire entrepreneur and reality TV star known for his role in the ITV show ‘My Family and Me’. Despite his current success, Lorri's journey is one marked by significant challenges and personal growth.
Episode Highlights
A Troubled Past: Lorri opens up about his tumultuous upbringing on a council estate in Portsmouth, where he was raised by an alcoholic mother. He shares vivid memories of growing up amid abuse and neglect, which set the stage for his own struggles with addiction.
Early Exposure to Substance Abuse: From a young age, Lorri was surrounded by substance use, starting with alcohol at around 13 or 14. He describes how alcohol served as a gateway to other substances like cannabis and eventually cocaine, particularly during his teenage years.
The Cycle of Addiction: Despite achieving financial success and public recognition, Lorri candidly discusses how wealth and fame exacerbated his substance use. He reflects on the party lifestyle that came with his success, which only deepened his struggles with addiction.
 Breaking Free: Lorri recounts the pivotal moments that led him to recognize the need for change. A friend's father played a crucial role in helping him break free from the cycle of addiction by offering him work and guidance, ultimately steering him toward a more stable path.
A New Perspective on Success: Today, Lorri measures success not by material wealth but by emotional well-being and the ability to maintain healthy relationships. He emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and emotional stability as key components of his recovery journey.
 This episode offers listeners an intimate look into Lorri Haines' life, highlighting the complexities of addiction and the resilience required to overcome it. Through his story, Lorri provides hope and inspiration to others facing similar battles, demonstrating that it is possible to break free from the traps of addiction and build a fulfilling life.
Find out more on Elliott's website:
https://www.hypnosis-expert.com/ADDICTION/

In this riveting episode of "Coming Clean with Me," addiction specialist Elliott Wald sits down with the multifaceted Savannah Simms, a rising star in the music industry known for her roles as an events manager, artist developer, and DJ. But beneath the vibrant beats and pulsating rhythms lies a story of struggle and redemption. Savannah candidly shares her tumultuous journey through addiction, recounting how alcohol and drugs once gripped her life, threatening to derail her burgeoning career.
Listeners are taken on a rollercoaster ride as Savannah opens up about her early years in Southeast London, where experimentation with substances began at a young age. She describes the allure of the nightlife and the deceptive comfort found in substances that masked deeper issues. From the chaotic highs of running massive raves to the solitary lows in her room, Savannah's story is one of both caution and hope.
Now 96 days sober, Savannah reflects on the turning points that led her to seek sobriety and the challenges she faces in an industry where temptation is ever-present. Her narrative is not just about overcoming addiction but also about reclaiming her identity and passion for music without the crutch of substances.
Find out more on Elliott's website:
https://www.hypnosis-expert.com/ADDICTION/

Matthew Hopkins, recovery warrior. Matthew's raw and unfiltered story takes listeners on a rollercoaster ride through his tumultuous past, from his rebellious childhood in Felixstowe to his shattered dreams of an army career.
With unflinching honesty, Matthew opens up about his descent into a world of steroids, brawls, and drug addiction. He recounts harrowing tales of paranoia, prison stints, and the toll his choices took on his loved ones. But this isn't just another cautionary tale - it's a powerful testament to the human spirit's resilience. 
Matthew doesn't hold back as he describes his rock bottom moments, including a failed drug test that cost him a job in America. He shares the wake-up calls that finally pushed him to seek help and the challenges of early recovery.
Now eight months clean, Matthew offers a candid look at his ongoing journey to rebuild his life and relationships. This episode is a must-listen for anyone struggling with addiction or those seeking to understand its grip. Elliott and Matthew's conversation is both heartbreaking and inspiring, proving that it's never too late to change your path and find strength in vulnerability.
Buckle up for an intense, no-holds-barred discussion about the dark reality of addiction and the bright possibility of redemption. Matthew Hopkins' story will stay with you long after the episode ends.
Find out more on Elliott's website:
https://www.hypnosis-expert.com/ADDICTION/

In this raw and gritty episode of "Coming Clean with Me," addiction specialist Elliott Wald sits down with DJ Mak 10, a.k.a. Nathaniel Ramsey, one of the founding fathers of the UK grime scene. Like the hard-hitting beats and unfiltered lyrics that define grime music, Mak 10 lays bare his 23-year battle with addiction, pulling no punches as he recounts his journey from the grimy streets of East London to the dizzying heights of fame.
As a key player in the influential Nasty Crew, Mak 10 helped shape the sound that would become the voice of a generation. But behind the decks and the bravado, a darker story was unfolding. With the same intensity that drove his music, Mak 10 found himself caught in a spiral of cocaine, alcohol, and destructive behaviour that threatened to silence his career and his life.
From the adrenaline-fueled highs of all-night benders to the crushing lows of paranoia and self-loathing, Mak 10 spits his truth with the same rapid-fire delivery that made him a legend. He doesn't shy away from the dirt, detailing the funky chicken episodes, the dishonest hustles, and the relationships shattered in the wake of his addiction.
But like the best grime tracks, this story has a powerful drop. Mak 10 reveals the moment that finally cut through the noise, leading him to seek help and begin the gruelling process of getting clean. Now ten months sober, he offers a glimpse of life on the other side - a redemption as powerful as any beat he's ever dropped.
This episode is a must-listen for anyone who's ever felt trapped by their demons or struggled to find their way back from the brink. It's a testament to the resilience of the human spirit and a reminder that even in the grittiest of circumstances, there's always hope for a comeback.
Find out more on Elliott's website:
https://www.hypnosis-expert.com/ADDICTION/