The Baffling Behavior Show {Parenting after Trauma}

We've been in a three-part series on sticky behaviors (behaviors that don’t seem to change, no matter WHAT you do!), and today we're doing the detective work: what is your specific child's nervous system actually predicting? 
In This Episode
Three detective questions to help you identify what prediction might be driving your child's stickiest behaviors, and what those behaviors are actually protecting against
Why you don't have to get the detective work exactly right, because the mismatched experience that changes the brain is almost always the same thing no matter what prediction is running
How your working theory about your child's nervous system changes something in you first, and why this is so important (but also, no pressure. We’re all doing the best we can)

Resources Mentioned
Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors — robyngobbel.com/bafflingbook
The Club — robyngobbel.com/theclub
Immersion Program for Professionals — robyngobbel.com/immersion
Part 1 of this series: Why Sticky Behaviors Stay Stuck 
Part 2 of this series: What Actually Changes Sticky Behaviors

Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/predicting
Presence in Practice: An Experiential Workshop into the Neurobiology of How Change Happens
RobynGobbel.com/MIPIP26
Early Bird rate expires June 15!
:::
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

Part 1 was about why sticky behaviors stay stuck. Part 2 is where the hope lives. We're diving into the two mechanisms that actually change sticky behaviors at the neurological level. This is the episode that makes the hardest ask of Part - shifting away from ‘fix-it’ and ‘this has to change’ energy- make sense.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why your child's dysregulation isn't the obstacle to healing; it's actually the doorway to it
The two mechanisms that change sticky behaviors at the neurological level, why one creates the conditions for the other, and why neither of them will look like anything is working for a long time
What it actually means to stay regulated during your child's hardest moments 
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/changesticky
Presence in Practice: An Experiential Workshop into the Neurobiology of How Change Happens
RobynGobbel.com/MIPIP26
Early Bird rate expires June 15!
:::
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

If you've tried everything and a behavior just won't stop…that's a sticky behavior. Let's dive deeeeeep into the neuroscience behind the behaviors that feel impossible to change. We'll touch on how the brain stores predictions and how the most well-meaning response can actually, unintentionally, keep those predictions locked in place and perpetuate that sticky behavior. This is Part 1 of a 3-part series that brings new aha moments to your child's most baffling behaviors.
In this episode, you will learn:
Why your child's brain holds onto certain behaviors so tightly, and why it has nothing to do with defiance or choice
What neural glue is and why the behaviors encoded under overwhelm and aloneness are the stickiest of all
Why the urge to make a behavior stop can actually confirm the very prediction the behavior is protecting
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
https://robyngobbel.com/immersion/
Read the full transcript at:RobynGobbel.com/stickybehaviors1
Presence in Practice: An Experiential Workshop into the Neurobiology of How Change Happens
RobynGobbel.com/MIPIP26
Early Bird rate expires June 15!
:::
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

When kids can't tolerate boredom, it's easy to forget to put on our X-ray vision goggles and chalk it up to too much screen time or even not enough gratitude. Our kids’ reaction to boredom triggers OUR watchdog brain! If we can invite our owl to come back, we will almost certainly see that boredom flips our kids’ nervous system into protection mode.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why boredom can trigger the nervous system to shift onto the protection pathway
How vulnerability in the nervous system (whether from ADHD, autism, trauma, or any other reason a kid has a vulnerable nervous system) impacts a child's experience of boredom 
Practical, nervous-system-informed ways to gradually build your child's boredom tolerance 
Read the full transcript at: RobynGobbel.com/boredom
Presence in Practice: An Experiential Workshop into the Neurobiology of How Change Happens
RobynGobbel.com/MIPIP26
Early Bird rate expires June 15!
:::
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)

A dad - who is also a former foster youth and the director of non-profit supporting foster and adoptive families - shares an honest and tender conversation about what it's actually like to parent kids with big, baffling behaviors when life is also impossibly hard. He shares the staggering losses his family has carried over the past few years, how he found The Baffling Behavior Show, Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors, and The Club…and what has genuinely helped him keep going. This one is for every parent who has felt utterly alone in this journey- AND for every professional who needs a reminder of what the real work actually is.
In this episode you'll learn:
Why being seen by people who truly get it matters more than any tool or strategy
How learning to receive and offer presence (not just advice) changes the way you show up everywhere- with your kids, at work, and even in a Whataburger drive-through
What it looks like to hold hope and honesty at the same time- staying grounded in how hard things really are without sliding into toxic positivity or despair
Presence in Practice: An Experiential Workshop into the Neurobiology of How Change Happens
RobynGobbel.com/MIPIP26
Early Bird rate expires June 15!
:::
Immersion Program for Professionals!
The Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals is NOW accepting applications for our 2027 cohorts. You MUST be on the waiting list to be eligible to apply so head to RobynGobbel.com/Immersion and put your name on the waiting list!
Grab a copy of USA Today Best Selling book Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors robyngobbel.com/book
Join us in The Club for more support! robyngobbel.com/TheClub
Sign up on the waiting list for the 2027 Cohorts of the Baffling Behavior Training Institute's Immersion Program for Professionals robyngobbel.com/Immersion
Follow Me On:
Facebook
Instagram
Over on my website you can find:
Webinar and eBook on Focus on the Nervous System to Change Behavior (FREE)
eBook on The Brilliance of Attachment (FREE)
LOTS & LOTS of FREE Resources
Ongoing support, connection, and co-regulation for struggling parents: The Club
Year-Long Immersive & Holistic Training Program for Parenting Professionals: The Baffling Behavior Training Institute’s (BBTI) Professional Immersion Program (formerly Being With)