The Deep Coach

What happens when you do everything “right”… and still feel empty?

In this episode of The Deep Coach Podcast, I sit down with Patrick Boland—executive coach, author of The Contemplative Leader, and former high-achiever who hit a breaking point early in life.

At just 16, Patrick experienced a profound existential crisis. Despite excelling in academics, sports, and music, he found himself asking a deeper question:

“What is it all for?”

What followed was a journey through depression, spirituality, mentorship, and ultimately, a radical shift in how he relates to success, meaning, and leadership.

📝 Key Themes

The illusion of success as a path to fulfillment

Existential crisis as a gateway to transformation

Mentorship and inner healing

Letting go of control and walking the “pathless path”

Navigating uncertainty and liminal space

Contemplative leadership in a changing world

Fatherhood, legacy, and meaning

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⏰ Timestamps

01:44 Teen Pressure and Emptiness

03:17 Loss Sparks the Spiral

04:49 Ecclesiastes Awakening

06:23 Rejecting the Scripted Life

08:32 Prayer and Inner Shift

09:51 Mentors and the Enneagram

14:45 Why Mentorship Matters

18:31 Pilot Dream Shattered

21:37 Sailing and Letting Go

25:51 Richard Rohr Connection

29:15 Credentials and Calling

32:40 Lifes Work Quote

33:17 Walking the Pathless Path

35:15 Listening Beneath Fear

36:56 Culture and Consciousness Stages

41:59 Contemplative Leadership Explained

52:39 Fatherhood and Facing the Future

57:54 Doing Whats Yours to Do

01:02:19 Go Through the Storm

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🔗 Connect with Patrick Boland

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-boland-9546048/

Website: https://www.conexus.ie/

Book: https://www.thecontemplativeleader.com/

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 📖 Resources Mentioned

The Contemplative Leader – Patrick Boland

Everything Belongs – Richard Rohr

Ecclesiastes (Hebrew scriptures)

Learn More About Our Work at the Center:
Website: https://www.centerfortransformationalcoaching.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thedeepcoach
Instagram: https://instagram.com/thedeepcoach
➡️ Download our Free Guide: "How to Make a Living as a Transformational Coach"
💡 Please subscribe to get updates on the latest episodes. Thank you for listening!

Many people believe success will bring fulfillment — the career, the money, the family, the recognition. For Chris Kalbfleisch, he achieved all of it.

And then… everything collapsed.

In just 11 months, Chris went from a high-performing hedge fund executive with a thriving life to sitting in a jail cell, facing prison time. In this deeply moving conversation, Chris shares:

The hidden pain beneath achievement

His descent into addiction and self-sabotage

The moment everything broke — and everything began

How surrender, spirituality, and deep inner work transformed his life

What it really means to find peace

This is a story about awakening — not as a concept, but as a lived experience.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, lost, or quietly disconnected despite external success… this conversation is for you.

Below, you’ll find key moments from the episode to guide your listening:

⏰ Timestamps

02:23 – Conditioned Success Mindset

03:20 – Childhood Shame and Alcoholism

07:30 – Achievement as Escape

09:15 – Misdiagnosis and Proving Worth

11:35 – Alcohol Creeps In

13:40 – Finance Career and Outer Success

15:40 – Inner Collapse and Self-Sabotage

22:30 – 2019 Spiral to Jail

27:12 – Facing the Judge Unafraid

29:21 – AA, Surrender, and Spiritual Signs

36:03 – First Kundalini Experience

36:58 – The Teacher Training Leap

37:49 – Aquarian Sadhana Practice

39:55 – Two Paths, One Recovery

41:18 – Court Sentence as Transformation

44:55 – Amends and Family Distance

48:05 – Healing the Mother Wound

51:40 – Meeting Jacqueline Again

54:38 – Stepfamily and Being Seen

56:22 – Sharing His Story with Teens

01:00:58 – Ego Traps in a New Career

01:06:18 – Final Reflections on Surrender

🔗 Connect With Chris

🌐 Website

📘 Facebook

💼 LinkedIn

Learn More About Our Work at the Center:
Website: https://www.centerfortransformationalcoaching.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thedeepcoach
Instagram: https://instagram.com/thedeepcoach
➡️ Download our Free Guide: "How to Make a Living as a Transformational Coach"
💡 Please subscribe to get updates on the latest episodes. Thank you for listening!

Many people believe that if they can just find the right plan, the right strategy, or the right path… life will finally feel stable, clear, and under control. 

But for Phyllis Lane, life unfolded in a very different way. 

After the unraveling of a long-term relationship, the collapse of a shared business, and the loss of many of the structures she once relied on, Phyllis found herself with nothing to hold onto—no clear direction, no plan, and no guarantees. 

What emerged wasn’t a new strategy. It was a deeper way of living. 

In this conversation, Phyllis shares how she learned to move beyond the thinking mind and into a life guided by intuition, presence, and trust. Through creativity, movement, and deep inner listening, she discovered what it means to live the “pathless path”—where life is no longer something you control, but something you allow to move through you. 

Together, Jonathan and Phyllis explore what it truly means to let go of control, trust the unknown, and follow the aliveness of life itself. 

What we explore in this episode… 

01:51 Reunion and the beginning of an unraveling 

03:26 Growing up in a turbulent environment and developing sensitivity 

04:57 Martial arts as the first doorway into intuition 

05:39 The modeling world and a wake-up call around identity 

06:48 Leaving New York and moving to the desert in search of something deeper 

07:49 Art as the turning point back into the inner world 

09:33 Movement, creativity, and releasing stored emotional energy 

12:17 Trusting the flow and becoming a channel for life 

18:54 Lessons from business, partnership, and pressure 

24:21 Inner child healing and learning not to abandon yourself 

31:34 When life tests your peace 

32:36 “Going home” as a spiritual practice 

34:38 Meeting fear at the edge of the unknown 

35:44 Intuition as a daily devotion 

40:20 Trusting creative work and the flow of income 

50:23 Her book Living the Flow and the final invitation to leap 

___________________________ 

🔗 Connect with Phyllis 

🌐 Website: www.phyllislane.com 

📸 Instagram: @phyllislane 

 

Learn More About Our Work at the Center:
Website: https://www.centerfortransformationalcoaching.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thedeepcoach
Instagram: https://instagram.com/thedeepcoach
➡️ Download our Free Guide: "How to Make a Living as a Transformational Coach"
💡 Please subscribe to get updates on the latest episodes. Thank you for listening!

What happens after a spiritual awakening?

Many people imagine awakening as the end of the journey — a permanent state of clarity, wisdom, and freedom. But for Steven Lane, a spontaneous awakening in his mid-twenties was only the beginning.

In this conversation, Steven shares the surprising reality that followed his awakening experience. Despite profound insights into the nature of reality, he discovered that old patterns, conditioning, and human limitations didn’t simply disappear.

Wanting to understand what had opened within him, Steven spent seven years as a Buddhist monk before eventually returning to the world — building a family, studying psychotherapy and coaching, and developing an integrative approach to transformational work.

 

In this episode, Jonathan Hermida and Steven explore the deeper arc of transformation: awakening, integration, and the ongoing work of becoming fully human.

What we explore in this episode... 

02:19 Before The Shift

02:38 Early Inner Calling

05:06 Rebel Years In Germany

08:13 Meditation Meets Hedonism

12:02 Psychic Warning Signs

15:59 Remove The Veil

19:39 Dreamlike Awakening Night

22:36 Integration And Aftermath

31:50 Monk Life And Tantra Drive

38:03 Cult Red Flags And Spain

41:48 Tara Wisdom And Healing

45:12 Leaving Robes And Marriage

46:29 Spiritual Bypassing Breakdown

47:32 Freedom and New Search

50:15 Angels and Healing Session

55:35 Dzogchen Homecoming

01:05:05 Koans and Cardiac Wakeup

01:15:04 Integration and Final Advice

🔗 Connect with Steven

Website: www.transformationalcoaching.ie

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/stevenlanecoach/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/steven-lane-transformationalcoach/

Learn More About Our Work at the Center:
Website: https://www.centerfortransformationalcoaching.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thedeepcoach
Instagram: https://instagram.com/thedeepcoach
➡️ Download our Free Guide: "How to Make a Living as a Transformational Coach"
💡 Please subscribe to get updates on the latest episodes. Thank you for listening!

What happens when you lose everything and move into your car just to keep your dream alive? Lorenz Sell, founder of Sutra, shares his extraordinary journey from living in his car and declaring bankruptcy to building a platform designed to cultivate collective intelligence at scale. 

What we explore in this episode... 

02:00 Before The Awakening 

07:17 A Citizen Of Earth 

10:57 Why Burning Man Feels Home 

20:18 2011 Peace Awakening 

29:12 New York Breakthrough 

39:50 All In for New York 

40:35 Love and Co-Founding 

46:34 Heartbeat Collapse and Rebuild 

50:20 Coding Sutra and Lean Iteration 

56:16 Mission Devotion and Sutra Explained 

01:08:12 Connection Lessons and Closing Poem

🔗 Learn more about Lorenz and Sutra:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lorenzsell/ 

Sutra: https://web.sutra.co/

 

Learn More About Our Work at the Center:
Website: https://www.centerfortransformationalcoaching.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thedeepcoach
Instagram: https://instagram.com/thedeepcoach
➡️ Download our Free Guide: "How to Make a Living as a Transformational Coach"
💡 Please subscribe to get updates on the latest episodes. Thank you for listening!