The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast

This week's episode is an encore episode. I'm away at my Unbreakable Retreat, so I'm revisiting one that felt right to bring back.
I asked a friend who is going through a divorce what I should talk about on this episode. He said I should talk about cravings. He explained it this way, "Given the shit happening in the world, we turn to safety, fantasy, and imagination to numb our true selves and we give up the authentic fight." How beautiful is that?
There is so much happening in the world right now.
And my friend is right, we numb out as a way to escape. We numb with food, drinking, or shopping. When it comes to relationships, we numb out by fantasizing about other people, hoping they are the cure for a troubled marriage. Turning to other people, places, or things will not lead you to true fulfillment. Doing so simply covers up the pain, momentarily.
Succumbing to cravings is giving up the authentic fight.
What happens if you just sit still with all of the shit that is happening in your life? What if you gazed into all of your own holes and examined them for what they are? What if?
What might be possible for your relationship, for your marriage, or most importantly, for you? That's what this episode is about. I hope you tune in.
What You'll Hear About In This Episode:
Why a marriage is not responsible for fulfilling you 100%
Discernment work is so complex, but necessary
The importance of recognizing your own 'made-up' stories and changing the narrative
Links and Resources:

Unbreakable Retreat
Kate Anthony's Complete Parenting Plan 
Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate 
The Divorce Strategy Toolkit
Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective
Kate on Instagram
Kate on Facebook
Kate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch
Episodes are also available YouTube!
Seven Step Mindset Reset for Divorce
Disclaimer:
The commentary and opinions available on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and not for the purpose of providing legal or psychological advice. You should contact an attorney, coach, or therapist in your state to obtain advice with respect to any particular issue or problem.

After divorce, medical decisions don't stop. Kids still need vaccines, dental appointments, medications, evaluations, therapy, all of it. In high-conflict or parallel parenting, even basic healthcare decisions can become a new arena for control, misinformation, and sabotage. To help navigate this, I'm talking with board-certified pediatrician Dr. Madeline Gagnon, a complex care specialist who has worked with families at Boston Children's Hospital and other leading institutions.
We get into how kids get pulled into adult conflict without realizing it, what healthy conflict actually looks like between co-parents, and what child-centered medical decision-making means when parents don't agree. We also tackle a question that comes up constantly: if you're going to keep fighting these battles anyway, shouldn't you just stay in the marriage? It's a conversation about knowing what's worth going to bat for, what isn't, and how to keep your kids at the center.
What you'll hear about in this episode:
What child-centered medical decision-making looks like when you and your co-parent don't agree (3:49)

How triangulation shows up in divorced families, often more subtly than you'd expect, and how kids get pulled into it without even realizing what's happening (17:44)

Whether staying together just to keep the peace and avoid future battles is really the safer choice for your kids (28:23)

Wisdom for the mom who feels like she's fighting an uphill battle just to get her kid the care they need (44:13)

What healthy conflict actually looks like between exes, and how to move toward it instead of away from it (46:54)

Learn more about Dr. Madeleine Gagnon:
Dr. Madeleine Gagnon is a board-certified pediatrician, qualified neutral mediator, and advocate for family communication and conflict resolution. A graduate of Georgetown University School of Medicine, she has worked for leading institutions including Boston Children's Hospital.
She is the founder of BRIDGE Health Consulting, which helps families navigate conflict, grief, trauma, and life transitions; PULSE, a social initiative for teens and their parents that promotes communication and confidence through mentorship and social media; and BRIDGE To Home, which provides in-home support services for individuals with disabilities and mental health needs.
Through years of work spanning both the clinic and community, Dr. Gagnon delivers practical, real-world approaches to everyday challenges that resonate meaningfully with parents, children, and teens alike.
A trusted voice on parenting, adolescence, and family dynamics, Dr. Gagnon is frequently featured as a medical expert on network television and public radio affiliates.
Resources & Links:
Kate Anthony's Complete Parenting Plan 

Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate 

The Divorce Strategy Toolkit

Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective

Kate on Instagram

Kate on Facebook

Kate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch

Episodes are also available YouTube!

Seven Step Mindset Reset for Divorce 

Listeners can exclusively book a free 15–20 minute Parent Strategy Call with Dr. Gagnon

Dr. Gagnon's website

Dr. Gagnon on Instagram (Resources for Parents)

Dr. Gagnon on Instagram (Resources for Teens)

Dr. Gagnon on Instagram

Dr. Gagnon on Facebook

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DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.
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Encore Episode!!
After over a decade of working with thousands of women, I've become really good at mapping out the entire divorce process and pinpointing where on that map someone might land. I've become so good at it that I actually created something I'm calling The Divorce Roadmap.
In this episode, I share the three stages of the Roadmap: Awareness, Action, and Moving On, and explore the various phases within each stage. Divorce journeys are almost never linear, they ebb and flow and have hard times and times when things fall neatly into place. Knowing where you are on your journey can help you prepare for what's to come. If, after listening to this episode, you have found yourself somewhere along the map described, I have resources for every phase and every stage. You can download your divorce roadmap after listening to this episode. 


What you'll hear about in this episode:


The three stages of the Divorce Roadmap: Awareness, Action, and Moving On
Awareness stage: questioning, dawning realization, begging and bargaining, and finally acceptance
Action stage: having the talk, making big decisions, telling the kids, and more
Moving On stage: co-parenting, dating, single by choice, a first relationship, a first heartbreak, and possibly family blending
Why the journey rarely moves in a straight line, and how stages like anger and grief, or questioning and backsliding, tend to loop back on each other


Resources & Links:


Your Divorce Roadmap
Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate
The Divorce Survival Guide Resource Bundle

Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective

Kate on Instagram

Kate on Facebook

Kate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast Episodes are also available YouTube!
Seven Step Mindset Reset 



Disclaimer


The commentary and opinions available on this podcast are for informational and entertainment purposes only and not for the purpose of providing legal or psychological advice. You should contact an attorney, coach, or therapist in your state to obtain advice with respect to any particular issue or problem.

Laurie James, somatic practitioner, coach, and author of Sandwiched, returns to talk about the rise of misogyny and what it means for women inside their relationships, their families, and the broader culture. This is a conversation we've both been having for years—in our own lives and with the women we work with every day—and it felt like time to have it out loud, together.
Throughout our conversation, we unpack what misogyny actually is, how it shows up in ways women are often taught to minimize or normalize, and what living with it does to the body and nervous system over time. We also talk about what happens when the overwhelm becomes so intense that even identifying the next step—let alone making a plan—feels impossible.
And we get into the question of when survival is no longer enough. When is it time to stop simply getting through the day and begin pushing back, speaking up, or making a change? That timing is deeply personal, and it matters more than people often realize.
We're not having this conversation to frighten women or tell them what they should do. We're having it so they can better understand what they're experiencing, trust what their bodies have been telling them, and begin finding their way toward safety.
What you'll hear about in this episode:
What misogyny actually means and how it can show up inside a relationship (7:34)

The physical toll of living under chronic stress, including the possible connection to autoimmune disease (13:36)

Practical ways to regulate your nervous system when you're too overwhelmed to think clearly, much less make a plan (18:53)

What current data reveals about the rise of misogyny in the United States over the past several years (25:35)

Why healing may need to come before advocacy (36:03)

How to approach dating with less fear in a cultural climate that can make it feel increasingly unsafe (38:42)

Learn more about Laurie James:
Laurie James is a mother, divorcée, recovering caregiver turned author, certified somatic practitioner & coach, and podcaster. With over 15 years' experience in energy work, somatic healing, parts work, and coaching. Laurie's podcast, Confessions of a Freebird, was inspired by her youngest of four children leaving the nest and is the sequel to her book, Sandwiched: A Memoir of Holding On and Letting Go.
Laurie's book is about her journey from loneliness to finding belonging during a time when she was raising four teenage daughters, her mother had a heart attack and needed care, all while her marriage began to crumble.
Now Laurie helps people divorce, heal, and date differently in midlife. She blends her coaching, somatic experiencing, and internal family systems training to help improve her clients relationships through befriending their body, nervous system, and parts that are protecting them. Doing so allows them to find the inner freedom to experience more happiness, joy, and create the life they desire.
When she is not coaching clients or podcasting, she can be found nurturing her free spirit by walking her dog, skiing, sailing, hiking, volunteering, spending time with close friends or planning her next adventure.
Resources & Links:
Kate Anthony's Complete Parenting Plan
Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate
The Divorce Strategy Toolkit

Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective

Kate on Instagram

Kate on Facebook

Kate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch

Episodes are also available YouTube!
Seven Step Mindset Reset for Divorce

Laurie's website
Laurie on Instagram
Laurie on Facebook
Laurie on LinkedIn

Episode 95: Toxic Abuser-in-Chief: What Politics Has to Do With Your Marriage
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DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.
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What if self-care never quite fixed things because it was never designed to?
There's a particular kind of exhaustion that comes from trying to create peace inside a relationship that keeps taking it away from you. You buy the lavender spray. You take the baths. You book the massages. You go to therapy. Some of it helps for an hour, an evening, maybe even a weekend.
Then he walks through the door, and your body tenses right back up.
In this solo episode, I talk about why self-care may have helped you survive your marriage without ever making it feel safe. Self-care can ease stress, but it cannot cure coercive control, make emotional abuse less abusive, or turn chronic criticism into intimacy.
A massage might release the tension in your shoulders. It cannot make a deceptive or volatile partner trustworthy. The larger system remains fully intact while you play Whac-A-Mole with the symptoms, trying to create a sense of peace that the relationship keeps disrupting.
I also talk about what happens in your body when you get real distance from that system, whether it's a work trip, a weekend away, or moving out for good. Sometimes the most revealing part is the profound peace that shows up when you are no longer being asked to monitor another adult all day long.
What you'll hear about in this episode:
Why self-care so often helps you survive a harmful marriage without ever making it safe

The joy and calmness of finding profound peace 

Why some self-care genuinely helps you find the strength to climb out, even as it can quietly extend your tolerance for the intolerable

The difference between coping better with a harmful dynamic and that dynamic actually improving

How grief and calm can coexist after separation

The deeper questions worth sitting with, like what becomes possible once you're no longer immersed in toxicity every single day

Resources & Links:
Phoenix Rising: A Divorce Empowerment Collective


Focused Strategy Sessions with Kate

The Divorce Strategy Toolkit


Kate Anthony's Complete Parenting Plan

The D Word: Making the Ultimate Decision About Your Marriage


Seven Step Mindset Reset for Divorce 


Kate on Instagram


Kate on Facebook


Kate's Substack Newsletter: Divorce Coaching Dispatch


Episodes are also available YouTube!

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DISCLAIMER:  THE COMMENTARY AND OPINIONS AVAILABLE ON THIS PODCAST ARE FOR INFORMATIONAL AND ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND NOT FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROVIDING LEGAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL ADVICE.  YOU SHOULD CONTACT AN ATTORNEY, COACH, OR THERAPIST IN YOUR STATE TO OBTAIN ADVICE WITH RESPECT TO ANY PARTICULAR ISSUE OR PROBLEM.
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