Mother Mayhem: For Daughters of Narcissistic or Emotionally Limited Mothers

• The No Contact Conversation: What Happened to "What Happened to You?"

  This is a conversation I didn't expect to be having.We’re in the middle of a series on navigating aging narcissistic and emotionally limited mothers, and I wasn’t planning to step away from that. But after Oprah’s recent episode on estrangement and no contact, I watched too many daughters get shaken in places they’ve worked so hard to steady. Between the social media clips, the framing of the conversation, and several deeply unhelpful moments in the episode itself, I could feel the collective wobble  of this community.This conversation wouldn’t leave me alone. And when daughters are questioning themselves because a public voice got the story wrong, I’m not going to stay quiet.Today’s episode is a grounded, trauma-informed unpacking of:Why Oprah’s conversation landed like a gut punch for so many daughtersThe specific moments that caused harm (and why they mattered)How trauma brain recognized misattunement before your mind didWhy skepticism toward estrangement hits daughters differently than it hits anyone elseWhat the episode missed about the reality of no contactWhy your decision is still valid, still grounded, and still yoursThis is not an episode about blame.It’s an episode about clarity and returning you to your truth.If you felt confused, guilty, defensive, ashamed, or suddenly unsure after watching Oprah’s episode, you are not alone and you are not imagining anything. Your body recognized a familiar dismissal long before you found the language for it.This conversation is here to help you name what happened, settle your system, and reconnect to the truth you’ve built.We’ll return to the aging-mother series next week, but today is for you.And if you need to keep talking about it, join us in conversation over at MayhemDaughters.com to join group or our online community.

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• 119. When Mom Gets Old but Never Changes: Boundaries, Guilt, and Caregiving Decisions

  In this episode, we’re talking about one of the hardest realities daughters face when their mothers age. Your mom may be getting older, more fragile, or more dependent, but the patterns you grew up with haven’t changed. So how are you supposed to make decisions about caregiving, contact, or end of life when the relationship has always been complicated and often painful?Today I’m answering the questions daughters ask the most in this season. Questions about guilt, boundaries, responsibility, and what “enough” looks like when you’re caring for someone who never truly cared for you.We explore how to make decisions with clarity instead of fear, how to set limits that protect your well being, and how to support without losing yourself. We also talk about the emotional whiplash that comes with this role. Grief, anger, obligation, exhaustion, and tenderness can all show up at the same time.If your mother is aging and you are the one being asked to manage, respond, coordinate, or carry the emotional weight, this episode is meant to steady you. You are allowed to make decisions based on your capacity, not your conditioning. You are allowed to protect your peace. And you are allowed to define enough in a way that keeps you whole.If you’re a daughter navigating this, you don’t have to do it alone. Join us inside the Mayhem Daughters community, where we talk openly about trauma brain, boundaries, nervous system healing, and how to rebuild a life that actually feels like yours. Members who join now keep their rate when prices go up in 2026.

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• 118. The Aging Narcissistic Mother: Daughters’ Decisions and Boundaries in Caregiving [Revisited]

  This week, we're starting a short series on one of the hardest chapters daughters face: what happens when the mother who never cared for you starts needing care herself.This isn’t just about your aging narcissistic moms. It’s about identity, boundaries, guilt, and the stories you tell yourselves about what it means to be a good daughter. Even if your mother isn’t aging yet, or if you’ve already walked through this, you’ll hear yourself somewhere in these conversations. They’re really about what happens when love and obligation collide.You don't have to manage this alone. Connect with other daughters who are in it with you. Learn more at MayhemDaughters.com

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• A Free Mayhem Gathering for a Season That Feels Like A Lot

  This season is a lot for daughters... the pressure, the memories, the emotional muscle memory that shows up whether you celebrate the holidays or not. I’ve been hearing from so many of you about what this time of year is stirring up, and I don’t want you carrying it alone.I’m hosting a free Mayhem Holiday Gathering on Thursday, December 11th at 11am PST / 2pm EST. It’s a community circle where we’ll talk honestly about what this season brings up for daughters and move through it together. Expect reflection and gentle nervous system support, and a space where you’re seen without having to explain yourself.This is a cameras-on gathering Come cozy, messy, tired, hopeful....all of you is welcome.Join us:mayhemdaughters.com/holidayIf you’re already part of Mayhem Daughters, the link is in our Events section. If you’re on my email list, I’ll send it there as well.This is a free gathering, and I’d be honored to have you in the room.

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• Need a Permission Slip?

  If you need a permission slip, here you go.Signed. Sealed. Delivered. (anyone else following this with "I'm yours..." in your heads? No? Just me ?!?!)If you need more Mayhem in your life, join us over at MayhemDaughters.com

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