Wife On The Rocks I Gaslighting, Addiction, Codependency, Al Anon, Alcoholism, Recovery

Why does drinking seem to escalate every holiday season — and why does it feel so lonely for the wife watching it happen? In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we sit down together for an honest conversation about why alcoholics often drink more at the holidays and what that increase actually looks like inside a marriage. This interview explores: • Why the holidays give alcoholics “permission” to drink more • How alcohol is easier to hide this time of year • Why others don’t notice — but wives always do • The tunnel vision addiction creates, especially around drinking opportunities • How wives are focused on kids, meaning, and traditions while alcohol becomes the priority • Why alcoholics often encourage others to drink to deflect attention • What it feels like for a wife to watch this happen year after year We also share a personal Christmas story where drinking escalated, an attempt to stop was made, and how confusing and painful that experience was for both of us. It’s a raw look at how alcoholism, anxiety, and the pressure of the holidays collide, leaving wives feeling unseen and emotionally abandoned. If you’ve ever thought: • “Why does he drink so much more right now?” • “Why does no one else seem to notice?” • “Why am I the only one affected by this?” This episode will help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface — and remind you that your experience matters. 📩 Have questions or want to be added to the waitlist to work together? Email [email protected] 🎙️ Listener Q&A episodes coming soon — send your questions anytime.

What happens to holidays as alcoholism progresses? In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we share a deeply personal conversation about how alcohol addiction slowly changed our family’s holidays over the years — often in ways we didn’t fully understand at the time. This is a joint interview with my husband and me, reflecting honestly on: • What holidays looked like before addiction took over • How alcohol slowly pulled him away from family traditions • Why he began opting out, canceling plans, or avoiding holidays altogether • How anxiety and depression intensified as the disease progressed • The grief and confusion wives experience when their spouse emotionally disappears • Why missed holidays are often about addiction — not lack of love We talk openly about how alcoholism doesn’t just affect drinking — it affects motivation, connection, mental health, and the ability to show up for meaningful moments. As the disease progressed, holidays became overwhelming instead of joyful, leading to isolation, withdrawal, and eventually absence. If you’ve ever wondered: • “Why doesn’t he want to do holidays anymore?” • “Why am I celebrating alone?” • “Is this depression, anxiety, or alcoholism?” • “Does he even care?” This episode will help you understand what may really be happening — and remind you that you’re not alone, and it’s not your fault. 📩 Have a question or want to share your story? Email [email protected] 📅 Book a 1:1 coaching session: Email to be added to the wait list for upcoming session opportunities!

Do you dread the holidays because money feels out of control — and no matter how hard you plan, budget, or prepare, something always sabotages your efforts? When you're married to someone struggling with alcoholism, the financial stress of the holiday season hits different. You’re trying to manage Christmas gifts, family events, groceries, travel… all while navigating a spouse who is secretly spending, overspending, or using money to support an addiction. And because both of you aren’t on the same page, you feel like you're doing something wrong — like if you just budgeted better or tried harder, things would work. But here’s the truth: 👉 You cannot manage money effectively with someone who is also managing their addiction. 👉 You are not failing — alcoholism is destabilizing the home, not you. 👉 You have very little control over financial chaos caused by drinking. In this episode, we’ll talk about: • Why holiday money stress is so intense in homes affected by alcoholism • The emotional shame spiral wives fall into (“Why can’t I fix this?”) • Why budgeting with an addicted spouse rarely works — and why it’s NOT your fault • How to release the belief that you’re supposed to “hold it all together” • A simple truth to anchor in when the financial chaos feels overwhelming • How understanding lack of shared reality can lift a massive burden off your shoulders   If you’ve ever blamed yourself for financial stress caused by addiction, this episode will help you breathe again. 👉 Questions for the show? Email me at [email protected] Search: Financial Infidelity, Money Management, Dave Ramsey, Budgeting 

Are you the only functioning parent in your home during the holidays? Do you carry the entire load—planning, preparing, protecting the kids, managing emotions—while your husband’s drinking increases and his presence decreases? This episode dives into the heartbreaking exhaustion Christian wives face when they are emotionally and practically parenting alone, even though their spouse still lives in the home. You’ll hear why the holidays intensify this burden, why you feel so drained, and why the invisible load you carry is real, valid, and seen by God.   If you’ve ever collapsed into bed thinking, “I can’t hold this together alone,” this episode will meet you right where you are. 📩 Questions: [email protected] 📅 Book a session: Email to be added to the waiting list.

Are you wondering if your husband’s drinking or behavior has crossed the line from “social” to something more serious? Maybe you’ve ignored the warning signs because you didn’t want to believe you were living with addiction. In this episode, we’re unpacking the red flags of addiction—what they look like in marriage, why we overlook them, and how codependency and love can cloud our judgment.    You’ll learn: ✅ My real definition of addiction—and why it’s not just about how much he drinks or uses. ✅ Why so many wives and partners miss or excuse red flags in early relationships. ✅ Early warning signs that often show up before the problem is fully visible: • Past attempts at sobriety or rehab stays • A history of addiction in the family or previous relationships • Alcohol or drugs present at nearly every social event • Heavier use than others around him (but hard to see if your circle normalizes drinking) • Encouraging you to drink or use more than you normally would  We’ll talk about how codependency can disguise itself as love or loyalty—keeping you stuck in denial while addiction quietly takes over your marriage. You’ll also gain biblical insight and emotional tools to start seeing the truth clearly, without shame or fear. When you understand the red flags of addiction, you can begin replacing confusion with clarity—and take your first step toward peace, wisdom, and recovery for your family.   --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Connect & Next Steps 👉 Have a question for a future episode? Email me at [email protected] 👉 Need personal coaching to spot addiction patterns and end codependent cycles? My 1:1 sessions are open with very limited availability. Feel free to email me if everything is booked and we can see what options we can come up with:) https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession